Trace Posted July 6, 2015 Posted July 6, 2015 I broke up with fiancé of 3 years around 3 months ago. At the time I had my reasons, even though I still loved him I just thought it was the right thing to do. I moved out and tried to heal. I heard from a mutual friend that he has a new girlfriend already and is 'loved up'. Since then I have been tearing myself apart, thinking about the good times, how much I miss him, still love him etc. I just feel like I have gone back to square one. I'm I jealous? How do I get over this? I have no contact with him, deleted his phone number, not on social media. I'm so upset and down I just want to move on.
Learningtowalkagain Posted July 6, 2015 Posted July 6, 2015 I'm in your exact situation. 3 months isn't a very long time. Im at 6 months, had my reasons for moving on as well, now she has a new bf and I can't figure out why it bothers me so much. From reading these forums it's 100% typical to feel this way when your ex is with someone else. It's not just you. I wouldn't get back with her if she was single again so why do I care? Because I still have feelings for her. Things I've done that have helped: Go to the gym. The physical benefits are great but the mental ones are even better Get out of the house, get outdoors, spend time with family. If you find yourself lonely and grieving pick yourself up and do something to take your mind off it These forums are a great tool. Most of the advice and encouragement is beneficial 1
Satu Posted July 6, 2015 Posted July 6, 2015 At 3 months you're still very early in your recovery. I put this together for myself, but some of it might help you. 1. Recognise that you're still in the crisis phase - you are very hurt, disappointed and angry, but the intensity of your feelings will reduce. 2. Don't suppress your feelings, or tell yourself that you shouldn't be feeling what you're feeling - that never helps. 3. Externalise your feelings by writing them down, talking to a trustworthy person, or using any other mode of expression that feels right. 4. Remind yourself frequently that you can and will have a good life without this person. 5. Remind yourself frequently that you can and will love again. 6. Take care of your body: Eat enough and eat healthily. Drink enough water. Thats 1.5 litres a day for a female. Get a bit more rest than you think you need. Do some easy exercise - nothing too strenuous. If you feel physically unwell go to see your doctor. 7. Do not allow yourself to become socially isolated or withdrawn. 8. Establish Total No Contact with your ex. No contact directly, indirectly, or by social media. 9. Keep up with all your responsibilities and things you have to do. 10. Do not use alcohol or drugs in an attempt to self-medicate. 11. Post here as often as you want to.
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