krunchers Posted May 4, 2005 Posted May 4, 2005 well, I hung in there for awhile.Till she got back from visiting her long distance relationship after 10 weeks. She told me she thinks she found her soulmate, but yet she says i'll always be the love of her life. How can she have a soulmate and still have me be the love of her life. Dont you need to love your soulmate? I dont know what to do. Before she left we were talking about moving in and trying to work things out. Then this happened. I dont know if i should move on or not. We haven't talked for about a week now. I love her so much. We've been together for 7 years. Is she even thinking about me?
curiousnycgirl Posted May 5, 2005 Posted May 5, 2005 In a word - NO - she is not thinking of you. Sounds like she is exactly what you said - acting like a player. This is not a good nor attractive thing in anyone, male or female. In her current state of mind, she sounds like she could be fairly toxic for you. She seems to really wound you deeply. I think you are heading for more pain. Please think this through a bit more - you need to be good to yourself first!
LucreziaBorgia Posted May 5, 2005 Posted May 5, 2005 I find that a lot of people use 'soulmate' when they really mean 'I have found someone who has allowed me to map every quality onto them that I like, even if they don't happen to actually have those qualities'. 'Soulmates' often pops up when someone is infatuated with a false image they have of someone based solely on their hopes/aspirations for what they hope this person is and what they hope they will mean to them in the context of a relationship. She is so wrapped up in this guy right now - obsessive infatuation is like that: much stronger than you would think. As long as she is feeling this way about the guy, you have no chance with her. In three months or so, if the illusion wears off she'll be back professing her love for you and her willingness to get back together - but only if things don't work out for her and her 'soulmate'.
mullygrub88 Posted May 16, 2005 Posted May 16, 2005 >In three months or so, if the illusion wears off she'll be back professing her love for you and her willingness to >get back together - but only if things don't work out for her and her 'soulmate'. Well written no point in being the backup person if things don't with your ex work and the new guy. Best thing to do is try move forward, show her that you are independent and dont rely on her for your happiness. ( she may see you in a different light or you may surpise yourself how strong you have become)
incubus075 Posted May 31, 2005 Posted May 31, 2005 I just had a similar situation. I was with a girl for 2 years and we had an awesome relationship. She had said to me all the things I ever wanted a woman to say to me. She told me I made her happy when none of her previous relationships had done that. She said all these greats things about me. But I went on a trip with some friends and while I was gone she started hanging out with a guy from work. Well from that point on things deteriorated for the next 2/3 weeks til we broke up. She said it was because she needed time to figure herself out. However (we were living together at the time) I found several conversations where she had told people that she felt this guy was her soul mate. She moved out and in a short time he had a key to her new place and was hanging out with her all the time. So much for needing to be by herself. She says she loves me and misses me and wishes things could have been different. But ultimately thats all crap. If she wanted it to be different she could have made different choices. If you are already in a relationship where you are happy and have the things you want, would a soulmate make it any better when you dont even know that for sure? Would you throw happiness away for uncertain happiness that would take you to where you already were?
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