SpEiZ Posted May 3, 2005 Posted May 3, 2005 Ok this is kind of hard to explain, but I'll do my best. I went out to party two weekends ago, when I met this girl who dragged me over to her place. She was already out on a date, but she wanted me instead of the guy she was dating. So this guy showed up while we were fooling around at her place, and what happened is, he took her to a nachspiel. I didn't wanna go there so I just went home, and didn't put much thought into it either. (well, I was under the influence of alcohol ) So a week pasts, and this girl sends me and sms, wondering if I want to meet her and do something together. Of course, I agreed to this. After all, she's a beautiful girl with a helluva body. So we had a "date" at her place. She was easy to talk to, and she thougt I was easy to talk to also. We went out, had a few drinks. We ended up in bed after we got home. We wanted to hook up again, so the next day, I went to her place again. Then she tells me about her future plans. How she wants to have kids, wants to establish a family and so on. Asks me when I want to have more kids (I already have one), and when I would be ready to move in with someone. Basically she wants to know when I can "give" her all this IMO. She also WANTED me to come inside her, and she told me she didn't use any protection. I didn't either. And well, I didn't come inside her. So how can someone want all this after a couple of days? I can understand that she wants to establish a family and all. But why does she tell me this so early? To add to the story, she told me that she had met me a while ago, and noticed me. I don't recall this. But it seems she knows more of me than I know of her. It's just weird, and hard to explain. It's not like she's obsessed to be with me either. She sends me an SMS now and then, and we'll going to meet today. I also have to add that she's been in a long-term relationship only 4 months ago. She says she then started to date a lot, but that I was the only one she was interessted in sharing bed with. She has A LOT of male friends, and it kind of freaks me out that I'm now falling in love with this girl. It seems she might just want to get a family, and that I might be used for this purpose(?). Or could it be something else? Should I just go for it, and try to get a working relationship with this girl. I don't know what to do, please give me some advice wise people!
ReluctantRomeo Posted May 3, 2005 Posted May 3, 2005 Originally posted by SpEiZ I don't know what to do, please give me some advice wise people! In the absence of any wise people, I'll do my best IMHO, there are various possibilities, but they boil down to 2. She could be a serious girl, planning ahead. Maybe because she wants to know where you stand, already having a child, maybe even because she has had her eye on you for a while. Or she is rushing ahead way too fast. She makes - and breaks - commitments easily. Until you know her way better, you must at least consider the possibility of the latter. Play it slowly, get to know her, don't engage your heart too rapidly. If she is the serious planner type, she will love this. If she is the frivolous type, this strategy will protect you against hurt. For my money, given some of the things you have said, my first guess would be frivolous. Sorry. Serious girls don't switch dates midway.
noname Posted May 3, 2005 Posted May 3, 2005 ummmm... pump the brakes... slow it down a bit... first thing you need to do is get tested second, is to suggest that she does too if you plan to keep sleeping with her third, is to start using protection for your own good. i know this is your perogative, but to face facts, neither of you may not be around to see your kids grow up... (i cannot believe for the life of me why in 2005 people are still not protecting themselves) and do yourself a favor take it a little slower, you are falling in love in a couple of days to someone who skipped out on her date to start a family with you... we used to call that kind of person a flake. sorry a bit harsh, she might be a real nice person, but protect your heart and get to know her a little bit before you start making relationship decisions. because you may take her out on a date one night and have to go back to knock on her apartment door when she leaves you in the club. and the guy who she leaves with may just give her the gift that keeps on giving... and then you are f--ked...
Author SpEiZ Posted May 4, 2005 Author Posted May 4, 2005 You all are probably right, I'm moving waay to quick here. She says she didn't cheat in her last relationship, which lasted for six years, but of course, I only have her word for that. Negatives aside though, she seems pretty honest, and at least tells me about her faults. And I realize "falling in love" may sound crazy, but I didn't know what word to use for it. It got somewhat different meaning in English than it does in Norwegian. But I really do like her. I'll make it slow though. Tnx for the replies
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