missymisda Posted June 15, 2015 Posted June 15, 2015 So I was dating two guys. One of them (rob) was really fun and easy-going and the other (john) was very successful and from a politically connected family. I made the mistake of telling John I broke up with Rob and wanted to be just with him. I broke up with him soon after telling him I was with Rob first and it was only fair to stay with Rob. That's when the nightmare started. John found Rob's email and sent him dirty pics I sent along with tons of texts telling him I loved him. The trouble didn't end there. Two weeks later, John texted me asking for his diamond jewelry back. I ignored him because those are gifts and gifts aren't returned. He told me I would end up paying back 10x what I refused to give him back and never contacted me again. Soon after, the IRS sent me an audit and I had investigations opened on my business from a few different state departments. I'm now at the point where the legal trouble is overwhelming and every few weeks, a new investigation is opened. What am I supposed to do at this point? He is hell bent on revenge. I'm really sorry that I got involved with two people but it seems like he is deliberately causing me financial damage by using his family's business partners in the state government. I don't have any interest in talking to him but I want him to stop. What can I do? Attorneys are asking for insane amounts of money and the police say no crime was committed for a restraining order or to have him arrested. Please tell me what to do?
Jessie1231 Posted June 15, 2015 Posted June 15, 2015 Why don't you just give him the jewelry back? Since you broke up with him I'm sure it has no sentimental value. Just give it back and maybe he will go away. 1
Taramere Posted June 15, 2015 Posted June 15, 2015 Soon after, the IRS sent me an audit and I had investigations opened on my business from a few different state departments. I'm now at the point where the legal trouble is overwhelming and every few weeks, a new investigation is opened. What am I supposed to do at this point? He is hell bent on revenge. I'm really sorry that I got involved with two people but it seems like he is deliberately causing me financial damage by using his family's business partners in the state government. I don't have any interest in talking to him but I want him to stop. What can I do? Attorneys are asking for insane amounts of money and the police say no crime was committed for a restraining order or to have him arrested. Please tell me what to do? What reasons have the IRS given for auditing you?
Author missymisda Posted June 15, 2015 Author Posted June 15, 2015 What reasons have the IRS given for auditing you? unreported income / undeclared income
Author missymisda Posted June 15, 2015 Author Posted June 15, 2015 (edited) Why don't you just give him the jewelry back? Since you broke up with him I'm sure it has no sentimental value. Just give it back and maybe he will go away. They are very fancy pieces. totaling over 20 cts. Some belonging to a famous deceased artist. I'd say 40-50k in value If I give that back, I lose that too and I don't know if he will stop there. He said he'd give me one chance to return the jewelry and no problems with happen. The next day, he said have it your way. You'll pay back 10x what you refuse to give me back. Edited June 15, 2015 by missymisda
Taramere Posted June 15, 2015 Posted June 15, 2015 unreported income / undeclared income Well, I don't really want to ask whether there's good cause for the IRS to be investigating you - but if there is, then I don't suppose it will help you to argue that they only developed suspicions as a result of an ex acting spitefully. I hope you get this sorted. I don't know if anybody here will be able to give you any advice on dealing with a tax audit.
Jessie1231 Posted June 15, 2015 Posted June 15, 2015 They are very fancy pieces. totaling over 20 cts. Some belonging to a famous deceased artist. I'd say 40-50k in value If I give that back, I lose that too and I don't know if he will stop there. He said he'd give me one chance to return the jewelry and no problems with happen. The next day, he said have it your way. You'll pay back 10x what you refuse to give me back. Then don't give it back and keep dealing with the audit. You're way over the amount of gifts as nonreportable income. It isn't necessarily nice of him but I don't think what he is causing is illegal and doubt it will stop until you pay taxes on your gifts. 2
Keenly Posted June 15, 2015 Posted June 15, 2015 Did you play both of these guys? asking for the jewelry back was one thing, but the threat... Do you even think the two are connected?
