MC44 Posted July 15, 2015 Posted July 15, 2015 So I met this new girl about a month ago, we've mainly been texting but when we do talk on the phone we get lost in conversation and I've had to interrupt and cut off the phone as it has gone over 3 hours a few times. Anyway so we've had 3 dates that I thought went well. We haven't had sex yet but she gave me a blow job on our last date, said she wanted to sex on our next one as she was on her period the last time. Basically she has been really into me& I'm really into her. She's the first girl that I've really liked since a bad break up with my old long term girl. Anyway the day after our last date I watched a film that depressed me &****ed up my energy & kinda changed my whole mood& I've been feeling down ever since. On the same day I spoke to this girl didn't mention the film, but also noticed that she didn't seem as into me during that conversation(maybe my energy put her off). So I thought I'd give her a little space & decided not to call her for a couple of days just to see if she'd miss me(she texted me & I ignored it for 2 days). So after a couple of days I messaged her and she messaged me back with shorter replies and taking much longer to get back to me than she usually does. It's hard to figure woman out, so I wanted to ask your opinion on what the deal is here. And oh on our last date I did tell her I was starting to care about her & she said she was too. So why do you think she's now switched up on me all of a sudden? I don't want to come off needy, but I am really Genuinely starting to like this girl & this doesn't happen to me very often. Can I have your advice people?
empresario Posted July 15, 2015 Posted July 15, 2015 So I met this new girl about a month ago, we've mainly been texting but when we do talk on the phone we get lost in conversation and I've had to interrupt and cut off the phone as it has gone over 3 hours a few times. Anyway so we've had 3 dates that I thought went well. We haven't had sex yet but she gave me a blow job on our last date, said she wanted to sex on our next one as she was on her period the last time. Basically she has been really into me& I'm really into her. She's the first girl that I've really liked since a bad break up with my old long term girl. Anyway the day after our last date I watched a film that depressed me &****ed up my energy & kinda changed my whole mood& I've been feeling down ever since. On the same day I spoke to this girl didn't mention the film, but also noticed that she didn't seem as into me during that conversation(maybe my energy put her off). So I thought I'd give her a little space & decided not to call her for a couple of days just to see if she'd miss me(she texted me & I ignored it for 2 days). So after a couple of days I messaged her and she messaged me back with shorter replies and taking much longer to get back to me than she usually does. It's hard to figure woman out, so I wanted to ask your opinion on what the deal is here. And oh on our last date I did tell her I was starting to care about her & she said she was too. So why do you think she's now switched up on me all of a sudden? I don't want to come off needy, but I am really Genuinely starting to like this girl & this doesn't happen to me very often. Can I have your advice people? Bold above was your mistake. Who ever sent out a mass news bulletin to all men implying that girls like to be ignored as some sort of test? I feel like all over-thinking guys use this as a knee-jerk reaction to any type of perceived adversity. Here's a tip. Girls do NOT like to be ignored. Spread the word. She probably posted a thread on here asking why her new dating interest isn't contacting her, and how long she should wait until she reaches out. Kidding, but she probably took it personally. Or she's more mentally sound than that and actually took it as kind of a mean thing to do and resents you for it. Either way it's not good. Turnaround is that fast. You aren't a couple, yet. Who knows if in that two days you let someone else gain traction for her affection? My advice: Be bold. Ask her out, apologize for not being able to contact her as much, do anything. Take control of this situation if you like the girl. You are the man in this. Act like it. 2
Versacehottie Posted July 15, 2015 Posted July 15, 2015 So I thought I'd give her a little space & decided not to call her for a couple of days just to see if she'd miss me(she texted me & I ignored it for 2 days). So after a couple of days I messaged her and she messaged me back with shorter replies and taking much longer to get back to me than she usually does. It's hard to figure woman out, so I wanted to ask your opinion on what the deal is here. And oh on our last date I did tell her I was starting to care about her & she said she was too. So why do you think she's now switched up on me all of a sudden? I don't want to come off needy, but I am really Genuinely starting to like this girl & this doesn't happen to me very often. Can I have your advice people? Um, that was dumb. Why did you start playing those sorts of games. Taking 2 days to respond to a text? Now you are wondering why her responses are short "all of sudden". Not so hard to figure out. You held off on contacting her as a test; when she contacted you, you played a waiting game, now she is confused about your level of interest and if you're just playing her. It's become a standoff of sorts. You may also be losing her interest. Who knows? These are games, not real information to base decisions on. 2
DaisyBug Posted July 15, 2015 Posted July 15, 2015 Some women are hypersensitive to "vibes" and if your depressed mood caused you to sound less than enthusiastic, she may be pulling back before she gets hurt. Your not responding to her for 2 days didn't help. I mean, she blew you, and you blew her off? You didn't do yourself any favors there.
