AJHamilton Posted June 21, 2015 Posted June 21, 2015 My fiancée of 7 years left me yesterday. I was home laying on the couch, noticed a van pull up didn't look like a moving van had no stickers nothing, thought it might be my landlords workers at the house to do something. Then I see a mutual friend drive by and stop to talk to whoever it was. Couldn't see them they were standing on the opposite side of the van. All of a sudden my mom pulls up as well and here comes my fiancée, my mom, and one of my fiancées friends walking up and I knew. In a matter of a few hours or less she had all her things packed up and gone. She had called my mom to come down because she thought I might try to hurt myself, or go ballistic. No warning signs, nothing. If anything even the night before she left me it was I love you and holding each other in bed. We even had sex two nights ago after not having sex for a long time and it was her that wanted it. I wanted to go to sleep but she was almost throwing a fit I wasn't in the mood. "This is my home I'm not going anywhere", "I'm not leaving". That's all I've heard then boom, slapped in the face. The kicker is that a week ago she supported my decision to quit a job I absolutely hated and said she could tell i was miserable. Just to be out activity looking she said. I've always been a hard worker, always held a job, but this job was unbearable but had I known she was leaving I would've sucked it up until I found something else! I should have done that anyway but she insisted she supported my decision. So now I'm alone, jobless (although I know I can get another), and wondering what I'm gonna do. Can I afford it here? I can't really afford to move either. Afraid I'm going to end up in a homeless shelter. Talk about losing everything including your pride. When I was contemplating quitting my job that would've been a great time to say "I'm leaving". Last night I had a few beers was trying to stay positive. Today as I wake up I feel like it's a bad dream. She did this to me once before. I worked 3rd shift. Went to work like everything was ok. Kissed me goodbye said she loved me. I come home the next morning to a half empty house. I found an apartment and was doing just fine on my own when she decided we move together and get back together and I missed her so much, I bit. Oh how I regret that. Because a little over a year later the exact same thing happens to me. Only this time I have no job. I don't want to get back together with her like before I am so bitter and angry at how she could've done it this way after leading me on that everything was ok. If we had made a plan a parted on good terms I would've been upset, but what would I do? Hurt myself? No. Hurt her? No way. Her kids aren't mine but there are two and I've been with them since they've been in diapers so I also have lost them, who are now 8 and 9. This was my family. Now they're gone. I'm scared, worried, and alone. Angry, sad, hurt, but not as much as the last break up. I'm mostly worried about myself as opposed to her. My dog of 13 years died in January, I always had her to worry about. I miss her so much, only this time I'm glad I only have to worry about myself because who knows where I'll end up. My mom is being wonderful but she and her husband aren't going to offer for me to come stay with them and I don't blame them. Just get a job, that's my goal #1 and figure it out from there. I asked God, if he's got something for me in this life, he better get to showing it to me because part of me wants to give up. I just think the way she left me is brutal I could never do that to someone I even at the very least cared about.
EgoJoe Posted June 21, 2015 Posted June 21, 2015 You now have a job, 12 hours a day, seven days a week. That job is to find employment. Any down time and you will fall, push hard right now.
Fleur de cactus Posted June 21, 2015 Posted June 21, 2015 Sorry AJ, It is hard right now, since all bad things seemed coming together. I hope you will find a job soon. Just don't give up, keep searching. That woman is a heart breaker. It seems she likes to hurt you. She left and after that you are settled she came back to you. Now she knows you do not have a job she decided to leave. I think she is one those kind of people who only be friends in good time and run quickly when they see you are in difficulties. But when you talked to her or your mother, what explanation did she gives?
NoLeafClover Posted June 21, 2015 Posted June 21, 2015 ThAt is horrible. Do not plan on contacting her ever again. Let her leave with her misery. People that do stuff like that are heartless. I had a coworker who did to her ex as well. All nice and cute with him and once he left for work, she called her mom and sister to help move her stuff out. The guy had no idea unil he came home to an empty house. Forgot people like this...They are backstabbers and heartless 1
grokcahsevol Posted June 21, 2015 Posted June 21, 2015 I'm so sorry to hear this My g/f of 9 years just left me.. it's been tough! I'm so lost and have no idea what to do. I'm glad I found these forums but I also started watching this guy on youtube (actually made me laugh!) https://www.youtube.com/user/coachcoreywayne I just started reading his book as well.. hopefully with these resources I'll be able to better cope and maybe it will help you as well. Maybe, instead of looking for a job.. start a business? I quit my job a few months ago and lived off of some money and now trying to start a business to keep my mind busy and hopefully off of her.
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