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Ex viewed me on Match.com


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Posted

More of a venting post, so bear with me...

 

We've been split up for almost 3 months and have been NC for a month, then a month and a half.

 

Just when I'm starting to feel good about myself and my progress, I signed up for a Match.com account to get some confidence back. Wanted to see what women were in my area. After getting some hits, I decided to pay for a month of the service to possibly get some dates. I signed up a couple days ago....

 

So today, who do I see viewing my profile? Her.....

 

Why.....I don't get it. We had a tumultuous relationship where it was never going to work. I'm too laid back and she's way too Type A. Why does she need to check up on me especially when she lives two houses down?

 

I'm already on an emotional roller coaster with starting a new job in a week and a half. Why now....I'm pissed

Posted
More of a venting post, so bear with me...

 

We've been split up for almost 3 months and have been NC for a month, then a month and a half.

 

Just when I'm starting to feel good about myself and my progress, I signed up for a Match.com account to get some confidence back. Wanted to see what women were in my area. After getting some hits, I decided to pay for a month of the service to possibly get some dates. I signed up a couple days ago....

 

So today, who do I see viewing my profile? Her.....

 

Why.....I don't get it. We had a tumultuous relationship where it was never going to work. I'm too laid back and she's way too Type A. Why does she need to check up on me especially when she lives two houses down?

 

I'm already on an emotional roller coaster with starting a new job in a week and a half. Why now....I'm pissed

 

It was just a peek probably done out of curiosity. Nothing to be worried about.

Posted
It was just a peek probably done out of curiosity. Nothing to be worried about.

 

This.^^^^^

Posted
It was just a peek probably done out of curiosity. Nothing to be worried about.

 

Gotta agree, no biggie... Don't make a mountain out of a mole hill.

 

You're moving on, her thoughts and actions are none of your concern now. If anything it's a good thing, show's her how really you don't care that much about her and moving on, even if you do.

 

Look after you, think of you, care for you, have fun.

 

Good luck.

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Posted
It was just a peek probably done out of curiosity. Nothing to be worried about.

 

You're right. Unfortunately it wasn't the best timing as I feel like I'm back to square one when we split.

 

Back to the drawing board.

Posted
You're right. Unfortunately it wasn't the best timing as I feel like I'm back to square one when we split.

 

Back to the drawing board.

 

You're ALLOWING this line of thinking. It should have no impact on you moving forward. People run into ex's on dating sites all the time. They want to move on as well.

 

 

Block her on Match. There's a way to do it there. Then, keep doing what you're doing. Find your next great relationship.

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Posted
You're ALLOWING this line of thinking. It should have no impact on you moving forward. People run into ex's on dating sites all the time. They want to move on as well.

 

 

Block her on Match. There's a way to do it there. Then, keep doing what you're doing. Find your next great relationship.

 

I was just caught off guard. I can understand if she was doing it to block me but that didn't happen. But you're absolutely right that I am allowing this to happen as I still deeply care about her and love her.

Posted
Unfortunately it wasn't the best timing as I feel like I'm back to square one when we split.

 

Back to the drawing board.

Removing everything out of site is not the same as processing your emotions. If you feel the same as when you split it is a sign that you need to work more on grieving. Three months isn't long. Give yourself some time.

  • Like 1
Posted

I'm coming up on 3 months it isn't long at all but it's hell of a lot better than month one .. I'm still broken but at least I can start to see the light

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Posted
Removing everything out of site is not the same as processing your emotions. If you feel the same as when you split it is a sign that you need to work more on grieving. Three months isn't long. Give yourself some time.

 

I agree I need more time. I wasn't expecting it to affect me this much. I signed up for online dating to see if I was ready but obviously I'm not.

Posted
I agree I need more time. I wasn't expecting it to affect me this much. I signed up for online dating to see if I was ready but obviously I'm not.

Sometimes we need to experience such things to see where we are :)

  • Like 1
Posted

You are still going through the stages of lose. Im also coming up to 3 months. I still grieve here and there but not as much as i did in the first few weeks. Just because you have a few sunny days doesnt mean your 100% ready to put yourself back out there again. All she had to do was view your profile and it completly upset you. You need more time to heal. Good luck

  • Like 1
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Posted

Here's another twist....my Gmail account just had unauthorized access from an iPhone. 99% sure it has nothing to do with anything, but it's pretty ironic...what the hell

Posted
Removing everything out of site is not the same as processing your emotions. If you feel the same as when you split it is a sign that you need to work more on grieving. Three months isn't long. Give yourself some time.

 

Its has been almost 6 months for me and I'm still grieving. Give yourself.more time.

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