Jimmyjackson Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 What are people's opinions on it? Do you think it says anything about the person? Does it make the person(s) involved easy? There seems to be this notion that it's okay for Boys but not girls. Having had a couple of one night stands myself although I don't regret them, I did feel empty after and I'm a guy. Guys, would a girls history of casual sex be a turn off? Girls, would you also feel the same about a man? Random question I know but seems to be a topic of conversation among my friends recently so wanted some outside opinions. A girl we know had a casual thing with a guy we know and we were a little surprised as it's not like her, so these kind of conversations started coming up and we tend to argue over our opinions on it.
smackie9 Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 You're single, it's your life to do whatever you want.
Keenly Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 Guys, would a girls history of casual sex be a turn off? A turnoff, yes. A deal breaker, no.
jen1447 Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 There'd be a lot more things to consider before making a judgment about somebody. 2
Clarence_Boddicker Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 It's not for me. Depends on her age & circumstances at the time. No, unless she's never had a LTR.
Hopeful30 Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 I think casual sex is just one form of sex, and it falls within the same category as exclusive sex, promiscuity, same sex, night sex, day sex, all sex or no sex. Its all valid and im still confused why this one gets so much attention. If youre asking personally, no, I dont like casual sex. Doesnt do much for me. Its when you know a person (to a degree at least) that you can really enjoy them and touch them right. At least thats how it is for me. 1
Gary S Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 It increases risk of disease, unplanned pregnancy and broken hearts. I'm all for monogamy and have no problem saying it. Women in love do it better. 3
blackcat777 Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 In my mind (ahh... the imagination!), one night stands were great. I finally had one with this one guy I was so crazy about for the longest time, and... It was awful. We didn't know each other at all. I came to realize I much preferred the intimacy of knowing someone's buttons--physical and psychological--far more deeply. I love that I can explore my boyfriend forever. I am having, by far, THE best sex of my life, and it's a great combination of lust, trust, and practice. It was great in the beginning when it was mostly lust, but now it's sooo much deeper than that. So much more fulfilling. 3
smackie9 Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 I had great sex LTR and casual/ ONS.....I don't need an emotional connection to enjoy it.....fireworks can still happen.
PogoStick Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 Casual sex, I LOVE it! If I really like a girl and we have a great time together then I could care less about her past.
joseb Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 I do need some kind of an emotional connection to have good sex, but it doesn't have to be from months of years - my best sex ever was with a girl I had only know for a few days. 1
Arieswoman Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 If a guy had a history of this it would put me off. I would also worry about STD's. However, most people keep their sexual history private, so you may not know all the facts. Personally, I couldn't have sex without an emotional connection.
Author Jimmyjackson Posted June 11, 2015 Author Posted June 11, 2015 In my mind (ahh... the imagination!), one night stands were great. I finally had one with this one guy I was so crazy about for the longest time, and... It was awful. We didn't know each other at all. I came to realize I much preferred the intimacy of knowing someone's buttons--physical and psychological--far more deeply. I love that I can explore my boyfriend forever. I am having, by far, THE best sex of my life, and it's a great combination of lust, trust, and practice. It was great in the beginning when it was mostly lust, but now it's sooo much deeper than that. So much more fulfilling. So you only had one and realised it wasn't for you? I've only had sex with one girl while being in a relationship and it is much better I agree.
d0nnivain Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 There are people for whom this behavior will be a deal breaker. There are people who won't care. There are people who prefer casual sex to a committed relationship. Opinions vary. The trick is to find somebody who shares your beliefs whatever they may be.
Gaeta Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 I think it has a lot to do with the age and where you're at in your life. When I was in my 20s it was something I was very judgmental about. In my 30s I started to be a little more open minded about it. Past 45 sex became something free and fun I should enjoy as much as possible while I am still cute and capable of enjoying it. 1
Mrin Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 Casual sex is like eating bacon dipped in mayo and sprinkled with honey. Sometimes it is fan-fking-tastic and sometimes it isn't. But in both regards, it is best not to tell many people that you did it.
