Krieger Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 What does the big girl like about a skinny guy? Do we remind them of what they want to look like?Is it usually because really skinny guys and fat women feel ugly in there eyes. so they "settle" for each other, or look past the weight issue all together because they themselves don't feel like they deserve better. Most realize that better doesn't come with a scale, but some don't. I've heard men getting flack for caring too much about women's bodies, but I I don't think it's fair singling them out. Women can be the same way. I'll admit that I'm not physically attracted to overweight woman , but I don't look for an underweight woman and date them. Thick woman on the other hand a different ball game . I think woman to have shape and curves but not be overweight . One woman comes to mind Rachael Ray her body type is perfect for me . For me I will not date a girl bigger than me or a girl too skinny it is gross .
Gloria25 Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 When I see certain skinny guy/heavy woman couples - IMO, the guy is either scrawny skinny and/or has other issues going on (insecurities) and figures that a heavier woman is going to be grateful that he gave her the time of day...so, he develops a "preference" for heavier women... Similar thing happens with women too....they'll seek out a drunk and/or heavier guy (and/or feed him a lot of food and/or booze) to make him "theirs" and less desirable to other females. I don't wanna be in a RL where someone is with me cuz they think they can't do better and/or I'm gonna get on my knees and be like "Halelujah" dude settled for me. I also don't believe in manipulations/controlling actions just to attract/keep someone. 3
toscaroscura Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 I think you're overthinking it. Just because a fat woman or a skinny guy might be ugly to some people or "society", doesn't mean they are ugly to each other! My ex husband was skinny as a rail. I'm a size 10-16 (fluctuated over the years, now a 12), so I was always "bigger" than him. Physical attraction was never our problem. To him, I was gorgeous and to me he was sexy. 10
Gloria25 Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 When I see certain skinny guy/heavy woman couples - IMO, the guy is either scrawny skinny and/or has other issues going on (insecurities) and figures that a heavier woman is going to be grateful that he gave her the time of day...so, he develops a "preference" for heavier women... Similar thing happens with women too....they'll seek out a drunk and/or heavier guy (and/or feed him a lot of food and/or booze) to make him "theirs" and less desirable to other females. I don't wanna be in a RL where someone is with me cuz they think they can't do better and/or I'm gonna get on my knees and be like "Halelujah" dude settled for me. I also don't believe in manipulations/controlling actions just to attract/keep someone. So, IMO, certain heavier woman prefer certain skinner guys cuz they figure he's desperate and will settle for them (relationship security blanket).
40 Fonzarelli Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 I'm skinny but most of my ex's have been "thicker". It's just what I am attracted to. 1
fitnessfan365 Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 I think you're overthinking it. Just because a fat woman or a skinny guy might be ugly to some people or "society", doesn't mean they are ugly to each other! My ex husband was skinny as a rail. I'm a size 10-16 (fluctuated over the years, now a 12), so I was always "bigger" than him. Physical attraction was never our problem. To him, I was gorgeous and to me he was sexy. I've always been really attracted to women that are size 10-12. They're not big enough to be obese, but are carrying just a bit of extra weight in the right places and look healthy. I've never been attracted to women that had asses and hips meeting in a straight line or that were so skinny you could see their ribs protruding. 2
Author Krieger Posted June 12, 2015 Author Posted June 12, 2015 I've always been really attracted to women that are size 10-12. They're not big enough to be obese, but are carrying just a bit of extra weight in the right places and look healthy. I've never been attracted to women that had asses and hips meeting in a straight line or that were so skinny you could see their ribs protruding. The only draw back to dating Asian woman is some of them are too skinny . Than Mexican woman are some times too fat . However I am a sucker for thick Mexican chick with a cute face. I do not date too many white woman and will never date a black woman unless she from East Africa . I've always been really attracted to women that are size 2 to 10.
