Penguin_hugs Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 Hi there I've been with my BF about 20 months now, and we are very happy- despite being LDR for nearly a year now. He lives around 2hrs away on the train- but soon that will only be an hour away and we can see each other a bit more. We've never really mentioned past relationships at all. When he asked me to be his GF, he said that he'd had 3 relationships in the past, 2 when he was 18 and then one that had lasted longer (around 3 years) but had ended 18 months before we met. That's pretty much been all he has ever said about his past which is fine by me- I think I would get jealous if I knew too much. He said that once he mentioned that he'd been on a date with someone and she'd messaged him constantly for a month after that, apparently my face changed and I seemed uncomfortable- so he never mentions the past. My dating history is minimal- a few lousy OLD, one guy I dated a few times and he messed me around (my BF is aware of that), one guy I fooled around with once (my BF is not aware) and then my Friend A. I started messaging Friend A a few years ago- we met on a dating site- but he lived 400 miles away. We just used to chat a lot as we had a lot in common. I tend to get on better with guys than girls anyway. We met half way once- had a nice day and kissed at the end. The 2nd time we met half way and nothing happened- not even a hug- and we realised we were better off just being friends- so we kept in touch chatting online as we still got on like good friends. I then met my BF around 2/3 months after the 2nd meeting and we have been together ever since. I told my BF that I had a friend in Location A who was in a similar profession to him. Around a year ago, I went on a trip to see family and was near to Friend A, so I visited him for the day as friends. I told my BF about it before, that it was a weird situation in that we met on a dating website- but that we were just friends- and he was fine with it- he said he isn't the jealous type. I never mentioned that we had kissed once- it was nearly 6 months before I met my BF. Now I have found out that Friend A has a new job- in the same area as my BF and will be relocating. Obviously I'd like to see Friend A when he moves, particularly as he won't know anyone in the area. I'm also planning on relocating to live with my BF next year- so it would be nice to know someone else in the same area other than my BF. I told my BF that Friend A has a new job, nearly working with him and he seemed fine with it. But I am wondering- should I tell him about the kiss all that time ago? I have zero feelings for Friend A- it's purely platonic. We just chat every now and then. I don't want to hurt my BF's feelings by omitting things- but I just didn't consider the kiss that relevant. Thanks for reading my marathon post! Any thoughts?
Gary S Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 It could make him jealous. Why do people feel the need to tell their partner every little thing, including negative, relationship damaging stuff? Your boyfriend is not your counselor. If you have something to get off your chest, tell it to a friend or counselor. Relationships take work. Sometimes, that means keeping your mouth shut. 4
jen1447 Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 I'd leave well enough alone. It wasn't anything anyway. 2
losangelena Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 Nope, don't tell him. It's not worth the potential hassle. 2
Satu Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 Your past belongs to you. Share what you want to share. Keep private what you want to keep private. 2
smackie9 Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 It was just a kiss....hardly worth mentioning it. 2
smackie9 Posted June 11, 2015 Posted June 11, 2015 Your past belongs to you. Share what you want to share. Keep private what you want to keep private. ^^^^^^this100% You never have to tell a BF EVERY damn detail of your sex life. 3
Author Penguin_hugs Posted June 11, 2015 Author Posted June 11, 2015 Thankyou for all your responses. I'll keep it to myself. It was a long time ago- and obviously I don't have feelings for the guy now!
Recommended Posts