BluFish Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 So the guy I've been seeing for about 8 weeks left for his friend's bachelor party Wednesday to Vegas. He and a bunch of his friends drove there. He texted me during the trip. The "festivities" they'd planned began Thursday and run thru Sunday. I know they're doing a bunch of stuff aside from the "typical Vegas bar scene" like going to a concert, sightseeing, catching up with old friends. On Thursday I texted him, "have a great time. Looking forward to hearing about it" as we do have a date set for Tuesday when he comes back. He replied something along the lines of, "thanks. Monday is going to be rough haha." Since then, I haven't heard from him. I know he's with friends, but I can't help but feel my little insecurities take over. And that bothers me because at first, I had no problem not talking to him for a few days, but then my imagination took over. He hasn't given me a reason to doubt him, but we are not exclusive yet so he is entitled to do as he pleases. I feel like an update text isn't too hard to do. I'm keeping busy, but still. In the luls of the day, I feel uneasy about it. I'm refraining from texting him. I guess I'll just wait to see what happens... Thoughts? Am I being unreasonable for expecting a small message? Link to post Share on other sites
SunnySide0418 Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 I kind of think if you're not exclusive yes you are expecting too much. Sure it would be nice. I agree you should not text him. Wait for him to get in touch with you. When he's home hoe often do you guys communicate? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author BluFish Posted June 14, 2015 Author Share Posted June 14, 2015 Everyday. Sometimes spanning all day. Link to post Share on other sites
TheBathWater Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 So the guy I've been seeing for about 8 weeks left for his friend's bachelor party Wednesday to Vegas. He and a bunch of his friends drove there. He texted me during the trip. The "festivities" they'd planned began Thursday and run thru Sunday. I know they're doing a bunch of stuff aside from the "typical Vegas bar scene" like going to a concert, sightseeing, catching up with old friends. On Thursday I texted him, "have a great time. Looking forward to hearing about it" as we do have a date set for Tuesday when he comes back. He replied something along the lines of, "thanks. Monday is going to be rough haha." Since then, I haven't heard from him. I know he's with friends, but I can't help but feel my little insecurities take over. And that bothers me because at first, I had no problem not talking to him for a few days, but then my imagination took over. He hasn't given me a reason to doubt him, but we are not exclusive yet so he is entitled to do as he pleases. I feel like an update text isn't too hard to do. I'm keeping busy, but still. In the luls of the day, I feel uneasy about it. I'm refraining from texting him. I guess I'll just wait to see what happens... Thoughts? Am I being unreasonable for expecting a small message? Not unreasonable, no. But do your best to stifle any suspicions of your own mind's creation. Trust me from recent experience. You'll regret it. Link to post Share on other sites
mandymor Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 You haven't been dating that long and you guys aren't exclusive so I would let him enjoy his trip and wait for him to contact you. It's Vegas so I can understand your mind is thinking all kinds of things, but just relax and see what happens. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 14, 2015 Share Posted June 14, 2015 What you are experiencing is not uncommon. You miss him & he's off having fun. That's all. The cooler you are about this, the better off you will be. When he gets home if things are different, then you can worry. Since he's already said Monday will be rough, I might send him a picture of some aspirin & Gatorade with a note that says hope this virtually helps. Safe home. See you tomorrow. If you do message him do not say you miss him or anything like that. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author BluFish Posted June 15, 2015 Author Share Posted June 15, 2015 So this morning, he sent me a picture of our skyline with the caption, "good to be home." I was busy and couldn't reply for a while, but when I did, I said, "glad you made it back safe. How was it?" He replied, "me too. It was ok . :)". I haven't replied yet because I feel like I don't want to push him for details if he'd beig short. I know he must be tired since he caught the red-eye. Should I leave it be for now? Link to post Share on other sites
Gary S Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 Hmmm, a bachelor party in Vegas, huh? So what's the nature of this party, are their girls involved, and if so, how scantily clothed? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 Should I leave it be for now? Reach out & ask him on a date, your treat. Link to post Share on other sites
Author BluFish Posted June 15, 2015 Author Share Posted June 15, 2015 We have a date scheduled for tomorrow. No set time however. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 Should I leave it be for now? let him sleep off the trip and let him call you to confirm the date tomorrow. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 If you already have tomorrow's date set up, what's the problem? Link to post Share on other sites
Author BluFish Posted June 15, 2015 Author Share Posted June 15, 2015 I tend to make mountains out of molehills. Small things become HUGE deals. Which is what I'm dealing with now. My simple question has turned into a "did I look so needy for info he'll assume I'm desperate and stop seeing me." When it was only a question. So dumb right? Link to post Share on other sites
Lansing Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 Sure you guys will talk about the trip on your date. No problem in asking him more about what he did, the shows he saw, etc. Have a conversation and not an interrogation. You know better than anyone else if you have a reason to worry. If he hasn't given you any reason not to trust him before then why start worrying now. Link to post Share on other sites
minime13 Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 You're 8 weeks in, he was at a bachelor party in Vegas, and sent you a message on the way home. Take a few steps back and relax. Your message when he left was a "I'll catch up with you when you return" message. Which is what it should have been. He's with his buddies celebrating a life event, and his non-exclusive lady friend is not going to be his top priority (nor should it). A check in or quick talk would be appropriate for long-term committed partners, but not with where your relationship is. It is understandable to feel the way you are, since you normally communicate daily. However, trips will be different - especially when you're not exclusive and it's just a couple of months in. Just relax, let him confirm the time of the date, and then I'm sure you'll find that he's happy to see you again when you meet up. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 I tend to make mountains out of molehills. Small things become HUGE deals. Stop self-sabotaging. That is going to destroy your relationships faster than anything else. What's the worst than can happen? He decides to not pursue you? Ok..then you just move on--you don't have to forfeit your life because of it. There is nothing here to make mountains or molehills out of. He went to Vegas with his friends. He's back and you two have a date tomorrow. Best piece of advice to give you is to live in the now instead of in the future. Until he decides that it's good policy to throw in with you, enjoy what you do have and let things fall out in their own time. Link to post Share on other sites
SunnySide0418 Posted June 15, 2015 Share Posted June 15, 2015 I think you should be happy he texted you right when he got home. That's a good sign. Link to post Share on other sites
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