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Posted

I was listening to a radio show today where the guy was having "performance" issues cuz he was really into his gf...

 

So gf is frustrated cuz he can't "get there" in the bedroom and the Dr. and radio show hosts were serious in agreeing that he was "just too into his gf" and for him to try to explain that to her. And, for him to just keep on trying and taking it slow and in time he'll be able to relax and just engage her.

 

I mean, we women, if we don't see a guy making a move...having problems "performing" and/or is tongue-tied, aloof, etc with us. We're gonna see it as a rejection. Last thing we're gonna see it as him being "too" into us.

 

Is there any truth to this? Can a guy be "too" into a woman?

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)
I was listening to a radio show today where the guy was having "performance" issues cuz he was really into his gf...

 

So gf is frustrated cuz he can't "get there" in the bedroom and the Dr. and radio show hosts were serious in agreeing that he was "just too into his gf" and for him to try to explain that to her. And, for him to just keep on trying and taking it slow and in time he'll be able to relax and just engage her.

 

I mean, we women, if we don't see a guy making a move...having problems "performing" and/or is tongue-tied, aloof, etc with us. We're gonna see it as a rejection. Last thing we're gonna see it as him being "too" into us.

 

Is there any truth to this? Can a guy be "too" into a woman?

 

It's true. Not every guy will experience it, but if he finds that right girl and has a genuine interest in her, it will happen. The woman won't ever believe it though because it sounds like a typical cheesy guy lie, so the relationship will probably go to crap from there.

Edited by S_A
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Posted
It's true. Not every guy will experience it, but if he finds that right girl and has a genuine interest in her, it will happen. The woman won't ever believe it though because it sounds like a typical cheesy guy lie, so the relationship will probably go to crap from there.

 

**Sigh** :(

Posted
Absolutely. He might be having nervous issues or performance anxiety because he wants to impress her.

 

I think there is a lot more to it than that.

Posted (edited)

Sorry to spam, but it has to do with a lot more than merely wanting to impress her. Guys in general want to impress (or be impressive). It shouldn't surprise anyone if a guy even wanted to impress a prostitute during sex.

 

If a guy gets really into a girl, a lot goes on on the inside; inside his head and his heart (yeah, guys got one of those). They just go to total s**t during the act of sex and there's no way the penis is going to be able to keep hard at this point.

 

I think there is a movie that touches on this with Jake Gyllenhal. Could be remembering wrong though.

Edited by S_A
  • Like 1
Posted
I was listening to a radio show today where the guy was having "performance" issues cuz he was really into his gf...

 

So gf is frustrated cuz he can't "get there" in the bedroom and the Dr. and radio show hosts were serious in agreeing that he was "just too into his gf" and for him to try to explain that to her. And, for him to just keep on trying and taking it slow and in time he'll be able to relax and just engage her.

 

I mean, we women, if we don't see a guy making a move...having problems "performing" and/or is tongue-tied, aloof, etc with us. We're gonna see it as a rejection. Last thing we're gonna see it as him being "too" into us.

 

Is there any truth to this? Can a guy be "too" into a woman?

 

May be the case. But I would say my ex husband had this from day one to day end. And things never improved. And he never tried to improve things.

 

So whatever the reason, it is very understandable, what you do with it to improve things is the deciding piece. Because, yes, at the end of the day I saw it as a rejection of me, my needs, and respect for me.

 

For the record, this was an almost 15 year relationship. So I gave it a very good shot!

Posted
May be the case. But I would say my ex husband had this from day one to day end. And things never improved. And he never tried to improve things.

 

So whatever the reason, it is very understandable, what you do with it to improve things is the deciding piece. Because, yes, at the end of the day I saw it as a rejection of me, my needs, and respect for me.

 

For the record, this was an almost 15 year relationship. So I gave it a very good shot!

 

Does not sound like your husband had what Gloria was referring to. His issue is entirely different.

Posted
I was listening to a radio show today where the guy was having "performance" issues cuz he was really into his gf...

 

So gf is frustrated cuz he can't "get there" in the bedroom and the Dr. and radio show hosts were serious in agreeing that he was "just too into his gf" and for him to try to explain that to her. And, for him to just keep on trying and taking it slow and in time he'll be able to relax and just engage her.

 

I mean, we women, if we don't see a guy making a move...having problems "performing" and/or is tongue-tied, aloof, etc with us. We're gonna see it as a rejection. Last thing we're gonna see it as him being "too" into us.

 

Is there any truth to this? Can a guy be "too" into a woman?

 

Yep. I've run into performance anxiety quite a bit, but I think the real issue is in taking it too seriously. I've never had any problems reconciling it just by being silly to lighten the mood and then dialing up the 'sexeh' in a way they can't not respond to while not focusing on the dick. Combine sexual stimulation and lack of scrutiny and a dick will always respond accordingly, assuming there's no real physical dysfunction.

Posted (edited)

I don't think this is performance anxiety Jen. The "he's too in to you" thing is something much deeper than that. I'm not sure how to explain it to be honest. The "he's too in to you" thing can even happen to a "stud" who has never had performance anxiety issues.

Edited by S_A
Posted

Some guys can get intimidated by certain women, leading to not feeling like a man and that showing in the bedroom. But that's not really being so into her you can't perform. It's kind of a dishonest context presented to the woman in order to spare her feelings.

Posted
Does not sound like your husband had what Gloria was referring to. His issue is entirely different.

 

How can you say that? How would you know?

Posted
I don't think this is performance anxiety Jen. The "he's too in to you" thing is something much deeper than that. I'm not sure how to explain it to be honest. The "he's too in to you" thing can even happen to a "stud" who has never had performance anxiety issues.

 

Yeah but I think it's essentially the same thing - he can't perform due to anxiety over x-y-z. x-y-z may be sexual intimidation or idolizing the woman, etc.

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)
How can you say that? How would you know?

 

Your Husband shared the same symptom as the guy in the radio show, but it does not sound like he had the same problem. It sounded more like your husband was losing interest in sex (he did not care to fix his issue). Also, the "he's too in to you" thing does not take 15 years to fix. It should play itself out on its own.

 

Yeah but I think it's essentially the same thing - he can't perform due to anxiety over x-y-z. x-y-z may be sexual intimidation or idolizing the woman, etc.

 

I can agree with that. It is due to an anxiety over something, but it has nothing to do with sexual intimidation. A guy that has a "He's too in to you" moment is not worrying about if he is going to give you an orgasm. I mean, he wants to sure, but that's not what's causing me to go flaccid.

Edited by S_A
Posted
Your Husband shared the same symptom as the guy in the radio show, but it does not sound like he had the same problem. It sounded more like your husband was losing interest in sex (he did not care to fix his issue). Also, the "he's too in to you" thing does not take 15 years to fix. It should play itself out on its own.

 

 

 

I can agree with that. It is due to an anxiety over something, but it has nothing to do with sexual intimidation. A guy that has a "He's too in to you" moment is not worrying about if he is going to give you an orgasm. I mean, he wants to sure, but that's not what's causing me to go flaccid.

 

Umm, no. But thanks for playing. ;)

  • Like 1
Posted
Umm, no. But thanks for playing. ;)

 

No worries.

Posted
I can agree with that. It is due to an anxiety over something, but it has nothing to do with sexual intimidation. A guy that has a "He's too in to you" moment is not worrying about if he is going to give you an orgasm. I mean, he wants to sure, but that's not what's causing HIM to go flaccid.

 

LMAO! I can't correct my post. I originally wrote "that's not what's causing ME to go flaccid". :o

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