Spice Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 Hey guys. My relationship right now I feel is heading towards a break up. I would like to share my story with everyone and would greatly appreciate some feedback or opinions. Thank you ahead of time for reading my story. My girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year and a half, 17 almost 18 months, now. I am 21 years old and she is 20. We met at our university through friends at a football game. Everything has been amazing. I have a had a few relationships before but nothing like this. We just clicked and ever since then its been great. So great that I started saving money to get an engagement ring. Being the broke college student I am its going to take a while to save for it but its a step in the right direction. This summer we both moved back home. Luck would have it we only live 40 minutes apart. So we see each other about once a week sometimes twice if we have the extra gas money or if we are both off from our summer jobs. I work at a local green house and she babysits for a family friend. She has been babysitting for that family for about 4 summers now. Everything about this summer was great up until a few weeks ago. She convinced herself she was pregnant because she was having unusual cramps and she was over 2 weeks late. I remained supportive for her through the whole ordeal and even made plans to drop out of college and get a full time job if it comes out that she is pregnant. Luckily about a week ago she got her period and we even took a pregnancy to be safe and that came back negative. After that shes been distant and extremely moody towards me. Like about 4 days ago I get this phone call from her and shes crying. I asked her whats wrong and she played this whole 20 questions game with me. After three hours on the phone with her she still refused to tell me what was wrong. I told her I needed to get off to get something to eat and she got extremely angry at me and hung up on the phone. Shes never done that. We always tell each other that we love each other before getting off the phone. After that through this morning its the same thing it has been. She is distant and extremely moody. Last night she called me and I told her I was meeting up with old high school friends at the local bar. Same thing as the last phone call. Got mad at me and hung up. I thought about calling back but I said screw it and went out with my friends and had alot of fun. So much fun that I didnt go to bed until 5 this morning. At 9 am I get a phone call that wakes me up. Its her and big shocker shes crying. It was the same thing where she refuses to tell me whats wrong. After about 15 minutes I convinced her to text me to the issues. Get ready for this. Her problem the night I stayed on the phone for 3 hours with her was that the mom she babysits for asked her if she could sweep more. Then the phone call I got today was about this note the mom left for her. It said that she wants the kids to be outside today and to limit tv. I tried for over 4 hours to calm her down and to show her that the mom ment absolutely nothing bad by any of those things. I even recommended that she should talk to the mom herself. Everytime I mentioned that she would just keep telling me that I will never understand and that she wont talk to her. After about 6 hours of talking to her last night partying caught up with me and I asked if it was okay to take a nap and then I could keep helping her. She threaten to break up with me. She has never done that before so I was very much shocked. I kept asking if she wanted me gone or what I did wrong but she kept telling me to go to sleep. I gave up and stopped talking to her. I called up my friends and now we are on a road trip to the city for a rock concert. At first I felt guilty about doing this but after a little bit its a huge relief to be with friends and to not have to worry about everything. In the last 3 hours she has sent me 6 text messages and 3 phone calls. All of them are pretty much her apologizing and telling me I dont understand what she is going through. Which is ridiculous because everytime I ask her to describe to me what she is going through she tells me to forget about it. Ad everytime I try helping her she shoots me down. I'm just done with the games. Spending over 3 hours on the phone asking her whats wrong or spend my entire day trying to get her to explain what she is going through has wore me out. I feel I definitely deserve another night out with friends. What do you guys think? Why would she suddenly do this extreme change on me?
Ruby Slippers Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 She's a young woman with roller coaster hormones and emotions. Don't worry too much about any of this. And definitely don't babysit her on the phone for hours. Many (most?) women are emotional and reactionary until about mid-30s. Every little thing can feel like the end of the world. When I think of all the silly drama I stirred up in my younger days, I just have to laugh at how ridiculous it all was! Now that I've matured and learned to relax and enjoy life without all the hand-wringing, I'm much more stable and much, much happier. 1
Redhead14 Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 I'm suspecting that this scare simply made her emotional. Since her period was late too there may be hormonal issues as well. That being said, her reaction is way ocer the top. A couple of crying fits is one thing, what she's been doing is too much. I recommend sending her to the doctor. The posibility of endometriosis or ovarian cysts or ectopic pregnancy should be ruled out. Is she tyically dramatic about other things? She may be histrionic and simply seeking attention for no other reason but attention and sympathy. Rule out medical issues. If there are none, don't entertain her behavior.
Author Spice Posted July 14, 2015 Author Posted July 14, 2015 (edited) I'm suspecting that this scare simply made her emotional. Since her period was late too there may be hormonal issues as well. That being said, her reaction is way ocer the top. A couple of crying fits is one thing, what she's been doing is too much. I recommend sending her to the doctor. The posibility of endometriosis or ovarian cysts or ectopic pregnancy should be ruled out. Is she tyically dramatic about other things? She may be histrionic and simply seeking attention for no other reason but attention and sympathy. Rule out medical issues. If there are none, don't entertain her behavior. I asked her today if she would go to the doctor for me because I was concerned about her health but that sent her into another fit and she accused me of being insensitive of her girl stuff. No she has never been this dramatic ever. That's why I am asking for advice because this is a huge shock to me. Never in a million years did I think I would be avoiding her phone calls like this Edited July 14, 2015 by Spice
Fleur de cactus Posted July 14, 2015 Posted July 14, 2015 She is immature girl who came up with imaginary pregnancy. Maybe she wanted to be pregnant and now her dreams of having a baby are gone. Was she happy when she had her period? or disappointed? She needs to grow up. seriously, babysitting someone over the phone for 6 hours? That is awful!! even if you live together you cannot talk for six hours, there is time to do some other activities. She is a pain. Maybe she wants to move in with you?
Author Spice Posted July 14, 2015 Author Posted July 14, 2015 (edited) She is immature girl who came up with imaginary pregnancy. Maybe she wanted to be pregnant and now her dreams of having a baby are gone. Was she happy when she had her period? or disappointed? She needs to grow up. seriously, babysitting someone over the phone for 6 hours? That is awful!! even if you live together you cannot talk for six hours, there is time to do some other activities. She is a pain. Maybe she wants to move in with you? She seemed happy when she announced that she got her period. She called it a blessing that it happened. I don't know if she wanted to be pregnant or not but we have talked about it and we both agree that if we get married after graduation we just want two kids in about 10 year time. Enough to get a house and travel some. So I dont know why she would want to go against our future plans. On top of that she said she doesn't want to have sex anymore until marriage. Its a bummer but I understand why she doesnt want sex anymore I don't mind texting or talking to her over the phone for that long. As long as I have no plans for the day and she really needs me. Which in this case I deemed that she needed me and I wasnt doing anything today so I did that. But I agree now. In the future I will definitely cut down on that time talking and focus on doing something more productive. We actually talked about moving in together. Come August I am getting an apartment and at first she wanted to move in but we agreed that she should stay in the dorms again this year due to a big scholarship. But come by May we were planning on her moving in with me Edited July 14, 2015 by Spice
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