renaissance_2589 Posted June 23, 2015 Posted June 23, 2015 My ex broke up with me, about three weeks ago. We were together for nearly three years, lived together and practically spent every waking minute together. We were so close, I can't even describe how close. But we had arguments, lots of them, over silly things. We had a break before and he took me back, I was trying to fix things, this was in March, then three weeks ago he told me it was over. He said we didn't work. I packed my things and moved to my mum's. After a week of him just saying he missed me, and the cat missed me, how it was lonely without me and other cutesy crap messages, I went back for an ultimatum. He told me he hadn't changed his mind, we were still over. I asked him if he loved me, he said he 'thinks so'. I found he had been talking to some other woman on the latop, asking her for dirty pics, sending them. I confronted him, devastated, he told me he had never met her and didn't physically cheat on me and this all happened when we weren't together. So I blew up and he left to go to a family member's house. This was last Monday, I haven't heard from him since. He did say before he left he missed me and thinks he still loves me and that we both need the space to see if we come back together. He said he wouldn't give me any false hope like the last time, and his family member confirmed that. Now this is no contact, is he feeling hurt? He told me before we went NC that he cries and misses me. SO WHY DOES HE NOT CONTACT ME, COME TO THE HOUSE AND FIX IT ALL after all he has done I love him so much and i would take him back and work on it. I do not accept it is over, it is not over! We were each others soul mates, you have no idea how close and after all we were through together, yes we argued but we had amazing times. I feel if he doesn't give us one more chance he would never know how we could make it work and be in love once more... I feel he is the one for me and to even think of life without him crushes me.. please help me...
mightycpa Posted June 24, 2015 Posted June 24, 2015 ...he told me it was over. He said we didn't work. I packed my things and moved to my mum's. After a week of him just saying he missed me, and the cat missed me, how it was lonely without me and other cutesy crap messages, I went back for an ultimatum. He told me he hadn't changed his mind, we were still over. I asked him if he loved me, he said he 'thinks so'. I found he had been talking to some other woman on the latop, asking her for dirty pics, sending them. I confronted him, devastated, he told me he had never met her and didn't physically cheat on me and this all happened when we weren't together. So I blew up and he left to go to a family member's house. This was last Monday, I haven't heard from him since. That sounds dysfunctional and angry and all sorts of bad things to me. I can't imagine what each of you is clinging to. I am mystified by the part where you're broken up, you've moved out, you come back but do not reconcile and then you explode on him for doing his own thing. I am doubly mystified by his apologetic and "not guilty by reason of technicality" reaction. He should have told you to step off, that it was none of your business what he does! Or did I miss a reconciliation in there somewhere? Dysfunctional. Leave it behind, and try again with somebody new. 1
Author renaissance_2589 Posted June 24, 2015 Author Posted June 24, 2015 I didn't word it too well. Right, This whole sending of pictures and chatting, although it was dirty or sexting and nothing happened, it had been going on for months. Ie he did it when we were back together. From the first break it has been going on even when we got back. Point being when we broke up after the break, he was saying he missed me and talking every day in this sort of language while he was also talking to her. The whole point of the breakup was for space and he kept saying he was thinking but he really missed me so after I week I came back and demanded to know what was going on which was when I found out he had been messaging this girl back from when we were together. Now we are fully broken up, do you think the lack of contact will work? I know I am portraying me and him in a bad light but we were perfect together until the end...
Satu Posted June 24, 2015 Posted June 24, 2015 I wouldn't even consider staying in a relationship where arguments are a frequent event. If you can't get along peaceably the relationship has little merit.
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