beowulf44 Posted June 22, 2015 Posted June 22, 2015 So yeah. She ended our relationship in November. After a weird period in which we still tried seeing each other every other week (it was ****ty), we stopped hanging out altogether in January. For the month of February, we didn't speak at all. Then in March, we started hanging out again, and it was nice. We both enjoyed it alot, and we've been seeing each other more since (though still not "frequently"... but when we do, it is fun, and we usually have sex). For whats its worth, we have both changed alot of the issues that were previously impacting our former relationship. However, we both are kind of reluctant to jump back into relationship because we are just afraid things will go down the same exact path (we both have big big shields up that are just not coming 100% down), but we also acknowledge things can't continue in this "grey area" forever. Has anyone been here before? What ended up happening? Or, if you haven't, what do you guys advise doing?
JJCaliGirl Posted June 22, 2015 Posted June 22, 2015 I recently went through this with an ex, and miscommunication was what killed it the second time around. Being cautious was my issue the first time around and his the second time. We didn't communicate what we were expecting nor did he fully explain what he was currently going through. Where I thought we were starting over, he didn't and I think he ultimately wanted to hurt me based on several statements. I really wish he was honest with me from the get-go because it would've made me approach our second attempt differently, and who knows, we may still be together tonight. Being cautious is perfectly fine, but at least communicate with each other about what your thoughts and feelings are. Are you both seeing other people while exploring this or are you "exclusive" at this point? Don't feel pressured to put labels on it though. If that is one thing that frightens you both, let it happen naturally and not be pressured by a defined milestone like "we've been exclusive for 2 months, we need to be my boyfriend/girlfriend now." Best of luck with you and this girl!
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