Indysgirl Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 I have recently been seeing a 22 year old bloke and I'm 27. He doesn't act his age, but I have to admit I have a bit of a problem with the fact that I'm older than him! I have never been out with anyone younger than me before. Guess I just wanted to ask what everyones thoughts were on dating younger guys??
HoldOn Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 What's his lifestyle like compared to yours? Is he out drinking all night every night, while you're at home? 5 years is no big deal, it's about maturity level and compatibility.
UCFKevin Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 I'm 25 and I'm seeing a girl who's 19 but she doesn't act like it at all, she's actually quite mature for her age, so if things are fine, then there's nothing to really worry about.
yuv Posted May 2, 2005 Posted May 2, 2005 Well, most of my relationships have been with older women (I'm 34). Initially, every single one of them made it an issue when the relationship started. Not a big issue, but they'd all mention it. The worst tends to be with the biggest age difference, and mine was 10. When I was 31, I dated a 41 year old who chalked up many differences we had to difference in age (as opposed to culture, taste, religion, politics, opinion, etc.) We had many serious talks about how it might be if I were 40 and she were 50 hitting menopause and how she'd look physically, etc. I have this advice for you, having been on the receiving end of it several times: the more often you make an issue out of it, the more you distance him. Perhaps you don't mean to, but every time you tell him (for example), Czechoslovakia split to create the Czech Republic and the Slovak Republic but he wouldn't recall because he was only 10, it's like pushing him away a little at a time. But perhaps you don't say anything at all (that's ideal, trust me. Work it out here. Don't rib him.) Maybe you can answer a question for ME here while I have you reading. Most men everywhere like to be with younger women. At 33, I had a relationship with a 23 year old. Tell other guys that and you earn their admiration. Tell them you're with a 43 year old and you get a less positive reaction (though a minority of fellows do understand and assume you like more experienced women.) It's a rare man who prefers older women... why aren't women flattered, at least a little bit?* My wife is 3 years older than I am and even she made a very big deal out of it (and made me angry with her several time when we dated). Three years... what kind of difference is that? It was purely psychological. I graduated high school when she was graduating college. We still have a HUGE commonality of generational experience. So, anyway, I don't know why women do it (and it's been all of them in my experience) but it gets really old, and it WILL stand in the way of your relationship unless you get comfortable with it, then move on to develop a deeper relationship with him based on who he is... HoldOn's questions are what you should be concentrating on the moment you accept that 5 years isn't worth spending any time worrying about. I'd encourage you to post any thoughts about why you feel the way you do, as I think it will give insight to younger guys who happen to read this thread later. *I have asked this flattery question of others. One answered essentially that it almost seemed unbelievable, like she preferred to think that I'd dump her as soon as I met someone younger. When I met my wife, she wanted to know roughly how many other older women I'd been with (she was not interested in numbers of women I'd been with, she wanted to know if this was really my taste, or if she was the first one who was older). Not sure why, but she felt better hearing that the majority were older.
whichwayisup Posted May 2, 2005 Posted May 2, 2005 As long as you both are comfy with it, it really shouldn't matter what anybody else thinks. Be happy and secure in the relationship...The rest will just fall into place.
Jtizzle Posted May 2, 2005 Posted May 2, 2005 no probs with the age difference..im 18 with a 27yr old..its all in the maturity level as whats been stated above. besides maturity, its all in your comfort level when your with them. if all you two do is laugh and have a great time together, age shouldnt be a factor..its all in your happiness..be it if your 27 and dudes is a thousand..its all in how you feel about the person
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