Gaeta Posted June 18, 2015 Posted June 18, 2015 And, in one of my last posts, I said she could have made a suggestion about where to meet if he didn't know a place. If he dodged that, that would have been another "sign". She didn't because this guy's first idea was to take her to an event where he was hosting so she would have spent most of her time in a crowd of stranger with him doing his thing up front. She declined that and he came up with this half hearted invitation how about I take you to a real restaurant with wine. I got 4h12 here OP did you hear from him?
Redhead14 Posted June 18, 2015 Posted June 18, 2015 Yes, it's HIS invitation and SHE accepted it. The responsibility is mutual now in terms of details and needed to be addressed right then and there. She let him get off the phone without clarity. He didn't tell her he'd call, so it's a grey area. That's both their problem. She could have said, OK, get back to me by X day and time with the place. And, then the ball would still be in his court. Right now, it's anybody's court. And, in one of my last posts, I said she could have made a suggestion about where to meet if he didn't know a place. If he dodged that, that would have been another "sign". Leaving any element of an invitation "open" allows THEM flexibility. She's still "stuck" waiting.
Gary S Posted June 18, 2015 Posted June 18, 2015 Katie, I did not mean to discount anything you said, if I did, my apologies. Sometimes I skim the posts and miss things. You are one of my favorites here, and a brilliant lady, always The bottom line is, he cut the call short before setting a place - without a place, there can't be any real date. I would change his name in your phone to "telemarketer", cut contact and ignore any calls from that number, and delete any texts unread. And leave tonight open for other plans. Time to move on to the next guy. Part of smart dating is using your intuition to see these things ahead of time, and break things off first to reduce the chance of rejection, man's (and woman's) worst fear. He who gets out first gets to exercise their own free will and feels better about the whole deal. When the love plane is going down, there is a only one parachute. People with integrity who want to see you make firm date plans. Period. Don't settle for anything less. 2
Redhead14 Posted June 18, 2015 Posted June 18, 2015 She didn't because this guy's first idea was to take her to an event where he was hosting so she would have spent most of her time in a crowd of stranger with him doing his thing up front. She declined that and he came up with this half hearted invitation how about I take you to a real restaurant with wine. I got 4h12 here OP did you hear from him? Oh, this is that one? I wish posters would keep follow up questions in the same thread I kinda was "liking" it. I didn't realize that the details weren't firmed up. Really, in this case, yeah, I'd have called him. He heard her when she told him that her preference was one on one and he came back to set that up. I'd give him a little slack at least.
katiegrl Posted June 18, 2015 Posted June 18, 2015 Katie, I did not mean to discount anything you said, if I did, my apologies. Sometimes I skim the posts and miss things. You are one of my favorites here, and a brilliant lady, always Okie, in that case you are forgiven haha. And bunnies right back at ya... (For some reason can't attach the bunny emoji from my office computer) But :) :) Love ya too! 1
Author Bobbi7 Posted June 18, 2015 Author Posted June 18, 2015 She didn't because this guy's first idea was to take her to an event where he was hosting so she would have spent most of her time in a crowd of stranger with him doing his thing up front. She declined that and he came up with this half hearted invitation how about I take you to a real restaurant with wine. I got 4h12 here OP did you hear from him? No, he never contacted me, its already 4:40pm. I guess he figured why is he going to spend some money on me when he's hosting/attending 3 different happy hours tomorrow where there's a 100% chance he's going to be talking to several hot women scantily clad. So, was this my fault that I didn't want to go to his happy hour and preferred a one on one date? I mean, its a dating site not a meetup.com.
Author Bobbi7 Posted June 18, 2015 Author Posted June 18, 2015 Well, 5:30pm and my date never happened!
Gaeta Posted June 18, 2015 Posted June 18, 2015 No, he never contacted me, its already 4:40pm. I guess he figured why is he going to spend some money on me when he's hosting/attending 3 different happy hours tomorrow where there's a 100% chance he's going to be talking to several hot women scantily clad. So, was this my fault that I didn't want to go to his happy hour and preferred a one on one date? I mean, its a dating site not a meetup.com. No dear, it's not your fault in any way. I didn't like this guy from the very beginning. I am sorry he wasted your time. Ignore him from now on and move to next.
Author Bobbi7 Posted June 19, 2015 Author Posted June 19, 2015 No dear, it's not your fault in any way. I didn't like this guy from the very beginning. I am sorry he wasted your time. Ignore him from now on and move to next. Yeah. Happy Hour didn't even make sense to me, he's not going to be holding my hand through out the night while he's hosting and most likely not going to be introducing me as his "date." What did he expect? That I was going to mingle with strangers?
Gaeta Posted June 19, 2015 Posted June 19, 2015 Yeah. Happy Hour didn't even make sense to me, he's not going to be holding my hand through out the night while he's hosting and most likely not going to be introducing me as his "date." What did he expect? That I was going to mingle with strangers? When someone makes such an invitation for a first meet you can tell their level of involvement is low. Then when you rejected it he went into inviting you for a full blown dinner with wine. It was a knee reaction on his part to save his face. He had no intention of booking the dinner. If he contacts you and says he didn't hear from you, don't buy it.
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