0range33 Posted June 23, 2015 Posted June 23, 2015 Long story short I've known a girl about 12 years and we have always stayed in contact. We dated 2 1/2 years ago but dropped me like a stone after three months. Got back in touch in November. Sweet girl for 2 months then treated me like dirt for the next 4 months. Now she is trying to get back with me again. I will never take her back. Have you girls ever treated someone awful and then tried to get back with him? Have you gents ever treated her like a princess only to get walked over and they keep coming back? Why do women do this? It's like a man has treated them like no other. They don't know how to handle it, treat us like crap and run away. Then want back in. Can anyone please help me! FYI I have met an amazing girl in the mean time.
blueskyday Posted June 23, 2015 Posted June 23, 2015 (edited) OOh forget about her! She has had two chances and blown them. Don't give her another one. Instead, focus on your new girl. As for the reason for the first girl's behavior, who knows? It only matters that she treated you badly TWICE. This exact situation has happened to me, with a guy coming back for thirds. No thanks. I chalked his behavior up to a few possibilities: 1. He didn't like me enough to work things out, and only came back when he was lonely or bored. Then bailed because, after a while, there wasn't enough to compel him to stay, as before. 2. He was a narcissist who had psychological problems and would get close, then bail. Classic idealization and subsequent devaluation of a love object. They put you on a pedestal at first, then knock you down and consider you worthless. 3. He was a player who didn't want a relationship and faked being a nice guy to get some sex. 4. He was a nice guy who didnt know what he wanted and acted badly due to an inner conflict of needs. The bottom line is we don't need to know what's behind their behavior. Their behavior, on the face of it, is unacceptable. Next! Don't look back, go no contact with the serial break up artist, and please enjoy the new girl and the fresh clean slate you have! �� Edited June 23, 2015 by blueskyday 2
toscaroscura Posted June 23, 2015 Posted June 23, 2015 Men do this too, treat a girl like crap, call her up later and rope her in. I think it works because, no one is terrible 24/7. Maybe, that person who treats you like crap sometimes treats you amazing, and when they do, you feel like a million dollars! So you take them back, hoping to recapture that amazing feeling and live happily ever after. Who knows why people treat others like crap. I think, for the most part, people do it without thinking much about anyone's feelings but their own. They are filling some kind of need, or they are just supremely selfish. It's best to recognize them for what they are and move on without them. 1
Author 0range33 Posted June 24, 2015 Author Posted June 24, 2015 I'm finding it extremely difficult to understand her actions. How many bad relationships before she settles down with a good guy? Do some women never settle down? Do some women sabotage there own relationships without even realising it.
stillafool Posted June 24, 2015 Posted June 24, 2015 Some women run hard until they run out. Then and only then do they search for someone to marry and settle down. They always want their single life back but are too old and tired to get it back.
TaraMaiden2 Posted June 24, 2015 Posted June 24, 2015 I'm finding it extremely difficult to understand her actions. You don't need to. All you need to do is to ignore her, block her and have nothing ever to do with her, ever again. How many bad relationships before she settles down with a good guy?Who cares?! Her problem, not yours! Do some women never settle down? Do some men never settle down? Do some women sabotage there own relationships without even realising it. Of course. Precisely as some men sabotage THEIR own relationships without even realising it. Just because you had a bad experience with this ex don't (1) presume many women are like this or (2) assume that naturally, no man would EVER behave in the same way.
Redhead14 Posted June 24, 2015 Posted June 24, 2015 Long story short I've known a girl about 12 years and we have always stayed in contact. We dated 2 1/2 years ago but dropped me like a stone after three months. Got back in touch in November. Sweet girl for 2 months then treated me like dirt for the next 4 months. Now she is trying to get back with me again. I will never take her back. Have you girls ever treated someone awful and then tried to get back with him? Have you gents ever treated her like a princess only to get walked over and they keep coming back? Why do women do this? It's like a man has treated them like no other. They don't know how to handle it, treat us like crap and run away. Then want back in. Can anyone please help me! FYI I have met an amazing girl in the mean time. They come back because all the other guys they treated like **** and tried to get back with passed on them too. Don't be a doormat. Keep moving, you're doing fine! I've never treated a man like crap, even if they'd treated me like crap. I always left a dating scenario with dignity and respect for myself. Those women have no dignity or respect for anyone.
Dork Vader Posted June 24, 2015 Posted June 24, 2015 This happens for both sexes. Yes I have been in your position before. The simple truth is she won't change. Who know's why she is treating you like dirt. Perhaps her attraction too you fades. Perhaps it stems from a maturity issue, mental issues or who knows what.. I have noticed though that if you are too nice it does lead too one getting walked on. There is a difference between being a nice guy and treating a woman like a Princess and letting a person walk on you. Treating a woman right is opening doors for her, buying dinner, complimenting her, going out of your way to make her feel special.. Letting her walk on you is.. You buying her dinner then her taking off too hang out with her friends. You being on demand for her.. yet her only seeing you when it is convenient for HER. Her going too a party with a group of friends both male and female.. And you not being invited.. You have too stand up for yourself you have to set boundaries other wise people will take advantage of you.
Popsicle Posted June 24, 2015 Posted June 24, 2015 It's great that you won't take her back. Congrats on having balls.
TaraMaiden2 Posted June 24, 2015 Posted June 24, 2015 It's great that you won't take her back. Congrats on having balls. He won't take her back because he now has a new GF.. I am not sure he wouldn't take her back, if he was still single....
Author 0range33 Posted June 24, 2015 Author Posted June 24, 2015 It's such a shame. I love that girl so much. Shes just so toxic. One thing I know is no one will ever treat her how I did. That will eat her up for years. 1
TaraMaiden2 Posted June 24, 2015 Posted June 24, 2015 It's such a shame. I love that girl so much. Shes just so toxic. One thing I know is no one will ever treat her how I did. That will eat her up for years. Providing you can now drop this and not let it eat at YOU. You owe it to your current GF to not give it another second's thought....
Author 0range33 Posted June 24, 2015 Author Posted June 24, 2015 I do Give her my all. I just had to unload these questions. I didnt understand her actions. I've never had problems with women before this point and was nice to discuss is.
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