losangelena Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 LOL, I am even wondering why this thread was even created! To push buttons? I am a larger girl - size 10/14, depending - and I am a good 40 lbs heavier than my BF (who, believe it or not, has gained about 25 lbs of muscle this past year through lifting). I do not see dating him as "settling," and in fact find that assertion to be quite insulting. Before I met him, I went out with men with a variety of body sizes, and felt quite insecure about dating someone smaller than me, but so many of his other qualities were so attractive to me that I overlooked the physical side at first. Bottom line, people are attracted to whom they are attracted. Who cares if they're 90 lbs or 300? What difference does it make? 2
toscaroscura Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 I've always been really attracted to women that are size 10-12. They're not big enough to be obese, but are carrying just a bit of extra weight in the right places and look healthy. I've never been attracted to women that had asses and hips meeting in a straight line or that were so skinny you could see their ribs protruding. It's pretty amusing/insulting when slender or fit people assume a man is only settling for me because I got a little junk in my trunk, or that I didnt really love my ex's skinny frame and i would dump him for a meathead. :laugh: I *tend* to be attracted to thinner guys (think typical nerdy/gawky), (although I've really been attracted to a wide variety in practice). I don't really know why those types catch my eye, but I love their lithe, sinewy frames, knuckl-y hands and often prominent noses! 1
fitnessfan365 Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 It's pretty amusing/insulting when slender or fit people assume a man is only settling for me because I got a little junk in my trunk, or that I didnt really love my ex's skinny frame and i would dump him for a meathead. :laugh: I *tend* to be attracted to thinner guys (think typical nerdy/gawky), (although I've really been attracted to a wide variety in practice). I don't really know why those types catch my eye, but I love their lithe, sinewy frames, knuckl-y hands and often prominent noses! Yeah but wouldn't it be nice if you could had a guy that could lift you off the ground against a wall without throwing his back out? I remember a great line from Saved by the Bell - The College Years awhile back. The Dorm supervisor Mike Rogers offers to help Screech bulk up. Screech says "I just want to be able to lift up the toilet seat without getting a hernia" Hahahaha
cessna Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 I genuinely don't think fat women are happy with how they look. Very few men are attracted to fat women because being fat is a choice. Being fat shows that you don't care about your health or appearance. I often think fat girls with skinny guys are with them because either that is what they aspire to be deep down or they want to feel some sort of dominance. 1
Gloria25 Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 AI think this thread has a valid point...and asks the question as to what motivates certain people to date certain people... And yes, like it or not, weight does drive certain "preferences" I mean, I see lots of black men prefer "thicker" (not necessarily obese) caucasian women... I see Mexican guys usually date Mexican or fat/obese caucasian women...I maybe "once" seen a Mexican guy with a black woman (thin or not) I prefer thin or "fit" men...because I am fit. I also am not into gym rats. Why? Because of the "visual"...I mean, sorry, but me - especially during sex - am watching that body. Gosh, if he has ink/tattoos, even better. I also am a "physical" person. In the bedroom, we are gonna work it out. That requires strength and stamina. A great sex session leaves me hungry for a big breakfast or a bit of snackin' after/in between the sex - as if I had a workout. Lastly, I need someone who won't be insecure about me. I had one guy squeeze my bicep and ask "is that a muscle?". I need a guy comfortable with me being a strong woman with some tone on her body... So yes, weight is a factor in some coupling trends - stereotypes even.
Author Krieger Posted June 12, 2015 Author Posted June 12, 2015 LOL, I am even wondering why this thread was even created! To push buttons? I am a larger girl - size 10/14, depending - and I am a good 40 lbs heavier than my BF (who, believe it or not, has gained about 25 lbs of muscle this past year through lifting). I do not see dating him as "settling," and in fact find that assertion to be quite insulting. Before I met him, I went out with men with a variety of body sizes, and felt quite insecure about dating someone smaller than me, but so many of his other qualities were so attractive to me that I overlooked the physical side at first. Bottom line, people are attracted to whom they are attracted. Who cares if they're 90 lbs or 300? What difference does it make? I do not play games like that . I also noticed that fat guys or thick built guys date skinny woman. Like I said I will not date a female bigger than me it looks to funny to me.
toscaroscura Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 Yeah but wouldn't it be nice if you could had a guy that could lift you off the ground against a wall without throwing his back out? I remember a great line from Saved by the Bell - The College Years awhile back. The Dorm supervisor Mike Rogers offers to help Screech bulk up. Screech says "I just want to be able to lift up the toilet seat without getting a hernia" Hahahaha Oh sure! I have dated a couple muscular guys. Perhaps it was a hold-over from my awkward nerdy days but in the past I usually didn't go after/flirt with muscly guys. I thought they'd probably prefer a fit woman with muscle tone. I viewed them like nice art, lovely to look at! Over the past year or so I have broadened my horizons and found that lots of types of men like me. Also I am tall (5'7"), not extraordinarily so but being dainty enough to be thrown around just wasn't a thought I ever had!
Gloria25 Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 My fav podcaster had a call like a day or so ago where a 5'5", 180lbs woman called who had been with her husband for 10 years (dated 6 years, married 4). She was frustrated cuz the sex stopped cuz hubby says she's too overweight After my fav podcaster did some prodding, come to find out her husband was addicted to porn and married her overweight....in other words, he had intimacy issues, used porn to have sex and wants to blame the wife when he married her at that weight. My point is, no one is shaming fat or skinny - but to deny that the weight is a factor that makes you look at certain couples and ask "why?"...will show that there's other factors beneath the surface (no pun intended) to drive a certain person to choose a certain body type to date/sex/marry/etc. 1
xxoo Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 Maybe people are focusing on dating people, and not on body types. People have bodies--fat, thin, and in between. People--fat, thin, and in between-- are driven to mate and date. A sorts of pairings happen. Love is a beautiful thing. 7
ColdandLonelyinAK Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 There should be a new sub section just with threads about overweight people. That seems to be the trend lately on the forum. My ex wasn't rail skinny. Average to slightly muscular and military so he got one or two workouts in everyday. He never had an issue with my weight. He was a "10" to many people, and always told me I'm beautiful. Some men just don't care and appreciate other forms of beautiful. We were always told we were a beautiful-looking couple even though I was the bigger one in the relationship, and I worried we were in different "leagues". At first, I was self conscious about it, but he didn't care. Our problems never had to do with weight. In fact, he told me he felt lucky to be with me a lot. I don't know why it's so hard for people to believe that a skinny man or woman can be with a "fat" person and love them and not be settling. It's like saying overweight people are unworthy of love and should be alone. 2
alphamale Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 i saw a 200lb physician on TV a while ago. she probably likes skinny guys. some skinny guys dig heavier chicks. i don't know what the appeal is.