Author missymisda Posted June 15, 2015 Author Posted June 15, 2015 (edited) Did you play both of these guys? asking for the jewelry back was one thing, but the threat... Do you even think the two are connected? I was in a complicated situation. He was always the nicest and most patient person and this came out of nowhere. He has a lot of options when it comes to women too. I broke up with him 2 days after he gave me a diamond tennis bracelet but he didn't mention anything. He was very sweet about the breakup and this literally came out of nowhere. Almost everyone I spoke to said none of what he did constitutes any type of threat that is illegal. It seems like he is very very calculating and knows exactly what he is doing which is what is making this so difficult for me. He is the type that plans out every little last detail. He was always very thoughtful and super kind to me. I understand that he was hurt but I apologized for hurting him. He just seems hell bent on revenge but I have no evidence other than those texts which are very vague and everyone is telling me don't constitute a threat legally. Edited June 15, 2015 by missymisda
Keenly Posted June 15, 2015 Posted June 15, 2015 Be honest with yourself. You don't have to tell us, because its private information that will live here forever, but did you do anything financially shady that would flag an IRS Audit? Spend a lot of money lately? Perhaps more than would be alluded to by your recent tax filings? Do you have an undisclosed income? Because if you do, that would probably be the cause of this right there. I have a hard time imagining this one guy can pull some strings and get an IRS audit.
Taramere Posted June 15, 2015 Posted June 15, 2015 I was in a complicated situation. He was always the nicest and most patient person and this came out of nowhere. He has a lot of options when it comes to women too. I broke up with him 2 days after he gave me a diamond tennis bracelet but he didn't mention anything. He was very sweet about the breakup and this literally came out of nowhere. I struggle to understand why you would accept such an expensive gift from a man you were about to break up with - and since you broke up with him only two days later, you must have known by that point that you were going to do it. It's all very well to say that gifts are non returnable...but you don't have to accept a gift. Especially not from somebody you're about to break up with. I hope the IRS audit doesn't hit you too hard, but maybe there's a lesson or two to be learned from this unfortunate episode. 3
frankiesaysrelax Posted June 15, 2015 Posted June 15, 2015 maybe there's a lesson or two to be learned from this unfortunate episode. So, you tried to play two guys at once knowing one of them was well-off and well-connected and had close friends in state government. When you tried to dump him, after being deceitful, he was nice about it at first while sitting there thinking about how to exact revenge without risking getting into trouble. It doesn't sound like he is upset about the $$ more than he sounds upset that you lied to and cheated on him. You are so selfish you are refusing to give back his jewelry. Who can really blame the guy? You play with matches, you get burnt. It's that simple. 2
frankiesaysrelax Posted June 15, 2015 Posted June 15, 2015 I have a hard time imagining this one guy can pull some strings and get an IRS audit. Anyone can trigger an IRS audit. They'll go after anyone - all they need is someone to give them a reason to. 1
ravfour4 Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 (edited) And that's why you don't hoe it up, date two people at once, lie to them and send dirty pics lol Also you're acting like a lame empty apology on your end is supposed to remedy all of your bad actions - that's not how it works. Edited June 16, 2015 by ravfour4
O'Malley Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 Your ex is a nasty piece of work; I think you should have been honest that you were seeing other people but multi-dating isn't the crime of the century either. I've heard of exes, former employees and others with an ax to grind reporting someone to the IRS, certainly some are motivated by vindictiveness, others do it to get the reward. Either way, you placed yourself in a vulnerable position if you weren't declaring income. Since you've received the audit notice then prepare yourself as best you can. Retain a lawyer and accountant with experience with audits, get your accounts and records in order, do not omit information to your counsel and try to get this sorted out. If you're upfront, the IRS is likelier to work with you. Keep a record of all contacts John has sent you - especially his comment that you would be paying 10x the amount if you didn't return those gifts. Don't respond to him in any way from now on. My take is that what has been set in motion can't be undone, your focus should be on the audit and you are going to need whatever assets you currently have.
JewelD Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 What type of question is this? GIVE THE JEWELRY BACK. I'm not surprised you're being audited, what goes around comes around and this sounds like karma working its magic. If you want to make it somewhat right, just give the jewelry back.
