What a mess

[k8266]

Hello, Looking for advice. Will try to condense as best that I can. I joined Face Book late April this year. I know what took so long. So within two days I had over 200 Friend requests. Mostly from HS friends I havent seen in over 30 years (class of 84).

 

So I get a friend request from a girl who grew up down the street where I lived back then. She (T) graduated a year before me same HS 1983. Her sister M, graduated with me in 1984. T sends me a message asking me if I remember a girl P who went to school with me. She also was a year older then me graduated with T in 83. I said yes. T informed me she would be sending me a friend request which I accepted.

 

P is 49 and me 48. She is recently divorced 2013 after 23 years of marriage and has two grown kids and a granddaughter. I've never been married, have no kids or any baggage of any sort. I have been out of the dating seen for some time and told this to P. She informs me that she was recently out of a 3 year relationship. And in her words the guy is a playboy who has about 5 women at any time including herself. She was tired of it. The guy wouldn't commit to her so it ended, or so I thought. We agreed to go out on a date. I am 60 miles away from P but willing to drive to meet with her.

 

Even though we agreed on a date here is what happened. The first weekend of May I was out of town so I couldn't plan anything. The second week of May after speaking with P we couldn't set anything up because of Mothers day weekend. So I planned on taking P to a ballgame the weekend of May 16. I called her and spoke to her briefly on the 14th of May and told her the plans etc.

 

The next day Friday the 15th. P sends me a text indicating that she heard that I was "wheeling and dealing" my photos around FB. And that she doesn't want to be part of a players life. She un-friended me on FB. To have a great life etc etc.. I looked at this message and was like WTH. None of that was true. I wasn't doing that and really was taking aback with astonishment by what I read.

 

The only thing I thought could have started this was I told M that I was getting a lot of messages from girls who graduated with us. And maybe she mentioned this to her sister T and she passed it on to P. I didn't return P's text and decided to flat out call her which I did.

 

She answered right away and I said listen what you are saying is wrong. I'm not a player never have been and wasn't playing her. (Heck I haven't been on a date since 07, hardly a player.) I told her this. Her response was it wasn't me but that she was still in love with her ex, bla bla bla. I was glad she told me this, told her as well and wished her well. I understood.

 

I went on with my life. I had no contact with P in any way. No text, PM's, phone calls nothing. Shortly after I received a text from her friend T telling me to move on, that P would never get over her ex. That she has been chasing him for 3 years, and she called him a tool. She apologized for setting us up and thought that P was ready to move on. I replied simply "I'm OK, I have moved on and have no plans to get in touch with P again".

 

Eight days pass. On the 9th Memorial day weekend P sends me a PM through Face Book. She wishes me a pleasant holiday weekend, and says "I believe that I'm ready to meet, talk soon". I reply simply. "Up North at cottage will call you when back home."

 

I call her Wednesday 27th of May. I ask her out that weekend. She can't has a weekend commitment at a city festival. But she says lets meet for lunch next Wednesday June 3rd. I say fine. We agreed to meet halfway and I told her I would be calling her the day before Tuesday night. Tuesday comes around I send her a brief text indicating I would call her at 8pm tonight. About an hour later she sends me this text "just got a call from a company, have meeting tomorrow so sorry".

 

I couldn't believe it. About this time her friend T is sending me a PM on FB asking me if I was excited to see P tomorrow. I respond by saying so disappointed, she just cancelled by text. And told her for over a month I tried numerous time to date P and all I got was nothing. Well T never responded.

 

As far as the text from P, I didn't respond to it. Now 11 days have passed and I have been radio silent. No texts, phone calls nothing to P just like prior. And nothing to T either.

 

I looked at it this way. That P wasn't serious and if she was she would have wanted to reschedule a date right away. I have no real way of knowing if her meeting was legit or a lie. She didn't cancel last second. And did give me 24 hours notice. But still I cant tell you how disappointed I was and am still.

 

Questions: WTH is going on here? Why did she come back the first time after calling me a player? Why if she was interested is she flaking? What do I do? The problem is I like her. We had constructed telephone calls and was looking forward to meeting her. Am I doing the right thing by not responding to her last text or not calling her? Do you think that she will again contact me in the future? It shouldn't take a month to see someone. I've walked away again.

 

This is making me think way to much here. Looking for any advice. Thank You for reading.

Edited June 12, 2015 by k8266

[Jessie1231]

She sounds a bit like a drama queen so I would say you dodged a bullet. Move on, there are plenty of others.

[Fleur de cactus]

The problem you are having is that you are not dealing with one woman, but all a bunch of them. They talk between them and each one comes back to talk to you, and then go back and report to each other about you. It is a drama like teen girls, with rumors and gossip. Detach yourself from that group of women, and move on to avoid more drama like " he said this" when you never intend to mean anything wrong. Date other women and Good luck with dating. Don't be discouraged.