SleeplessIn Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 There can also be other things "going on" that an observer doesn't know about. To see me and my husband together, some could wonder why he "chose" a heavy woman when he is a skinny guy. But the facts in play are these: I was at a very good weight (about 125) when we met and married, and in fact he was overweight by a bit which didn't matter at all to me because I really loved him as a person. Move ahead 4 years and I was diagnosed with a thyroid disease, put on intensive medication and gained about 40 lbs in 5 months, another 20 over the next year. Move ahead yet another 4 years, and he was diagnosed with cancer, underwent successful surgery, but lost 150 lbs in 6 months and has never gained back much (they had to take part of his stomach). You can choose a person with the body type you really are drawn to, but if you last as a couple, the circumstances of life can change that body type in any one of a number of drastic ways. 2
Author Krieger Posted June 12, 2015 Author Posted June 12, 2015 There can also be other things "going on" that an observer doesn't know about. To see me and my husband together, some could wonder why he "chose" a heavy woman when he is a skinny guy. But the facts in play are these: I was at a very good weight (about 125) when we met and married, and in fact he was overweight by a bit which didn't matter at all to me because I really loved him as a person. Move ahead 4 years and I was diagnosed with a thyroid disease, put on intensive medication and gained about 40 lbs in 5 months, another 20 over the next year. Move ahead yet another 4 years, and he was diagnosed with cancer, underwent successful surgery, but lost 150 lbs in 6 months and has never gained back much (they had to take part of his stomach). You can choose a person with the body type you really are drawn to, but if you last as a couple, the circumstances of life can change that body type in any one of a number of drastic ways. Well I have no issue if I dated a skinny girl and we get married and have a few kids and she fills out some. I am not a jerk and break up with her. However if a girl goes from 140 pounds and we have two kids and she get to 300 pounds and will not lose weight I might divorce her. A few pounds is OK even if she goes from size 6 to 8 it is all good. I am sure if woman will feel the same way if a guy gained weight and now the twice the size. 1
ColdandLonelyinAK Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 i saw a 200lb physician on TV a while ago. she probably likes skinny guys. some skinny guys dig heavier chicks. i don't know what the appeal is. I think a lot of it has to do with self confidence. My ex told me it took him a couple of weeks to work up the courage to talk to me (he had seen me at our favorite bar a few times). He told me he loved my charisma, and that I always seemed really happy and outgoing, and that there was "something about" me. Attitude will get you farther in life, a good one that is. Defeated women (and men) show it all over their face and body. Being happy in your own skin is a huge turn on for a lot of people. Also, something I've noticed with plus sized women, is that a lot of them tend to "give up" because they assume no man will want them. I used to be one of these women. I wore jeans and oversized sweatshirts with my hair up and no make up on. I figured "What's the point?" Then a friend and I started going out more, and I changed my wardrobe and put more time and effort into looking nice and presentable. I did it mostly for myself, to feel better. It made all the difference in the world. I started getting dates and phone numbers left and right, and these were some VERY attractive men, too. I know it's hard to believe, but confidence and having a happy demeanor that says "I'm still proud of who I am" can make a woman beautiful. It's not just about size for a lot of people. 1
lino Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 Where I live I haven't seen the really skinny man/very fat woman couple you're speaking of OP. I more commonly see a fit, average or a little overweight man with a very fat woman here. 99% of the time it's because the guy in question simply isn't desired by women who aren't very fat, for whatever superficial reason. However I have met guys in the past who do GENUINELY go after fat girls. More commonly I see overweight men with in shape and often quite attractive women but usually that's overweight guys with money.
SammySammy Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 Could sex be part of the reason? I always wondered how two 300+ pound people have sex. All of that huffing, puffing and sweating. Is anybody really being satisfied? I imagine if you had one big person and one skinny person, the chances of both being satisfied are enhanced tremendously. Just a thought. I don't know .... 2
carhill Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 Why do bigger chicks like skinny guys so much? Interesting question. If I had to posit a theory from my own M, given that exW's two past husbands and her current boyfriend are all 'skinny' (her BF probably weighs about 40 lbs less than she did while we were married), it would be 'challenge', not the challenge to get a skinny guy romantically interested but rather to challenge herself because of the weight difference. I was a bigger guy and comfortable with myself and her so didn't provide enough challenge and friction. Attraction killer. Again, a theory but one your question impelled. I hadn't given it much thought before. I've seen this (bigger attracted to skinny) with other women as well since I dated all sizes and shapes over the 20 years or so I was single.
loverboy69 Posted June 12, 2015 Posted June 12, 2015 My brother is a twig. He wound up marrying an obese woman. She's not just heavy she is obese (the kind of woman who needs help getting off the floor). In high school he'd make fun of women like that then he went and married one. It's one of those things we don't talk about to him but often left us scratching our heads. 1
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