Glitterbunny Posted June 21, 2015 Posted June 21, 2015 So my boyfriend of 4.5 years dumped me just after new year. We lived together and I have had to moved back in with my parents. He is now living somewhere else and has a new girlfriend. His new girlfriend is someone I know who I did not like at all, he is aware of this and aware of the reasons why. It's hard knowing he is with her because I don't understand why he would be attracted to her knowing what she did to me. She isn't particularly attractive either but does lay sex on a plate for anyone. He is also working with her so they are spending ALOT of time together. Although I am starting to realise our relationship probably wasn't the best I was so happy at the time. It hurts a lot that she's with this other girl as well. Not the fact he's with someone else but more for who it is. I'm not sure what I'm trying to ask here but I think about him all the time, from when I wake up to when I go to bed. Everything reminds me of him and I don't know what to do. I'm guessing I'm asking if this is normal to still be like this after 6months, almost 7months. People tell me all the time to distract myself but it's hard to do that. When I try to do something new I'm aware that I'm doing it to distract myself, which then in turn leads me to thinking about my ex. Has anoyone been in this position before (I'm aware many people have). How did you get over you ex? How long did it take? Thanks for any help xxx
mrs rubble Posted June 21, 2015 Posted June 21, 2015 How long does it take to get over a relationship is like asking how long a piece of string is!! I know the last time I was stuck in a rut, thinking contantly of my recent break-up, I snapped out of it all of a sudden after watching a football game on TV one day. I noticed how lovely the players thighs were, and just like magic I had a new obsession. (My ex had awful legs!)
smackie9 Posted June 21, 2015 Posted June 21, 2015 Maybe you are codependent. Codependency make you feel you have no life without this relationship, and that it was your whole life. In order to feel normal, you hang onto his memory to get through the day. It's a vicious cycle, and in order to stop it is to realize you don,t need him, and that you are your own person.....you need to love yourself again, instead of feeling like you failed, let him and yourself down. There was nothing you could do any different. Your relationship ran it's course, and he wanted to move on. Yes it's a blow to the ego seeing him with someone you know, but the reality of it is, if it wasn't her it would have been someone else anyways. Is it not better to not be with someone who doesn't want to be with you? There is someone out there that will make you happier than he ever did. I think if you just see it for what it is, you will be able to finally let go. Start dating again, go have fun.....life is too short to be wasting your time fretting over something that is done. You have to tell yourself you are better than this, and you have a life to live.
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