Peanutbutterjelly124 Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 (edited) Should I be concerned we made out for 4 hours and I didnt feel anything? Edited July 14, 2015 by Peanutbutterjelly124
Dreamworld Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 I heard that with some men, the response gets a little slower when they go age 40 and above. Is he in good shape? Taking any medications? Stressed in general? Maybe it's taking him some time is all. He doesn't watch a lot of pornography does he? Sadly this is becoming an immediate automatic reaction for me now, as I am constantly seeing a correlation between porn use and erection problems during real sex. 1
casey.lives Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 kissing for 4 hours.. that's crazy .. he probably started off hard and then it died down, he got comfortable with the idea of just "chilling" 2
Dreamworld Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 Should I be concerned we made out for 4 hours and I didnt feel anything? Oh oops I didn't read the 4 hour part properly. Yikes that's a long time. Maybe he's really nervous? My original questions still stand though.
Author Peanutbutterjelly124 Posted July 14, 2015 Author Posted July 14, 2015 I heard that with some men, the response gets a little slower when they go age 40 and above. Is he in good shape? Taking any medications? Stressed in general? Maybe it's taking him some time is all. He doesn't watch a lot of pornography does he? Sadly this is becoming an immediate automatic reaction for me now, as I am constantly seeing a correlation between porn use and erection problems during real sex. Late 30s, in good shape. Dont know about porn, maybe, since he has been single for a while. No medications and no stress
Author Peanutbutterjelly124 Posted July 14, 2015 Author Posted July 14, 2015 (edited) kissing for 4 hours.. that's crazy .. he probably started off hard and then it died down, he got comfortable with the idea of just "chilling" It got more and more intense as we went though, and even when we were spooning I didnt feel anything? If so, why would he continue? do some guys need actual touch? Oh and I am a pretty hot 20 something year old. This was the first time we made out. Edited July 14, 2015 by Peanutbutterjelly124
gaius Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 I'd be worried. =/ The penis always tells the truth. 1
Author Peanutbutterjelly124 Posted July 14, 2015 Author Posted July 14, 2015 I'd be worried. =/ The penis always tells the truth. You mean he is pretending to be attracted to me? Or he is gay? He pursued me for two-three months.
gaius Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 (edited) You mean he is pretending to be attracted to me? Or he is gay? He pursued me for two-three months. I don't know the root cause, but for whatever reason making out with you for the first time for 4 hours isn't stimulating enough for him to get an erection. And there's no real excuse for that. The first time he just gets his hands on you he should be popping wood, let alone making out for 4 hours. If he's truly interested. I get hard for my girlfriend just talking to her on the phone. Edited July 14, 2015 by gaius 1
Dreamworld Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 You mean he is pretending to be attracted to me? Or he is gay? He pursued me for two-three months. I don't think a guy would make out with you if he was pretending to be attracted to you. That would be kind of..crazy. You said he has been single for a while? Maybe since he hasn't been with a woman for awhile he's super freaking nervous, or I have to agree with Gaius, he's not becoming stimulated enough. Please oh please don't let it be porn. 2
Author Peanutbutterjelly124 Posted July 14, 2015 Author Posted July 14, 2015 I don't think a guy would make out with you if he was pretending to be attracted to you. That would be kind of..crazy. You said he has been single for a while? Maybe since he hasn't been with a woman for awhile he's super freaking nervous, or I have to agree with Gaius, he's not becoming stimulated enough. Please oh please don't let it be porn. Im used to guys getting hard just by the sight of me taking my top off or kissing. But these are 18-26 year olds. this new guy is late 30s. Would a guy like that need a huge amount of stimulation? We were naked on the waist up and he kept kissing me everywhere, and throughout the night and in the morning too. 1
elaine567 Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 Im used to guys getting hard just by the sight of me taking my top off or kissing. But these are 18-26 year olds. this new guy is late 30s. Would a guy like that need a huge amount of stimulation? We were naked on the waist up and he kept kissing me everywhere, and throughout the night and in the morning too. A normal heterosexual guy, single for a while presented with a woman naked from the waist up is going to "react", if he doesn't, there is definitely some problem. 5
gaius Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 I'm turning 32 next month peanut butter and it's not an issue. Especially the first time. 5 extra years isn't going to make that drastic a difference.
