guild11 Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 Hey guys, I find it kinda funny and to be honest somewhat upsets me, seeing that my GF (2 month) keeps photos of her ex in the facebook. At first I didnt care much but last weekend we were on vacation, we had fun, had plenty of time and took photos together. Later on she uploaded the photos with one exception, She used the pictures that does not include me, not a single pic with me. Would you care if you had same situation?
La.Primavera Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 Why don't you casually ask her why there are no photos of you in the vacation photos she uploaded. It is a reasonable question to ask. Whatever the reason is it would be worth finding out what it is. 2
Qboro90 Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 She does not want people to know she has a boyfriend. Has she ever posted a picture with you on her fb page? Is she listed as "in a relationship"? . You can test her by uploading a picture of you and her with a caption "my beautiful gf" and tag her in it. This will make the photo appear on her page. Now if she deletes the photo or removes it that gives you proof that she is hiding something and you need to break it off ASAP. 1
Author guild11 Posted July 13, 2015 Author Posted July 13, 2015 She does not want people to know she has a boyfriend. Has she ever posted a picture with you on her fb page? Is she listed as "in a relationship"? . You can test her by uploading a picture of you and her with a caption "my beautiful gf" and tag her in it. This will make the photo appear on her page. Now if she deletes the photo or removes it that gives you proof that she is hiding something and you need to break it off ASAP. She didnt removed the "in relationship" status from her page when they broke up, I asked her why she didnt uploaded our photos. She said that we dont have any... LOL what a lie. I wont be tagging any photos i'll just be more careful.
PrettyEmily77 Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 She didnt removed the "in relationship" status from her page when they broke up, I asked her why she didnt uploaded our photos. She said that we dont have any... LOL what a lie. I wont be tagging any photos i'll just be more careful. She should have removed her status when they broke up. The pb with your reasoning OP is that it'll bring more paranoia, anxiety and frustration on your part. You need to take a more active role in this situation, and not accept any cr*p; you have a right not to be happy and her explanation isn't convincing, to be polite. I personally wouldn't sit on it. I'd get to the bottom of it with a satisfying explanation / resolution to the situation, or I would walk without delay.
sandylee1 Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 Hey guys, I find it kinda funny and to be honest somewhat upsets me, seeing that my GF (2 month) keeps photos of her ex in the facebook. At first I didnt care much but last weekend we were on vacation, we had fun, had plenty of time and took photos together. Later on she uploaded the photos with one exception, She used the pictures that does not include me, not a single pic with me. Would you care if you had same situation? Not everyone sees the need to delete their history by removing photos of their ex, especially if it didn't end badly . I would wonder why she posted pics of you on from the vacation though. Have you got any pics of her on your page? Not ones you've tagged , just pics with her in. Sometimes girls are cautious and are waiting to see what you do, before they do the same. A few questions.... How long ago did she and the Ex break up? Why did they break ? Who dumped who? How long were they together? How old is she? It may well be that she's not over him and wants to appear single, just in case there's a chance to get back with him. 1
Author guild11 Posted July 13, 2015 Author Posted July 13, 2015 Not everyone sees the need to delete their history by removing photos of their ex, especially if it didn't end badly . I would wonder why she posted pics of you on from the vacation though. Have you got any pics of her on your page? Not ones you've tagged , just pics with her in. Sometimes girls are cautious and are waiting to see what you do, before they do the same. A few questions.... How long ago did she and the Ex break up? Why did they break ? Who dumped who? How long were they together? How old is she? It may well be that she's not over him and wants to appear single, just in case there's a chance to get back with him. They broke up almost a year ago. I'm not that active on the facebook and I update it very rarely while she is active most of the time. They broke up after 3 years and as far as I know she ended it. He is around 30, and she is 26, I'm 25. It really bugs me, she made a post of collage with photos and wrote "surprise vacation" but no word of me. If someone inspects her page all they gonna see is her photos with him while I'm kept as a secret.
veggirl Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 ermmm are you sure they are broken up? does her family and friends know about you? does she keep in touch with the ex? I don't think having pics of him is a big deal, it's a pain in the ass to go deleting all that stuff, but the hiding you is a HUGE red flag.
sandylee1 Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 They broke up almost a year ago. I'm not that active on the facebook and I update it very rarely while she is active most of the time. They broke up after 3 years and as far as I know she ended it. He is around 30, and she is 26, I'm 25. It really bugs me, she made a post of collage with photos and wrote "surprise vacation" but no word of me. If someone inspects her page all they gonna see is her photos with him while I'm kept as a secret. Okay. Well she was with him for a while , but as she ended it, she clearly wasn't happy with how things were going. I wouldn't say a year was a rebound either. Do you know if her ex is in a relationship? Do they have mutual friends that you know of? The keeping you secret on FB would cause me concern, but has she otherwise introduced you to her friends. Another thought is that it's just been 2 months. Maybe she wants to see how your relationship develops before going public. I know a friend who once said that as soon as she told people about a new BF she had, they broke up soon after and she felt it was a jinx , so she wasn't going to say anything the next time till she was further in to the relationship and they were both serious about each other.
