CristinaAnne92 Posted July 8, 2015 Posted July 8, 2015 Okay, this is a long story. But I really need some insight. I met my ex when I started working at a banquet hall. I was with another man. I know this sounds corny but as soon as I laughed at the first joke he made there was a instant connection between us. He pursuesed me and talked about me conatantly. My co workers who had worked with him for a long time said they never saw him get so hung up on someone. We became super close, talked on the phone till 3 am sometimes. And were always there for each other. We were best friends. I ended up leaving the boy I was with for him. But at this time, he had some serious depression going on. He was 27 working part time at a banquet hall, no education living at home with his single mom who basically babies him. She was super controlling and he lived upstairs drinking his feelings away constantly. We started hanging out more and more, and then started seeing eachother. I pulled him out of his drinking problem. And told him how great of a person he was and that there was no reason for him to be doing this to himself. He had some self worth. He then started looking for a second part time job. Got one with a little pushing then got promotes to full time in 5 months. I was so proud of him. I moves into his mother's house with him. She caused a lot of problems. We were so in love, and we were best friends. Our sex was amazing, our conversations. Everything. Then idk what happenend. He started acting werid. He stopped having sex with me. He said he thought he had low testosterone and had to go to the doctor. Mean while, I actually developed an eating disorder (I was heavier in hs and lost a lot of weight and him not having sex with me made me feel like it was my fault). I became depressed and scared for a few months. And he sometimes tried to pull me out of it but sometimes he didn't. Every party we went to he always was "that guy" who got horribly drunk.... Throughout all this I loved him and just wanted to help him be the best he could be. About a month ago we got into a fight and he broke up with me. He said he had been on his mind for a while and he didn't want it to be true so he fought it. He said the relationship turned more into a friendship. He was a mess and so was I. We both cried our eyes out during the breakup. And hugged. He said he couldn't loose me as a friend. Because we've been so close for so long... We work together every Sunday at the banquet hall. Its hard and I do my best to act okay. We talked/ argued for a month after the relationship ended. finally he told me we couldn't talk for a while because my emotions were effecting his decisions and we needed time and space to heal. I slipped up once and he was very rude to me. Then I didn't talk to him for 4 days. This Monday he texted me saying his mom had a few of my things she was going to give me back and that we would always be friends and he just needs space before talking to me again. I didn't answer, I get another text saying "okay well I'll see you Sunday then" I didn't answer and hour goes by and he calls me. I did answer He apologized for how he treated me 4 days ago. And we started talking. I was hurt and told him how I couldn't understand why he was doing this to me. I was an amazing girlfriend. I always had his back and loved him. He could have gotten fat and bald and I still would have thought he was amazing. He cried the whole time on the phone as did I. Then we went back to not talking. I'm so torn. He said he wants to go out. Meet new peoole, do new things and figure some things out. He said he will always thank me for being there for him and i was the best girlfriend he ever had. And if its ment to be it will be. But he wasn't in love with me anymore. I feel lonely. And I'm not talking to him right now. I miss him so much. Idk what to do with myself. Will he reach out to me? Is there any chance for us? We were best friends for 2 years . then dated for 2. Our friendship didn't die within the relationship ....
d0nnivain Posted July 8, 2015 Posted July 8, 2015 He;s not going to reach out & if he does it's because you his faithful back up plan are letting him use you. Don't do that. Other then the sex, this guy has very little to offer you long term. If you can't stand being around him on Sundays look for another banquet gig at a different hall. 1
Author CristinaAnne92 Posted July 8, 2015 Author Posted July 8, 2015 He;s not going to reach out & if he does it's because you his faithful back up plan are letting him use you. Don't do that. Other then the sex, this guy has very little to offer you long term. If you can't stand being around him on Sundays look for another banquet gig at a different hall. You don't think he'll realize that maybe he shouldn't have left... And maybe I'm the best thing that ever happened to him :/ ?
Itspointless Posted July 8, 2015 Posted July 8, 2015 I am sorry for your pain. I agree with d0nnivain. Also I have to admit that I have zero-respect for guys who chase girls who are in relationships. That man really is not that great, he is greedy.
d0nnivain Posted July 8, 2015 Posted July 8, 2015 Probably not. He's not exactly a self starter if at 27 he's working a PT dead end job, has no education or plans to get one & still lives with his mommy. Plus his depression precludes deep introspection absent professional help. Finally if he generally thinks he's not good enough for you (a thought process you can't fix for him) now that he has made this "mistake" and dumped you even if he realizes it down the road, he will be too embarrassed to try to come back. Let him go. While you may have been the best thing that ever happened to him, I'd be shocked if he was the best thing that ever happened to you.
Author CristinaAnne92 Posted July 8, 2015 Author Posted July 8, 2015 I should mention his promotion was to full Time. And now he works full time and the banquet hall on Sunday. But I guess that hardly makes a difference.... Whether I choose to come back or not. I do think at some point down the road after he's dated some. And realized its hard to put up with all his shenanigans. He might regret it. But idk if I'll be available to him then. Thank you... 1
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