lukastyler Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 I;m just frustrated with dating For example going out to eat, I always would say "Where do you want to eat" then it would turn into 30 minutes of back and forth. Then I realized women like men who take charge so I decided to just say "Applebees at 7" and the girls would agree but then it came off that i was being to controlling and bossy and now i'm just lost on what and how i do this I almost wanna ask the girl what she likes but that doesnt go well
jen1447 Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 You have to learn the fine art of kissing ass while hanging onto your balls. Men who can master that will have the world at their feet. 1
Redhead14 Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 I;m just frustrated with dating For example going out to eat, I always would say "Where do you want to eat" then it would turn into 30 minutes of back and forth. Then I realized women like men who take charge so I decided to just say "Applebees at 7" and the girls would agree but then it came off that i was being to controlling and bossy and now i'm just lost on what and how i do this I almost wanna ask the girl what she likes but that doesnt go well When a man asks for a date, he should offer all the specifics -- day, time and place. Stick with that. If she's mature, she can say, I'd like it if we went to X instead, if you don't mind. and the girls would agree but then it came off that i was being to controlling and bossy and now i'm just lost on what and how i do this -- And, how do you know that's what they thought? Did they tell you that? If so, they have the problem, not you. You're doing the asking and the paying, you pick the place.
Author lukastyler Posted June 9, 2015 Author Posted June 9, 2015 When a man asks for a date, he should offer all the specifics -- day, time and place. Stick with that. If she's mature, she can say, I'd like it if we went to X instead, if you don't mind. and the girls would agree but then it came off that i was being to controlling and bossy and now i'm just lost on what and how i do this -- And, how do you know that's what they thought? Did they tell you that? If so, they have the problem, not you. You're doing the asking and the paying, you pick the place. ive been told i like to do things my way but i dontbelieve that
Redhead14 Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 ive been told i like to do things my way but i dontbelieve that How many people are telling you that? If a number of people are telling you that, it may be time to do some introspective analysis. Denial is not just a river in Egypt
d0nnivain Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Women are not that passive. If a man says to me let's have dinner at Applebees Friday at 7 I'm either going to say OK or I'd rather go to XYZ Restaurant, if that was my preference. When changing the restaurant I usually tried to pick another place in the same price point or lower because it would be pretty rude & presumptuous to demand to be taken to a more expensive place. On occasion I would pick a nicer place but offer to pay. You aren't being bossy & controlling by doing that. You are simply being confident and clear. If in response to her counter proposal you said something snippy like No, I said Applebees & it's my way or the highway that would be bossy & controlling. Most people would a lot to the 30 minute debate on where to eat.
Erised Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 I prefer a person ask, and if I say I don't care (I almost never do - and if I did, I would have expressed that already), they just pick a place and that be the end of it. I'm not sure why that's a 30 minute conversation. I'm okay with a guy just saying xxx place. I'll say if that won't work for some reason. Applebees is not a usual pick if you aren't taking kids out to eat, though.
minime13 Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 If you are making the date, then have a place in mind. Suggest it, then ask for feedback. If the girl doesn't want to go there, then she needs to have her own suggestion in mind. If she doesn't, then ask for input on her interests, and make a choice there. It's not really that difficult. Communicate what you'd like, and give the option for other suggestions or compromise.
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