Calidude6 Posted July 3, 2015 Posted July 3, 2015 I feel like in today's world, relationships are not lasting as long as they should or maybe it's my stupid generation. Either way, I feel like a old soul at the age of 25 because my recent ex, I wanted her for life. Now the next girl I date and if I fall for her, I'll want the same thing...for life because I like to fight for a relationship and work hard at it to make it last. However, the girls I date break up after about 2 years and have to start all over again. Maybe I'm not dating a mature woman? I suppose but it's almost feels like I won't have that long last relationship I want. I did the single life, I had my fun and I'm bored of it. Just not for me anymore. I'm sure there are plenty of woman out there that want that long last relationship but I guess I have no luck with it. Thinking I met the one and they leave. Well.....their loss I guess 2
cessna Posted July 3, 2015 Posted July 3, 2015 Nothing lasts forever. Just remember we're all born into this world alone and we all die alone!
Popsicle Posted July 3, 2015 Posted July 3, 2015 I'd say yes you aren't picking mature, or should I say, marriage-minded women. There are marriage-minded women and marriage-minded men and they kind of stand out from the others, imo. 1
fitnessfan365 Posted July 3, 2015 Posted July 3, 2015 Maybe the problem is that you're too relationship focused. Instead of having fun and letting things develop naturally, you try to rush and force things along. People need time to develop feelings for each other.
walkingonair Posted July 3, 2015 Posted July 3, 2015 I feel like in today's world, relationships are not lasting as long as they should or maybe it's my stupid generation. Either way, I feel like a old soul at the age of 25 because my recent ex, I wanted her for life. Now the next girl I date and if I fall for her, I'll want the same thing...for life because I like to fight for a relationship and work hard at it to make it last. However, the girls I date break up after about 2 years and have to start all over again. Maybe I'm not dating a mature woman? I suppose but it's almost feels like I won't have that long last relationship I want. I did the single life, I had my fun and I'm bored of it. Just not for me anymore. I'm sure there are plenty of woman out there that want that long last relationship but I guess I have no luck with it. Thinking I met the one and they leave. Well.....their loss I guess Well one thing that people don't understand is that breakups are supposed to happen.Have you eve met someone who hasn't ha their heart broken?nope!That's because as awful as it sounds they were supposed to get heart broken.We have to date and get hurt because that gets us ready for our final and real relationship.Most things happen for a reason.
sandylee1 Posted July 3, 2015 Posted July 3, 2015 Try and establish earlier on in the relationship what they want out of life , where they see themselves in say 3 years time. They might be reluctant to say , because women ofter prefer guys to talk about wanting marriage first. I totally get how you feel about wasting time , but with the way marriages end you should be glad the last one didn't work out, as it probably wasn't meant to be. It's crazy sometimes , because there are lots of girls wanting just the same as you.
Satu Posted July 3, 2015 Posted July 3, 2015 I was quite serious when I spoke about the present moment. That's all any of us have. If the present is good the future will take care of itself. Forget about the past and the future. The present is the only place where we have any influence and the ability to act. 3
MissBee Posted July 3, 2015 Posted July 3, 2015 (edited) I feel like in today's world, relationships are not lasting as long as they should or maybe it's my stupid generation. Either way, I feel like a old soul at the age of 25 because my recent ex, I wanted her for life. Now the next girl I date and if I fall for her, I'll want the same thing...for life because I like to fight for a relationship and work hard at it to make it last. However, the girls I date break up after about 2 years and have to start all over again. Maybe I'm not dating a mature woman? I suppose but it's almost feels like I won't have that long last relationship I want. I did the single life, I had my fun and I'm bored of it. Just not for me anymore. I'm sure there are plenty of woman out there that want that long last relationship but I guess I have no luck with it. Thinking I met the one and they leave. Well.....their loss I guess I think sometimes people idealize relationships of the past as great simply because people stayed together, when staying together does not a good relationship make. My parents have been together for over 26 years and believe me, majority of it included cheating and lots of drama....yet, I think they will die together. After one of my most difficult break-ups I learned and grew a lot from it and realize that it's actually okay for a relationship not to last forever. I want to get married and have kids, so of course I want someone to settle down with for the long haul, but I am realistic and realize I might have to date a while before that happens. Plus we grow and we change, you're not 45, you're just 25. Breaking up doesn't mean the other person is evil and just because you didn't stay with someone for eternity doesn't mean that something is wrong. I am marriage-minded and when I get into serious relationships that's the goal, but I'm not someone looking to marry ANYONE just because...and it's happened that after being with a man I realize that spending the next 40 years together is not something I want, and it's okay. Every gf won't be your wife. Most people have to date around before settling down and nothing is wrong with that. I actually think it's better, as usually if you've had multiple relationships you learn more about yourself and what you want and don't want and how to be a good partner and can then give more to say a marriage relationship. It's been very useful for me to change my mentality and think of relationships as teachers that teach you about yourself and sometimes they are seasonal and as you grow and change you have to let each other go and move on to a new lesson. I'm sure you'll eventually get someone for the long haul but at 25 I would say having 2 year long relationships is admirable. Edited July 3, 2015 by MissBee i 2
d0nnivain Posted July 3, 2015 Posted July 3, 2015 Calidude, You are 25. Not everybody is marriage minded at that young age. In my 20s the idea of forever terrified me. As the people around you mature your chances of finding a like minded person should increase.
candie13 Posted July 3, 2015 Posted July 3, 2015 I was always a bit scared to date, in my 20s. I understand your apprehension. Forever is a big word. I remember reading an article that was saying that people need around 12 to 15 relationships (each one lasting at least 3 months) to understand what they really want out of their partner. People learn about eachother through the others, through emotional equations, through intimacy... and yes, through breaking up. Instead of being frustrated for not being able to have stability - which is something that some people crave more than others - use your age to learn, really learn about the women around you. What you like about them. What you dislike. Get to know them. Maybe even date a few... You have your whole life ahead of you. Stop judging the others and focus more on yourself because with all this rush, you risk to chose a person who long term may not compatible with you. Everybody's fighting the same battle. Everyone wants to be happy. Make sure you're doing all you can in that direction. Don't jump, breathe! 2
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