caringsister Posted July 9, 2015 Posted July 9, 2015 I have a very dear friend who is one of the nicest, kindest, gentlest people I know. He has a heart of gold and is a handsome man, however he doesn't think any woman could love him because he has a severe case of rosacea which makes his face look extremely red. He also has social anxiety issues which cause him to remove himself from situations that make him uncomfortable. He is a very hard worker and his job calls for him to be out in the hot Cali sun which aggravates the rosacea. He has tried different creams, lotions, ointments and various other things, but nothing seems to help and as a result he has fallen in to the belief that he will never have a relationship. He said, No woman could ever love him with the way he looks. It breaks my heart for him because he is a great guy. I have known him for twenty one years and he is like I said one of the most nicest people I have ever met. He is only fourth seven years old and his hopes and dreams have almost faded of ever having a someone to love and share his life with. He has shared with me that he would like to meet that special woman and someday get married. I keep telling him that there is a woman out there for him and when they find each other she will see past all the things that he sees as negative and she will see deep into his heart and see the good in him. What do you think? Do you agree with me that there is a woman out there some where that would see past the rosacea and could love him for who he is or is he doomed to be lonely for the rest of his life?
Author caringsister Posted July 10, 2015 Author Posted July 10, 2015 ????? Come on ladies. I know somebody has got to have some input?
xxoo Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 Yes, I think a good woman can love him. Many famous and successful men have rosacea, including the charming bill Clinton (aka Slick Willy). The social anxiety may be his bigger challenge in meeting a woman. 2
DaisyBug Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 Gee, he sounds wonderful! I couldn't care less about rosacea or social anxiety. What part of CA are we talking here? *bats eyelashes* 1
lollipopspot Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 he has a severe case of rosacea which makes his face look extremely red. He also has social anxiety issues which cause him to remove himself from situations that make him uncomfortable. I don't know what the treatments are for rosacea, but he ought to try to deal with it if possible - including more "alternative" treatments. But, it's not in and of itself a deal breaker. The social anxiety is a bigger problem. If he removes himself when he's uncomfortable, he's probably not in situations where he's meeting new people. He can indeed get treatments (therapy and possibly even medication) to help deal with that. Is he doing what he can to fix what he seems to see as his two biggest hurdles to having a relationship?
Author caringsister Posted July 10, 2015 Author Posted July 10, 2015 I don't know what the treatments are for rosacea, but he ought to try to deal with it if possible - including more "alternative" treatments. But, it's not in and of itself a deal breaker. The social anxiety is a bigger problem. If he removes himself when he's uncomfortable, he's probably not in situations where he's meeting new people. He can indeed get treatments (therapy and possibly even medication) to help deal with that. Is he doing what he can to fix what he seems to see as his two biggest hurdles to having a relationship? He is very leary about anxiety meds. He hashheard to much about the side effects. He is thinking cognitive therapy.
Author caringsister Posted July 10, 2015 Author Posted July 10, 2015 Gee, he sounds wonderful! I couldn't care less about rosacea or social anxiety. What part of CA are we talking here? *bats eyelashes* He really is a great guy. Such a good hearted person. Hes San Fenando Valleyish area lol
Author caringsister Posted July 10, 2015 Author Posted July 10, 2015 Is the rosacea really that bad? To him it is.
RoseVille Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 SkinMedica Redness Relief CalmPlex. Tell him to use it. Presto! 1
Author caringsister Posted July 10, 2015 Author Posted July 10, 2015 SkinMedica Redness Relief CalmPlex. Tell him to use it. Presto! I will pass the info on. Thank you
DaisyBug Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 He really is a great guy. Such a good hearted person. Hes San Fenando Valleyish area lol Too bad - that's a ways away. He sounds like a sweetheart. You had my interest piqued there for a bit.