Redhead14 Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 There is a difference between casual sex and promiscuity. Casual sex should be about some kind of selectivity. In other words, a man or a woman can and is entitled to becoming sexual with someone if they are really attracted to the person on some level even if it's say on a first date and/or becomes an ONS. If the date was good and you at least enjoyed it, fine. But, if you didn't enjoy the date or didn't really like the person, but you decide to have sex, that takes it out of the casual sex category and makes it more about promiscuity. If you've having "casual sex" with every single person you date, it's indiscriminate and promiscuous. 3
No Limit Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 Wouldn't be a turnoff, wouldn't be a dealbreaker. Single people having sex with other single people (or people in open relationships) is fine with me. Not everyone wants a serious relationship from the get-go, it needn't mean someone is cheap. If someguy can't handle a girls' number, that's his problem. The times when girls were thrown at a marriage prospect as virgins are history.
Author Jimmyjackson Posted June 11, 2015 Author Posted June 11, 2015 There is a difference between casual sex and promiscuity. Casual sex should be about some kind of selectivity. In other words, a man or a woman can and is entitled to becoming sexual with someone if they are really attracted to the person on some level even if it's say on a first date and/or becomes an ONS. If the date was good and you at least enjoyed it, fine. But, if you didn't enjoy the date or didn't really like the person, but you decide to have sex, that takes it out of the casual sex category and makes it more about promiscuity. If you've having "casual sex" with every single person you date, it's indiscriminate and promiscuous. I mean casual sex in the sense that a girl might come to your house who you already know, but you end up sleeping together as a one off thing. if it's a friend or someone you know, is it even casual still? even if it is a one time thing. Hardly a one night stand is it?
Author Jimmyjackson Posted June 11, 2015 Author Posted June 11, 2015 There are people for whom this behavior will be a deal breaker. There are people who won't care. There are people who prefer casual sex to a committed relationship. Opinions vary. The trick is to find somebody who shares your beliefs whatever they may be. Sometimes I kinda worry that a future girl might judge me for my ONS, I feel bad for doing them in a lot of ways, it just wasn't for me. I'm a guy and it might sound strange coming from one but I feel like a bad person for engaging in casual sex. But surely, most people have it in some form or another at one point in their lives?
Gloria25 Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 There is a difference between casual sex and promiscuity. Casual sex should be about some kind of selectivity. In other words, a man or a woman can and is entitled to becoming sexual with someone if they are really attracted to the person on some level even if it's say on a first date and/or becomes an ONS. If the date was good and you at least enjoyed it, fine. But, if you didn't enjoy the date or didn't really like the person, but you decide to have sex, that takes it out of the casual sex category and makes it more about promiscuity. If you've having "casual sex" with every single person you date, it's indiscriminate and promiscuous. THANK YOU!!! If I was "promiscuous" I wouldn't be going on 3 years w/o getting any...I've also had many of droughts over the years...but quite frankly, this 3 year one worries me cuz it "is" the longest I've ever had. Some of us prefer casual dating due to our "issues", situation, etc. I wish people would freakin' take the time to get to know you w/o thinking you're some witch that must be burnt at the stake at midnight in town square. I just find it funny how people wanna diss your preference in dating casually and somehow overlook all the people shacking up, rushing into marriage/kids, and/or having kids out of wedlock, walking down the altar with a bun in the oven - as if just cuz it's not a "casual" thing, it's somehow "dignified" when it's as irresponsible and senseless...worst, they drag kids in/out their chaos.
losangelena Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 Sometimes I kinda worry that a future girl might judge me for my ONS, I feel bad for doing them in a lot of ways, it just wasn't for me. I'm a guy and it might sound strange coming from one but I feel like a bad person for engaging in casual sex. But surely, most people have it in some form or another at one point in their lives? Why do you feel like a bad person for engaging in casual sex? Guess what? Whether you regret it or not, it's part of your history. A future GF can only accept it or not. If she won't accept it, then she's not the right one for you. Try not to fret over it too much. Most people are not overly judgmental about it.
alphamale Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 What are people's opinions on it? there is nothing wrong with casual sex as long as all parties realize thats what it is. 2
preraph Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 As long as the person is doing everything responsibly, I see nothing wrong with it. This would include: -Being single and not committed to anyone. -Providing their own birth control protection without fail, taking no chances, not leaving it up to a stranger to say "Trust me, I won't get pregnant." -Letting those you date know you are dating around and not looking for commitment at this time right up front. -Not lead someone on just to get laid. If you suspect they want more even though they aren't saying it, move on so they don't get too attached. -Never sleep with anyone who is married or committed or who has dated your good friends. 1
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