chubachoop Posted April 30, 2005 Posted April 30, 2005 Can anyone offer me any advice on how to make the whole long distance thing easier? I see my boyfriend at least every two weeks but in those two weeks I just miss him so much I cant concentrate on my studies, I even consider giving up university sometimes to move some place new with him (the only reason we are long distance is because im still in education, he would live with me right away). I was so career minded before we got together but now its as if this course isnt even important to me anymore!
HoldOn Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 Okay, I am in the same boat. I see my bf 3 weekend out of the month. 2 years from now, I'll graduate from law school and finally get to marry my man! I used to get really upset because I would count down the days until I got to see him again. I'd wake up every morning and think, "6 days till I get to see him!" But that just makes you more depressed! So, don't do that. And what are you doing over your summer break? Can you live in his city for the break? Also, try to keep yourself busy. If he's your only social outlet, that only makes it worse. Perhaps you could join a club or something?
Author chubachoop Posted May 1, 2005 Author Posted May 1, 2005 Thanks holdon for your advice. I guess its just a case of getting used to it. Weve only been together 3 months. How long have you been with your boyfriend?
HoldOn Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 I've been with him for a year and a half, but LD for the last 9 months! But in two weeks when exams are over, I am moving in with him for the summer. Remember that absence does make the heart grow fonder! You're all mysterious to him because you are far away, if that makes sense. It is easier to maintain your own life. I always joke with him about the benefits of a LD relp. For example, when I get sick, he won't get sick from me. I don't have to shave my legs every day. And I really only care about how I look when he is coming, otherwise I could care less! How far are you from your bf? Could you visit more? It's easy for me because I make a schedule out for him. When I first told him I was going away he said he'd visit me every two weeks. I said I would visit him once a month (because I am very busy with studying). So, whenever I go over to his house I make a calendar for him on the computer and let him know when he should come to visit and when I am visiting him. Sounds a little controlling, but it works for us! I only have to go two weeks without him once a month. I do HATE it. But I try not to think about it. I'll see him on Friday, then the next weekend, I'm moving in with him (for the summer)! yay!
Nara Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 My lover (England) and me (Bavaria) are having a common (and private) online-diary. Apart from loads of telephoning and emailing this is a very beautiful way to us of "being together", as we write down any feelings, hopes, daily desasters and joys, poems, erotic fantasies, simply anything. We post pics in there, songs...just great if you're having to deal with distance. Makes it bit easier...
Author chubachoop Posted May 1, 2005 Author Posted May 1, 2005 thanks for your replies holdon. nara thats a lovely idea about the diary as well. I think it is just a case of getting used to it. I see him at least every two weeks and when i do see him its for 4 days at a time. We see each other every opportunity we get. I have a habit of becoming a bit obsessed when i get a boyfriend, thinking about him all the time wanting to be with him constantly so i guess this long distance is actually good for me in teaching me to keep my independence and my own life. I dont think I'll live with my boyfriend in the summer tho cos he will still be working so Im sure i'll get bored having no one to hang out with while he is at work, and besides my home town is near the sea and his isnt Is ur boyfriend at college too holdon? will he be on holiday when u stay with him? Thanks again for your advice
HoldOn Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 Is ur boyfriend at college too holdon? No, he's a teacher. So he'll get the summer off. But I won't because I'll be working this summer at a law firm. I'm in law school, not college. So I think it helps being a little older and knowing that we're getting married after school ends anyway. So, you see him 4 days every two weeks? When people are dating each other in town, they might see each other twice a week. You seeing him the same amount of times, it is just more concentrated!
Author chubachoop Posted May 1, 2005 Author Posted May 1, 2005 thing is Im probably the same age as you, maybe im just more immature when it come to romance lol i believe my boyfriend and i will get married too, maybe not as soon as i graduate but eventually. Im feeling alot better today, I think coz my work is so boring right now and ive so much of it im thinking about quitting and about how much i miss my boyfriend!