Lansing Posted July 15, 2015 Posted July 15, 2015 The key is to ask her out on dates. Maybe she is wondering why you haven't asked her out again. If she starts making up excuses for why she can't go out and doesn't offer alternate times, then you can start "worrying" 1
jen1447 Posted July 15, 2015 Posted July 15, 2015 So I met this new girl about a month ago, we've mainly been texting but when we do talk on the phone we get lost in conversation and I've had to interrupt and cut off the phone as it has gone over 3 hours a few times. Anyway so we've had 3 dates that I thought went well. We haven't had sex yet but she gave me a blow job on our last date, said she wanted to sex on our next one as she was on her period the last time. Basically she has been really into me& I'm really into her. She's the first girl that I've really liked since a bad break up with my old long term girl. Anyway the day after our last date I watched a film that depressed me &****ed up my energy & kinda changed my whole mood& I've been feeling down ever since. On the same day I spoke to this girl didn't mention the film, but also noticed that she didn't seem as into me during that conversation(maybe my energy put her off). So I thought I'd give her a little space & decided not to call her for a couple of days just to see if she'd miss me(she texted me & I ignored it for 2 days). So after a couple of days I messaged her and she messaged me back with shorter replies and taking much longer to get back to me than she usually does. It's hard to figure woman out, so I wanted to ask your opinion on what the deal is here. And oh on our last date I did tell her I was starting to care about her & she said she was too. So why do you think she's now switched up on me all of a sudden? I don't want to come off needy, but I am really Genuinely starting to like this girl & this doesn't happen to me very often. Can I have your advice people? Blow job followed by two days of you ignoring her ....kind of a douche move. 5
caringsister Posted July 15, 2015 Posted July 15, 2015 Maybe she feels like ever since she gave you a bj you've been acting different? You're mood was thrown off by a movie. You didn't call her for a couple days. She probably is wondering if you've lost interest and your wondering what's up with her. Call her and ask her out go let her see your still very into her.
Author MC44 Posted July 15, 2015 Author Posted July 15, 2015 Thank you for all of your replies. I'm gonna take on what everyone said & I found what everyone said to be helpful advice. Feel free to keep more feedback coming.✌✌
Jejangles Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 She probably was off with you on the phone in response to you acting down / sad (and it's such early days, it's hard to ask someone about it). Then you pulled back at the exact wrong time and started playing games, right when she may have already been wondering what's up. Plus women often already feel vulnerable after sexual activity steps up... She's still responding to you, so you likely have a chance, but if you really want to pursue something you need to step it up, particularly as it's likely your actions that made her cool down. I would call her and tell her you've been feeling a little off this week, to give her an explanation for why you acted different / went quiet. Then make it clear you really like her and would like to take her out to (fill in the blank). Then work hard on the date to show your interest and engage her. If she turns you down, at least you know you tried your best. You'll never know if she would have cooled down anyway or if your actions turned her off. 1
S_A Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 You ignored her after she gave you a BJ. Makes her think that when you do want to see her that it'd be to just get something out if it. Or that you've last interest in her after the BJ, making her feel like crap. The problem with this is that this may "damage" the next interaction she has with a totally deserving guy. She may be skeptical of the next guy being "in" to her. Or maybe she will over analyze what she should or should not do the next time she is dating someone which will only help complicate things. Of course maybe none of this will happen. The point is that she should probably move on to the next guy. I think you should hold off on dating until you are mature enough to not spiral out of control (emotionally) over a movie/documentary. Look, I know Interstellar has some tear-jerking moments, but c'mon on man. Two days no contact? 1
babycakees Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 Why on earth would you ignore her for 2 days?? I would assume the guy was not interested if he did that to me. This is exactly why she's acting this way.
Fleur de cactus Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 You got the answer!!, it is you who started the whole issue.
Author MC44 Posted July 16, 2015 Author Posted July 16, 2015 Good looking out my people! Your advice worked, I called her we spoke & now she seems to be back to her old self. So thank you to all of my people on here. Sometimes you just need a fresh perspective ✌✌✌
ChicagoSparty Posted July 16, 2015 Posted July 16, 2015 Your mood was thrown off by a movie?!? Are you on your period? Come on guy...it was a movie. Unless you were watching home videos of your drunk dad abusing your mom, you shouldn't let movies affect your mood...especially toward other people. Call...don't text...her and apologize for being a baby.
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