Otter2569 Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Have you ever thought deep inside that you would never find someone that would ever truly love you for who you are?
toscaroscura Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Have you ever thought deep inside that you would never find someone that would ever truly love you for who you are? Every day. I try not to dwell on it.
Phoe Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Have you ever thought deep inside that you would never find someone that would ever truly love you for who you are? Yup. Always been a MASSIVE fear. My ex played upon that fear when I broke up with him, told me "No one else will ever love you". I still remember the awful knot I got in my stomach as I felt anxiety wash over me. I responded so calmly, I don't even remember what I said, but I somehow was so calm... Even as I drove home, I stayed calm, the anxiety in me almost making me numb. Once I got in bed I broke down and the horrible fear that I felt, that was made real by his words, took over. I still remember those words sometimes and feel that awful fear, and feel so much resentment in me towards him for having said it. And especially get so angry at myself for letting the words that only existed to do me harm, harm me. 2
blackcat777 Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 AWW GUYS!!!!!!!! This makes me want to give everyone a hug. <3 <3 <3 You have to love yourself first. <3 <3 <3 It is kind of shocking and overpowering in those moments, though, when it is evident someone loves you unconditionally. It might be scary, but go ahead, challenge yourself to grow, take the plunge, and accept it. It makes me shake my head when I hear about all the relationships that people self-sabotage because they can't believe they're worthy. This is one of those cheesy yoga new age moments where self-love is the answer and the exit to this problem. Phoe, I'm sorry you had an ex like that. That's a horrendously manipulative thing to say.
Gloria25 Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Oh f- that "looooove" thing... Actually, I was thinking of that this weekend...and I have thought about this topic every now and then... And yes, sadly, I believe I will never find someone who will accept me for who I am...I'm a very complex creature. And sad thing is, I don't see how "me" being "me" has anything to do with them just spending time with me. That's one reason I seek out the types of RLs I do...less time you spend with me, less time you have to peel my layers and know "me". Well, that's their f'ng loss I say...idiots 1
Gloria25 Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Now that I remember.... Years ago I did the eHarmony thingy and was rejected!!!! Not even eHarmony could pair me up!!! :lmao: 1
Phoe Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Now that I remember.... Years ago I did the eHarmony thingy and was rejected!!!! Not even eHarmony could pair me up!!! :lmao: It did that to me too. Something like "sorry, you're one of those rare % of people that we can't properly match with others"... I had NO idea it could do that.
jen1447 Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Have you ever thought deep inside that you would never find someone that would ever truly love you for who you are? I was convinced of it when I lost my 'one true love' at an early age. Never since.
toscaroscura Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 It did that to me too. Something like "sorry, you're one of those rare % of people that we can't properly match with others"... I had NO idea it could do that. What in the heck! I hope you got a refund.
SammySammy Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Not really. I have found someone who loved me for who I am. The feeling wasn't mutual and the relationship ended. I'm a complicated person. Difficult to be with. However, I have found what I believe to be a real love and - if I wanted - believe I could find it again. I'm just comfortable being single right now.
Phoe Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 What in the heck! I hope you got a refund. Haha, luckily it didn't even let me sign up. It was the questionnaire at the beginning, and at the end of the questionnaire was the hilarious rejection. https://kellysbellydotcom.files.wordpress.com/2011/06/eharmony-rejection.png -____- 1
Clarence_Boddicker Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Sometimes, but not that much. Unlike the song, we have to find love ourselves. I do miss Freddie. 1
PrettyEmily77 Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 I've had 4 RLs, I went into all of them thinking it was true love, and I like to think it's the case with my current BF too but no, I've never had that concern: I have two very loving parents and I am very close to my brother so I tend to consider anything else as a really nice bonus.
Author Otter2569 Posted June 9, 2015 Author Posted June 9, 2015 From a very early age I remember thinking that I would always be alone. I have never had a problem meeting anyone and am rarely alone for very long but something always happens and I know they are not for me. I am pretty good at short term relationships though
Author Otter2569 Posted June 9, 2015 Author Posted June 9, 2015 Phoe, that is a terrible thing to say to someone. In a fit of anger I have thought of saying that but I never have and never will. Its almost like a desperation move and I wont go there. I figure watching me walk out the door is painful enough 1
PaperCrane Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 Honestly, I'll never know if they do or don't. I just wish I could find someone I can love who isn't so afraid of accepting it.
Robert Z Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 Have you ever thought deep inside that you would never find someone that would ever truly love you for who you are? No, and I wonder why you would say this. Haven't women loved you before? I thought you used to be married. I don't worry about being loved. I worry about what many women mean when they use the word.
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 I used to but not anymore. I have people in my life that love me unconditionally. It's not romantic type of love but it's just as valuable. 2
Torii Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 Love starts with you. If you don't take the time you need to really get to know yourself ; what type of person you are, what values you hold truth, you'll never really find somebody to love you because you, yourself won't even know who you are. Self-love, Self-worth goes a long way and can be noticed very quickly. Sometimes makes or breaks relationships because a partner can (and does!) notice if you have image issues with yourself. There's different types of love, and they all balance each other. 2
thefooloftheyear Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 My mother(and to a lesser degree other members of my family) truly loves me for all I am ....No question..As I do her... I realize its not the same as so called "romantic" love, but that's why, IMO, its very important for people to maintain these other close familial based relationships, because when you put all your eggs in the basket of relative strangers.....well...its always gonna be a crap shoot...and subject to a lifetime of potential let downs...Most people cant differentiate love from horniness anyway.. I also realize that some flesh and blood will treat you worse than a stranger...That's too bad and nothing that I have ever experienced... TFY 1
Robert Z Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 (edited) My mother(and to a lesser degree other members of my family) truly loves me for all I am ....No question..As I do her... Funny, what little is left of my family doesn't have a clue who I am. My mother and I were close but the rest of the family is a lost cause. Honestly, you can't spend decades with your head in physics and engineering problems and expect some people to understand your world or who you are. I will never forget the time I tried to explain Special Relativity to my father. Never mind that this is child's play and has been around since 1905, he just looked at me like I'm from Mars and was sure that I had no idea what I'm talking about. Honestly it was very hurtful at the time but in retrospect, it was simply beyond him. The concepts were just too radical for him to accept. And that is just the tip of the iceberg of my world, especially then, so there was no hope left of him ever understanding anything about my world. So there was no hope of him understanding me or giving me any credibility [apparently the degrees didn't matter!]. And he was one of the most technical of the bunch. It is ironic but strangers are far more likely to appreciate me for who I am, than any family member . Edited June 10, 2015 by Robert Z 1
MoreAmore Posted June 10, 2015 Posted June 10, 2015 We all have our weak moments, but enough people HAVE fallen for me that it doesn't constantly take hold, both when I could return emotion and when I could not.
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