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Posted

Help!!! Yesterday was definitely one of my worse days.

 

My husband went to visit his mother this weekend and he returned home with a new attitude. He said that he would rather divorce than fight anymore and he refuses to stand up for me with his mother (who is controlling and does not like me).

 

I could not stop crying today. I went to work and had to wear my sunglasses for most of the day because every time someone asked me how I was doing, I broke down. I had to leave early and cried all the way home too.

 

I feel like if I give in and "try again" I can avoid all the heart ache I am feeling right now.

 

How do you get over this?

Posted

I can completely understand the "what if he changes" question. I think that's where I'm at.

 

Also I think you might do well reading about "co dependency". That's where all of your guilt for him comes from, I believe.

 

Girlfriend, you are so young and have so much life ahead of you. Start working on YOU and the rest will fall into place.

 

I've been on an emotional roller coaster for about 9 months and still can't find the strength to go file for divorce. My husband moved out 7 months ago.

 

Through counseling, good friends, this web site, and lots of tears and weight loss I'm getting stronger.

 

Life goes on. It will all make sense for you one day.

 

Debilou

  • Author
Posted

Debilou - thanks for your support.

 

I read your story and can relate to the weight loss as well as not understanding how someone can just stop being there. I also often wish there was another woman. Maybe that would help with my own feelings of the inability to get him to communicate. Even when I told him I was leaving, he said "I just think you will be happier without me". He does not seem to want to try - how can you get tired of someone you love?

 

This has been the most difficult time of my life and I know if I give in and try to work on this I will have temporary relief from this anxiety and pain - but I also feel I am delaying the inevitable.

 

Tomorrow I am going to counseling and have vowed to go everyday if I have another day like yesterday. I was a mess!

 

Good luck to you Debilou.

  • 4 months later...
Posted

Hi I read your post & I'm in the process to trying to figure out HOW to leave my H. How are you doing now, its been months since you last posted & I was wondering how your doing & if things are working out in your favor.

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