misspond Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 Seriously? How hard is it to get a coffee date? Last night for the first time ever on OLD a nice looking man (red flag one, heavy on the filters, looks like he's a bit into himself), in my preferred age range so a bit older than me sent me a, (red flag two?) "Hello :)" message. His profile was sparse but not empty so I figured I'd shoot a, "Hi, how are you?" back. To be honest it makes a change from messages from 20-somethings and married men. Nice few messages back and forth and then he says, "So how about we meet up then misspond? It's the only way to see if there's chemistry?" I agree, and we set a date and time (lunchtime later this week), although as yet no place (red flag 3?) and he suggests a quick phone call first. Numbers are exchanged, brief bit of texting, he'll "Call tonight, if not tonight then deffo tomorrow." (Red flag 4?) No call last night, and then this morning at 11am I get a "Morning!" message. Personally I dislike those because we've not met yet so red flag 5? I couldn't respond because of work - I work with vulnerable people and phone use is strictly prohibited, so I didn't even see the message until I got out of work. Once I did see it though I sent him a quick, "Hi, wasn't ignoring you, just can't use phone at work. If you'd still like to call for a quick chat tonight then I'm free from 8.30pm" At just before 8.30pm I get, "Sorry, can't call, I'm with my brother. Tomorrow?" Honestly. I despair! Well, not really despair but my eyes are rolling pretty hard I can tell you. Maybe I'm just jaded 1
rester Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 I thought you were being a little too hard on the guy until he flaked out on the phone call the second night. You already have a time and day set for the coffee date, though, so maybe just see how the phone call goes and then decide if you still want to meet him.
Author misspond Posted June 16, 2015 Author Posted June 16, 2015 I thought you were being a little too hard on the guy until he flaked out on the phone call the second night. You already have a time and day set for the coffee date, though, so maybe just see how the phone call goes and then decide if you still want to meet him. That's true, I'll confess I maybe am being a little too hard on him already. I'll wait and see if he calls because if he doesn't then, too bad, and if he does? Well, a decision can be made by either party then to either go ahead or cancel.
Author misspond Posted June 17, 2015 Author Posted June 17, 2015 Oh! He just called and sounded really nice, easy to chat to and funny, sounds a bit quirky like me. All set for coffee tomorrow lunchtime. 3
Gaeta Posted June 17, 2015 Posted June 17, 2015 Good stuff!! Good luck with the date. Often I got nice surprises, the man was kind of off online then in real he was very social, articulate, etc.
Author misspond Posted June 17, 2015 Author Posted June 17, 2015 I'm naturally quite wary really, and to be honest his photos make him look like he loves himself, but he didn't come across that way on the phone, he was funny interesting and chatty. So we'll see. It's rare I get as far as coffee dates even, so onwards and upwards. 1
Author misspond Posted June 18, 2015 Author Posted June 18, 2015 Well, the red flag was the photos. He looked nothing like his heavily filtered and angled photos (so it's not just women who play that trick). He was and easy to talk to but in the end he just wasn't my type physically. I also wasn't too keen (understatement) on the way he grabbed me and stuck his tongue in my mouth after he'd walked me back to my car. Apparently he likes to kiss goodbye. This was a 52 year old man folks.
Author misspond Posted June 18, 2015 Author Posted June 18, 2015 (edited) .......... Edited June 18, 2015 by misspond Double post
Author misspond Posted June 18, 2015 Author Posted June 18, 2015 He was looking for the lime and soda he'd bought me, well, it is sunny here in the UK.
jen1447 Posted June 18, 2015 Posted June 18, 2015 ^ That's funny ....did he comment that it tasted good? I've had guys get too forward with that before who would receive a very gentle knee to the testicles to back them down.
Author misspond Posted June 18, 2015 Author Posted June 18, 2015 Haha! I pushed him away and said, "F*ck right off." Got in my car and got the hell out of dodge. I should have kneed him or punched him in the throat.
empresario Posted June 18, 2015 Posted June 18, 2015 You sound quite cheeky! That's a word of your people, right? Good on ya tellin' that chap to bugger off. Alright, I'm sorry. But for real, I'm sure men and women alike all take advantage of online dating to look better than they are. As I say...everyone can take one good photo. Sometimes even two. But you can't fake real life. I mean, you could try. But it would be odd when you crouch down and bend your head towards your date to get the 'above angle' thing going for an hour.
Author misspond Posted June 18, 2015 Author Posted June 18, 2015 Of course I did that! You don't get to be almost half a hundred years old and not learn how to be sociable/tell someone where to get off. I've got both a daughter and a son to bring up here too, so I need to walk the talk. And thanks for the compliment Jen 1
Author misspond Posted June 18, 2015 Author Posted June 18, 2015 (edited) You sound quite cheeky! That's a word of your people, right? Good on ya tellin' that chap to bugger off. Alright, I'm sorry. But for real, I'm sure men and women alike all take advantage of online dating to look better than they are. As I say...everyone can take one good photo. Sometimes even two. But you can't fake real life. I mean, you could try. But it would be odd when you crouch down and bend your head towards your date to get the 'above angle' thing going for an hour. I'm actually quite polite But I am far from unable to stand up for myself. And the photos I have up here on LS are the ones I have on OLD look like me (including the one with my back showing from a dance performance, that got too much "negative" attention, which I removed a while ago). I'm who I am, a bit frowny, look good with a bit of make-up and a smile. All from the last 6 months and tagged with the appropriate month and year. Marketing schmarketing. Seriously, this dude in his photos looked slim and well put together and even on the phone he said he'd taken the pics in December last year. Yeah, right. December 2000 I reckon. IRL he was like Gru from Despicable Me. Without the charm. I mean to be fair I could talk to him easily but he kept touching me and "inviting" me to flirt with him. Nope. Nope nope nope. Maybe personality will trump physical as i know it has done for some of my friends. Nope. Not when you stick your tongue down my throat. Edited June 18, 2015 by misspond
empresario Posted June 18, 2015 Posted June 18, 2015 I'm actually quite polite But I am far from unable to stand up for myself. And the photos I have up here on LS are the ones I have on OLD (not the one with my back showing from a dance performance, that got too much "negative" attention). All from the last 6 months and tagged with the appropriate month and year. Marketing schmarketing. Seriously, this dude in his photos looked slim and well put together and even on the phone he said he'd taken the pics in December last year. Yeah, right. December 2000 I reckon. IRL he was like Gru from Despicable Me. Without the charm. I mean to be fair I could talk to him easily but he kept touching me and "inviting" me to flirt with him. Nope. Nope nope nope. Maybe personality will trump physical as i know it has done for some of my friends. Nope. Not when you stick your tongue down my throat. Haha I love your 'voice' online. Funny gal. Honesty is the best policy when OLD. I feel like most people expect the person not to notice when they use their senior pictures on their profile...and they're 35. Full disclosure, my photo is from January of 2014 .
Author misspond Posted June 18, 2015 Author Posted June 18, 2015 Haha I love your 'voice' online. Funny gal. Honesty is the best policy when OLD. I feel like most people expect the person not to notice when they use their senior pictures on their profile...and they're 35. Full disclosure, my photo is from January of 2014 . I'm 48. It's both a curse and a blessing
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