O'Malley Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 Returning the gifts isn't going to magically make the IRS and the audit go away. OP understandably isn't mentioning specifics that could have triggered the audit. This site is fine for general relationship questions, but she needs to seek out professional advice. 1
NoLeafClover Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 HoW about ....stop making excuses and give the $40k+ jewelry back. I domt care what people here have to say about what I am about to say. You are no backbone gold digger. You have no dignity for yourself. You want the cake and eat it too. If you had a backbone and really were seeing two guys at one time(says a lot about you), then you would know the gifts you received were because he thought there was no other person in the picture. No man or woman gives a gift to someone knowing that person is screwing Johnny Boy on the side..let alone gifts that are worth thousand. Taking into the account your actions, it is safe to say you manipulated your ways into the gifts. Yes gifts are gifts but when the intentions are neutral. You didnt know and you chose another option therefore you should return them immediately on request no questions asked. My idea is you want to keep them not because of IRS but because they are worth a lot of coins. The whole thing about him blackmailing you still even after you return the gifts is the biggest bs ever. You are worried about him blackmailing you but you are the one that is holding $50k in posession and wont give it back to him...after you pretty much screwed him over. How about start with giving his stuff back. Then if he gets into your business after you send him the gifts you can then file a claim or.call the cops. 3
gnick Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 That guy was stupid to give you gifts worth that much money and you were even more stupid to accept them under the circumstances. Now you're taking the stupidity to a new level by not giving it back. Even a rich guy doesn't give out that much money without expecting something in return
frankiesaysrelax Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 What type of question is this? GIVE THE JEWELRY BACK. I say get back together. These two are meant for each other lol
Taramere Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 Returning the gifts isn't going to magically make the IRS and the audit go away. OP understandably isn't mentioning specifics that could have triggered the audit. This site is fine for general relationship questions' date=' but she needs to seek out professional advice.[/quote'] I agree with that. Now that she's in this mess, she might well need that jewellery to sell (though obviously the wisdom of selling it is something to be discussed with a tax expert). Definitely a cautionary tale for others, though, with regard to accepting expensive gifts from wealthy guys. There are often going to be strings, or expectations, attached to those gifts.
Clarence_Boddicker Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 IRS can't do anything to you if you are somewhat following the regs & are not dumb enough to admit to unreported income. Did you bomb your fb with pics of the rocks you got? If so, sell one to pay your taxes.
Author missymisda Posted June 16, 2015 Author Posted June 16, 2015 I agree with that. Now that she's in this mess, she might well need that jewellery to sell (though obviously the wisdom of selling it is something to be discussed with a tax expert). Definitely a cautionary tale for others, though, with regard to accepting expensive gifts from wealthy guys. There are often going to be strings, or expectations, attached to those gifts. I left all the Jewelry in a envelope and gave it to his sister. He got it this morning. I think it made him think about things. He texted me saying that "you are the righteous person and I am the wicked one and the Lord will judge each of us according to his actions." Should I take that as a good sign?
Chi townD Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 I left all the Jewelry in a envelope and gave it to his sister. He got it this morning. I think it made him think about things. He texted me saying that "you are the righteous person and I am the wicked one and the Lord will judge each of us according to his actions." Should I take that as a good sign? Hell, I took that as sarcasm. Hopefully, he'll call off the hounds now. If not, then get a lawyer and you can probably go after him for harassment. Only problem is, he's probably got deeper pockets than you and would have his lawyer drag I out until you couldn't afford to fight anymore.
Taramere Posted June 16, 2015 Posted June 16, 2015 I left all the Jewelry in a envelope and gave it to his sister. He got it this morning. I think it made him think about things. He texted me saying that "you are the righteous person and I am the wicked one and the Lord will judge each of us according to his actions." Should I take that as a good sign? Keep the text, in case he reported the gift to the IRS. You might need some sort of proof that you gave it back. Given the value, a more secure (and evidenced) method of return would have been wise - but at least he's acknowledged receipt. In a somewhat weird way, but probably good enough. I wouldn't get into any more discussion with him, in case that results in things just blowing up again. Hopefully this is an end to his troublemaking.
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