Leigh 87 Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 I have a big nose and a very cute man is is currently smitten with me. Big noses aren't attractive in women and I get plenty of male attention and dates. Come on, does your pal realizes that most of us aren't some devine super model? My aunt is very fat and has an adorable husband... For 50 plus years.... They are truly in Love and she is as fat as they come. But she is a beautiful person on the inside and she had a sparkle in her eye that hooker her hubby at first glance. My cousin is married to a fat mexican girl. They are maaaaajorly lovely dovey and in a STRONG honeymoon phase! They are MADLY in love. 1
d0nnivain Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 Although I'm happily married, the rosacea wouldn't bother me as much as the social anxiety. I'm a pretty outgoing person most of the time & I have the ability to sweep others along with my activities but I couldn't deal with having to constantly reassure somebody. Has he ever been in therapy for this? My inability & unwillingness to deal with this doesn't mean there isn't the perfect person out there for him somewhere. Why don't you try fixing him up & giving him a safe place for the introduction with no pressure.
elaine567 Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 The roseacea isn't his problem, the social anxiety is. 3
Lois_Griffin Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 Well, he's 47 years old and afraid of his own shadow. I'm sure he's a sweetheart who looks like he has a sunburn on his face, but he's basically completely inexperienced with women from the sounds of it. I'd have to pass as I'm much more attracted to Alpha males. But I'm sure someone will love him.
elaine567 Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 Famous Faces With Rosacea - Rosacea Center - Everyday Health I do not see those celebrities hiding themselves away. Treatment for his rosacea and therapy for his social problems.
DaisyBug Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 The roseacea isn't his problem, the social anxiety is. The social anxiety is probably due to the rosacea. If he's getting stared at in public like he's a freak or something, pretty soon you're going to start avoiding wanting to get stared at. Me, I'd prefer an inexperienced man over an experienced one. Just sounds so much healthier, and I don't just want to be FB #137, you know? A guy like this can get his experience with ME. I feel bad for the guy that he feels so bad about himself. It's not a big deal at all!! 2
Gaeta Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 Rosacea is nothing. He needs to dedramatize his situation. There are rare skin conditions out there that are way worse than his. My daughter dated for a short while a young man who had a super rare skin disease that made his skin fall and blister. He looked like his entire body was covered in psoriasis. He was a sweetheart and It never bothered her. 1
Popsicle Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 (edited) Any time a single and available woman is trying to set me up with one if her male "friends" and I haven't seen him, I immediately know that he's ugly. If he weren't SHE would have been with him. You should date him Caringsister since you like him and care about him so much. Edited July 10, 2015 by Popsicle
Popsicle Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 Wouldn't bother me at all. I always thought you were male.... Duh! 1
Author caringsister Posted July 10, 2015 Author Posted July 10, 2015 (edited) Any time a single and available woman is trying to set me up with one if her male "friends" and I haven't seen him, I immediately know that he's ugly. If he weren't SHE would have been with him. You should date him Caringsister since you like him and care about him so much. I knew someone would suggest this and wonder why if he's so great why don't I date him. We have been friends for twenty one years and we have what feels more like a brother sister relationship. It's rare ty o find such a good male friend and we both know this is the way it should be. As for me, my focus is raising my kids. I'm not in the market for a relationship. I am enjoying being single (that's a whole other story) Edited July 10, 2015 by caringsister
LUSLOVEJE Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 no. I don't trust men with skin disorders. many of them are extremely insecure. insecure men = clingy, annoying, and sensitive. just no. sorry.
jen1447 Posted July 10, 2015 Posted July 10, 2015 Any time a single and available woman is trying to set me up with one if her male "friends" and I haven't seen him, I immediately know that he's ugly. If he weren't SHE would have been with him. You should date him Caringsister since you like him and care about him so much. I have a feeling this is what he'd run into most of the time if he tried ....he's a great catch - for somebody else. His issues are significant and compounded by the fact that he already believes he'll never have someone. That alone tends to be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Unfortunately ppl do put a lot of stock in first impressions and surface beauty, so if he's not even exposed to ppl enough for them to get to know his personality, and the ppl he does know already think of him as a good catch for somebody else ....yeah, he may be right unfortunately. 1
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