ThisisIt606 Posted June 28, 2015 Posted June 28, 2015 I've posted about this guy before but a run down: met on tinder, had 7 dates, and he's paid for the majority of them, we do a pretty equal amount of initiating text contact and sometimes chat for an hour or so via text. We hang out about 2x a week and have been dating for a month, have been intimate. I don't have any 4th plans yet and would like to do something with him. Is it too soon (in terms of relationship development) to see if he wants to hang out on the 4th? We haven't discussed any sort of labels, but he lets me know his plans for the week/what he's doing when he's not seeing me so I never feel like I have to "wonder" what he's up to. I was thinking of a outdoor activity in the afternoon followed by hopefully finding fireworks somewhere.
Author ThisisIt606 Posted June 28, 2015 Author Posted June 28, 2015 I found an event but it's not cheap.... $120 per person. However it has the whole evening planned out. Food, drinks (non alcoholic) smoothies and ice cream from good brand named places. Harbor side seating, a DJ, 3 jumbo screens of the local concert, and a good view of the fireworks. I for one LOVE the 4th of July so I would like do to this. I want to invite him and I would (gulp) pay for the both of us since I"m extending the invite. Do you think this is too expensive? My worry is that he might look up the event and see the price and get freaked out I'm spending so much money on the 2 of us. However I know our dates so far (since he has paid for the majority) have been over $100 by now... Is this too elaborate of an idea? I want to have a good time, but don't want him finding out the price to backfire.
d0nnivain Posted June 28, 2015 Posted June 28, 2015 $120 pp for the 4th of July? I'm assuming parking is extra. I wouldn't pay that on principle, but I'm cheap You are on the right track with you need to make the plans & ask him & expect to pay for it since you are the one pushing for the holiday together. Pushing may be a bit of an overstatement. I'm not suggesting your approach is incorrect In fact I think it's right on. I'm just trying to wrap my head around the ridiculous cost. Is there a cheaper place to go see fireworks? I'd go with a blanket, a cooler and free or even pay for parking but that is about it. Certainly do not buy these tickets until you know he's on board. He may have a tradition of which you are not aware. 1
Author ThisisIt606 Posted June 28, 2015 Author Posted June 28, 2015 (edited) Thankfully we wouldn't have to worry about parking as there is public transit which is in close walking distance, so it would just be the ticket price which includes food, drinks, view, etc. The actual concert in my area is free but extremely crowded and you have to get there in the AM and basically campout there all day and aren't allowed to leave for security reasons. This (paid) event is close by but doesn't appear to be as congested and you are free to come and go as you please. It definitly has its perks. I plan to call tomorrow to ask how the seating works. I think I'll text him tomorrow, saying I hope he's enjoying his trip, and then ask if he has 4th plans/would be interested in that. Also good point about his possible tradition, I didn't even think of that! Edited June 28, 2015 by ThisisIt606
d0nnivain Posted June 28, 2015 Posted June 28, 2015 Again I think planning is called for. In another context I don't even so much as have a problem with the actual cost. It's just my frugal nature is having trouble digesting the value proposition of $240 for the 4th. Yikes! If it is worth it to you, fine. My biggest caution is that you don't pay the money before he says yes So my strategy would be to ask him: Hey I found this great package for the 4th. List all the benefits & the location. Then ask him if he'd like to join you, your treat. Specify the hours. If he comes back to you with an invite to his BFF's annual BBQ, go, If he begs off for said BBQ & doesn't invite you, think long & hard about how serious he is.
Author ThisisIt606 Posted June 28, 2015 Author Posted June 28, 2015 thanks, that's good advice. I just logged into this event website as a member and the tickets dropped to $70 each, so that makes me feel better. Yeah, i'll definitely ask him tomorrow and see if he has any offers he invites me too. If he wants to spend it separately, I agree that's a red flag about how serious he is about the relationship. 1
d0nnivain Posted June 28, 2015 Posted June 28, 2015 For what you described $70 seems OK. But now the price drop is again making me wonder about the value proposition. Why is this not selling out? Regardless, I hope you get the fireworks you want. 1
Gary S Posted June 28, 2015 Posted June 28, 2015 Don't buy tickets for somebody you don't know (you don't know them well enough to know that they will show). That said, sure, a lady can ask a man out anytime, many do.... however, I always tell the ladies not to do it in the first couple months if you want to avoid rejection.... let him do it, most men that like you will..... I say, why risk rejection if you don't have to? Other than that, it's no problem.
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