blueskyday Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 (edited) Ugh facebook! I would not like this situation either. It would make me feel insignificant and hidden away. I once had a boyfriend who had pics of his ex on facebook and none of me. It turned out he wasn't over her, and eventually went back to her. ( not to say this is your situation; might not be at all.) For me, I decided then and there not to ever blow anything off again. Maybe an overreaction, but it's better for me now. I think of it in terms of "what is fair?" It's not fair she has pics of an ex and none of you. It's not fair or cool to post vacation pics and deliberately leave out pics with you in them. Why? What is her reasoning? Ask her. Don't be afraid. I don't sleep with guys who keep their dating profiles up past the time we agree to be exclusive. It's not fair or ethical in my book to appear single when one is not. I refuse to be that woman who accepts crap so I can look "chill" and easy going. I find guys actually respect a bit of moxie. They know I have other options, and will exercise them if need be. Pics of the ex need to be put away, or I won't feel special or exclusive. I think you should decide how you want to be treated and have a convetsation with her. At best, she's insensitive and may see the light when you speak to her. It's important to be with someone who cares about how you feel. At worst, she's not over her ex, or want to appear single. It just seems as though she should be proud to display photos of you two and say how amazing you are and how much fun you both had. Edited July 13, 2015 by blueskyday
clia Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 They broke up almost a year ago. I'm not that active on the facebook and I update it very rarely while she is active most of the time. They broke up after 3 years and as far as I know she ended it. He is around 30, and she is 26, I'm 25. It really bugs me, she made a post of collage with photos and wrote "surprise vacation" but no word of me. If someone inspects her page all they gonna see is her photos with him while I'm kept as a secret. Well, I have a slightly different perspective. She's only been dating you for two months. She may just not be ready to start splashing pictures of you all over her Facebook. Frankly, most people I know wait at least a few months (until things seem to have some longevity) before they start posting pics of new boyfriends or girlfriends on Facebook. It's nothing personal. It's not wanting to deal with questions if things don't work out. As for her ex's pictures...is it fair to say she hasn't posted any pictures of them in the past year since they broke up? If so, I think you are being silly. Do you expect her to go through and delete her entire three year relationship off Facebook because she's been dating you for two months???
PrettyEmily77 Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 Well, I have a slightly different perspective. She's only been dating you for two months. She may just not be ready to start splashing pictures of you all over her Facebook. Frankly, most people I know wait at least a few months (until things seem to have some longevity) before they start posting pics of new boyfriends or girlfriends on Facebook. It's nothing personal. It's not wanting to deal with questions if things don't work out. As for her ex's pictures...is it fair to say she hasn't posted any pictures of them in the past year since they broke up? If so, I think you are being silly. Do you expect her to go through and delete her entire three year relationship off Facebook because she's been dating you for two months??? I agree on principle, there's nothing wrong with being cautious in a new R as long as you're clearly stating your reasons for it, and there's also nothing wrong with keeping pics of the ex but there's something wrong in telling him the reason she didn't post any pics of them together is because she didn't have any, because that is not true. That wouldn't sit comfortably with me. I hope for OP's sake it's a silly misunderstanding that will be resolved by a frank discussion on the status of their R.
Tayla Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 its her history, her choice. Treat her like an adult. While it may concern you that she has a past, we all come with one.
Author guild11 Posted July 13, 2015 Author Posted July 13, 2015 I agree on principle, there's nothing wrong with being cautious in a new R as long as you're clearly stating your reasons for it, and there's also nothing wrong with keeping pics of the ex but there's something wrong in telling him the reason she didn't post any pics of them together is because she didn't have any, because that is not true. That wouldn't sit comfortably with me. I hope for OP's sake it's a silly misunderstanding that will be resolved by a frank discussion on the status of their R. We talked about it, I told her what I think, She said "I love you but I feel its kinda early to put photos of us together" then she proceeded to delete the pictures of her ex. and thats it 1
PrettyEmily77 Posted July 13, 2015 Posted July 13, 2015 We talked about it, I told her what I think, She said "I love you but I feel its kinda early to put photos of us together" then she proceeded to delete the pictures of her ex. and thats it Nice to hear OP . Talking is always good . 1
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