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Posted

I'm just wondering -- is there value in taking a break from a relationship? Or is it better to just break up. Also, has anyone been able to take a break from a relationship while living with someone? I'd love to hear various folks' perspective.

Posted

I think it depends on the circumstances and if both parties want the break. My ex used to talk about it a lot, but we never did it and ended up breaking up anyway.

 

Personally, I think a break is just what people say when they want to break up but they're not entirely sure and they want time to test the waters of being single. If I wanted a break or my partner did, I would just break up with them, because it's clear one person is not satisfying the other.

 

What could really be going on in someone's life that they need to cut out a huge chunk of their support system temporarily? But maybe that's just me, I don't like wishy washy people. We're either going to be together or we're not. It's not a basketball game, there's no timeouts when it comes to me.

 

I've never taken a break while living with someone, but I imagine it would be fairly difficult and uncomfortable as you're going to be in each other's faces everyday and not really getting much of a break from each other.

Posted

If one or the other suggests a break, that means someone is not feeling the relationship is going to work. It's often just a stepping stone to their main objective in ending the relationship.

 

 

If I was dating someone and they told me they needed a break, they'd get it and never hear from me again.

Posted

Personally will never ever see the point in taking a break from a relationship. If one or both of you feel a break is needed, it's not working. Just end it there and then.

 

My ex sprung that whole 'we should take a break' thing. I endured that for a day and gave her an ultimatum. She decided she wanted to be with me. But the next day it just kind of clicked, why would I want to be with someone that could happily leave me hanging whilst she decided whether or not she wants to be with me? So I called her and ended it. Would've done it face to face, but it was relatively long distance and I couldn't be bothered travelling all that way just to end a relatively unhealthy 5 month relationship. We were both unhappy in the relationship and it was definitely for the best :)

Posted

As Carrie Bradshaw would say: "A break is just a hop, skip and a week away from a breakup."

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Posted

Just a matter of semantics, unless something extraordinary is going on. By that I mean a tragedy like family members getting killed in a crash or a life threatening illness. For most, it's just a cowardly & selfish way to end things with someone. For some (usually sociopaths), it's a way to hurt or manipulate their victim.

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