HoldOn Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 I'm 27. I assumed you were younger since I thought you were in college. Of course your relp is much newer than mine, so that probably contributes to you thinking about him all the time!
Author chubachoop Posted May 1, 2005 Author Posted May 1, 2005 phew i am younger! i have an excuse to be imature lol! Im 26. Im not in college im at university i just call it college cause the university i went to before was really small and called a college so its kinda stuck
HoldOn Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 i have an excuse to be imature lol! Im 26. yep you're practically in diapers! Where are you from? I don't know what you mean about college and university being different...
Author chubachoop Posted May 1, 2005 Author Posted May 1, 2005 Im from england. are you american? we have school then college then university. Im doing university twice tho cause I made the wrong choice when i was young in choosing a course
HoldOn Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 Yeah, I'm American. You know we don't understand anything over here! How far away could your bf be when you live on that tiny island? Lol. You must get your education for free if you're going back again...
Author chubachoop Posted May 1, 2005 Author Posted May 1, 2005 haha yeah it did make me laugh when u said you were older cause your in school!! over here we leave school at 16 haha! My boyfriend is 2 and a half hours drive away. Not far really I guess. Whereabbouts in america do you live? id love to live in america.. one day... yeah my education is free, is yours not? i have to borrow loans and stuff so im in huge debt but i'll worry about that when i graduate!
HoldOn Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 Well, I live near Chicago, but don't tell anyone! No, we have to pay for our school. Law school is about $30,000 per year for private school and $15,000 for public school. So that's a huge amount of debt even without living expenses. My bf also lives 2.5 hours away. We see eachother 3 weekends out of 4. Can you see your bf more often than every two weeks? I'm going crazy right now too because I haven't talked to him since Thursday. I'm sure he'll call today, but I'm getting a little upset. Anyway, I'm just chalking it up to clueless guy behavior. Oh well. We've all got our problems, huh?
Author chubachoop Posted May 1, 2005 Author Posted May 1, 2005 Jeez that is alot of money, maybe Im glad i live in England after all!! I do sometimes see my boyfriend more than every two weeks. We dont have a set schedule cause he works funny hours and im really busy at university. We havent yet gone more than two weeks though without seeing each other. Yeah dont worry bout your boyfriend not calling since thursday. i think all guys are the same when it comes to calling. I was a bit upset recently about mine not calling me as often as i liked. I think when guys are secure in there relationship, they dont feel the need that us girls feel to be in constant contact. I ussually hear from him every two days and the only one of my boyfriends that called me every day was my first and he was also the only one I nagged and nagged about calling so I guess thats the only reason he called!
HoldOn Posted May 1, 2005 Posted May 1, 2005 Yeah, I mean we have a very stable relationship. But when we haven't talked in three days, it's like a bell goes off in my head! Oh well, I'm not going to nag him about it, cuz I am moving in with him in 2 weeks. I'll give him his space while I still can.
Author chubachoop Posted May 1, 2005 Author Posted May 1, 2005 yeah Im the same I guess its just women for ya! I get upset after 2 days so your much better than me anyway!!
Author chubachoop Posted May 2, 2005 Author Posted May 2, 2005 Yey!! hmm.... mine hasnt called since friday.......
Author chubachoop Posted May 2, 2005 Author Posted May 2, 2005 yeah i know. Probably today. hes so predictable haha
Skeered Posted May 2, 2005 Posted May 2, 2005 K so what do you do to make things easier when your boyfriend is 2200 miles away...I don't get to see him at all but talk to him nightly...it's sooooooo hard to not be lonely...I know that we are both workin toward a common goal right now of him moving out here to be with me and my daughter since I can't move because my XH won't allow me to leave the state. So we talk on the phone nightly and lots on the weekends and try to be as much together as we can but I tell you what when I hang up the phone at the end of the night and go to bed I feel so lonely... So what do I do with that..lol
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