rabblerouser218 Posted June 30, 2015 Posted June 30, 2015 I've been lurking around here for the past few weeks after a month and a half relationship ended. Here's the story, as crazy as it sounds: I picked up a job through a staffing agency after losing my old one. A few months into working a new hire started. This new hire wound up being the love of my life, and really I could say still is. Before I even knew anything about her or even her name I felt this constant pulling toward her. The first day of her new job she wound up working with me. Long story short we were inseperable to the point of jitters and nervousness when we didn't know where the other one was if we weren't working together. Long story short, we spent every available moment together. Not quite doing anything in particular, but just spending time together. Over the first couple weeks we both realized that we are mirror images of each other. Same tastes, preferences, experiences. But there were other things that borderline on bizzare. Our birthdays are one day apart. Mine is june 10, hers is june 11. We live in the same apartment complex....and have the same apartment number, just different building. Yes, after being placed together at work some 20 miles away from where we live, we realized that we've been neighbors for the last 2 years. I've known her van because of the June sticker on her plate. Always wondered who I shared a birthday with lol. In the end, this all made things more difficult with the breakup. I don't mean to sound sappy, but I'm being completely honest when I say I've never in my 37 years alive experienced the feelings I've had with her and for her. I've married someone that i've felt less about in the beginning, but that was years ago and only lasted a year. Everything was amazing. We found motivation in each other, we experienced comfort from simply being in the same room together. It wasn't long before we said to each other with complete honesty that we loved each other. By the end of 7 weeks we couldn't stand being away from each other. That's when she dropped it on me... She's married and has been seperated from her husband for about 4 months. Writing that sentence just made me realize that I'm not quite over it all. I am doing a lot better that I was 3 weeks ago when she broke up with me. She said that our relationship has hit her like a ton of bricks. All for the same reasons that we love each other. She never saw "us" coming and never expected it to happen. Neither did I. Because of that, she says that she want's to give her relationship with her husband one last try. She told me "I'm sure it's doomed to fail, I havent' felt anything for him in over a year and every time I'm around him all I think about is you. But I have to do this, and I'm sorry. This isn't goodbye, you aren't losing me. Sometimes people need each other, and thats how I feel with you." I was devistated but I wanted her to do what she needed to do. Even though she wasn't up front with me about her seperation I understood. She was scared because she didn't want to lose me. And to be honest I still do want to be friends with her. I don't want to lose someone like her. I'm happy with the relationship we have now because we have a really solid support system with each other. Just talking to each other makes a **** day more tollerable. I feel I've met the love of my life. I'm a believer that there's more than one person out there for us, but it blew me away that it's happened this far along in my life. I explained to her that I'm here as a friend and always will be, but she needs to do what she needs to. I'm not going to wait around for her, but at the same time I'm not actively pursuiting relationships. I haven't since my last breakup 2.5 years ago. I believe in just naturally letting it happen, much like this relationship just sort of happened on its own. We where brought into each others lives by chance. I've always found those relationships to be the best. It's been three weeks. The first week was murder. I was a wreck. But she let me talk to her about it and answered everything honestly and up front. Two weeks later I'm doing a lot better but still get a little misty eyed once in a while. It's a little tricky when everything reminds me of her. The computer desk I'm at right now we picked up together at a garage sale. My living room is rearranged and absolutely love it, thanks to her helping me do it. I understand there's a big consensus of not talking at all or the rule of no contact. I tried that. But two days into the breakup she texted me. "are you okay?". Then she called. She wanted to make sure I was okay because she knew I was having a hard time. That entire week every conversation was initiated by her. Fast forward to now and we're doing well. In reality, we have the same relationship we did before, its just not physical. I'm actually suprised. I never would have imagined that she would have wanted to put so much work into saving our relationship and stay friends. We're amazingly close, we tell each other things that no one else knows. And you know what? I love it. I don't know what will happen down the road, and I'm not worried about it. For now, I have an amazing friend and I wouldn't trade what we had, and the memories of it for anything. Feed back? Suggestions? Analysis? Things to look out for? Thanks!
Recommended Posts