Dreamworld Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 Im used to guys getting hard just by the sight of me taking my top off or kissing. But these are 18-26 year olds. this new guy is late 30s. Would a guy like that need a huge amount of stimulation? We were naked on the waist up and he kept kissing me everywhere, and throughout the night and in the morning too. No a healthy guy in his late 30's should not have trouble responding. I am 35 and have dated guys in that age range and they were very responsive. He had a full view of your loveliness and no response? I am sorry, there is a problem there, and it is not you, as I am sure you already know from past experiences. One more time: please oh please don't let it be porn. Sorry to keep getting back to this, but with this problem, we've got 19 year old boys having erection problems.
ascendotum Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 Making out for 4 hrs he could well have had a boner for some of that time, but it died down in the last hour. Did you have your hand on his crotch on & off during that time? If he has been single for a while, then porn very easily could have substituted for a gf in that time. If he has pursued you for a number of months he is definitely attracted to you. Maybe he is on an SSRI or some other med. I can understand why you are a little disappointed he didn't react more strongly for you, but don't write him off yet. See how things go the next couple of times and don't be afraid to ask him if anything is wrong even though he might be a bit embarrassed.
xcupid Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 Is the problem that he didn't get hard? Or is the problem that you didn't feel any attraction to him?
DaisyBug Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 He doesn't watch a lot of pornography does he? Sadly this is becoming an immediate automatic reaction for me now, as I am constantly seeing a correlation between porn use and erection problems during real sex. I've been noticing this, too! Some men are so hooked on porn that they can't even perform in RL anymore. Pathetic and sad for the woman in their lives. 1
Author Peanutbutterjelly124 Posted July 14, 2015 Author Posted July 14, 2015 Making out for 4 hrs he could well have had a boner for some of that time, but it died down in the last hour. Did you have your hand on his crotch on & off during that time? If he has been single for a while, then porn very easily could have substituted for a gf in that time. If he has pursued you for a number of months he is definitely attracted to you. Maybe he is on an SSRI or some other med. I can understand why you are a little disappointed he didn't react more strongly for you, but don't write him off yet. See how things go the next couple of times and don't be afraid to ask him if anything is wrong even though he might be a bit embarrassed. No I didnt touch his crotch. He was wearing jeans at the time. I know it could be tight but I was sitting on his lap and I didnt really feel very much. He was definitely turned on though and seems very into me, because he wanted us to stay awake the whole night. I am sure he is not taking any medications.
Author Peanutbutterjelly124 Posted July 14, 2015 Author Posted July 14, 2015 Is the problem that he didn't get hard? Or is the problem that you didn't feel any attraction to him? I guess I am surprised that I didnt feel anything because with the previous guys Ive been with, its been super obvious, but they were a lot younger. I am super attracted to him and he seems super attracted to me too. I'm just wondering if there are reasons why I didnt feel anything.... is it due to restrictive clothing, or he watches too much porn? If he watches porn, does that mean we are doomed
elaine567 Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 If he watches (too much) porn, does that mean we are doomed Not necessarily.
Keenly Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 Stop always jumping to porn People. All the porn in the world won't prevent you from getting turned on by a new partner, first time making out. It's always the most exciting. Porn isn't going to keep him from getting it up unless he's bored sexuality. 2
Author Peanutbutterjelly124 Posted July 14, 2015 Author Posted July 14, 2015 Stop always jumping to porn People. All the porn in the world won't prevent you from getting turned on by a new partner, first time making out. It's always the most exciting. Porn isn't going to keep him from getting it up unless he's bored sexuality. If he is bored sexually, wouldnt he be pressing me for sex? He didnt really make a move in that direction, like he never asked me to remove my underpants....
elaine567 Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 Stop always jumping to porn People. All the porn in the world won't prevent you from getting turned on by a new partner, first time making out. It's always the most exciting. Porn isn't going to keep him from getting it up unless he's bored sexuality. OK common things are common and porn use nowadays is very common, internet porn addiction and excessive use amongst men is a well documented issue. ED caused by porn use (P.I.E.D), is easily fixed by just stopping the use of porn for weeks/months as a trial, without having to go down the medical route or trying some possibly harmful other "alternative" method. A long term single man in modern times is a prime candidate for being porn addicted. That is why it is mentioned foremost on an internet forum. Stopping porn use, is an easily instigated, harmless fix and if it works then great, if it doesn't, then a doctor is needed for more investigation into the root cause. 2
Recommended Posts