fred123 Posted June 8, 2015 Posted June 8, 2015 Has anyone every experienced talking to someone and you both like each other and the person you are talking to says they are excites to see you and hang out with you etc then when you finally meet they are very cold? Have any girls done this to a guy before and what is the reason why you guys lose interest or turn cold? Why say before that you are genuinely excited to see you and spend time with you and get my hopes up?!
Toodaloo Posted June 8, 2015 Posted June 8, 2015 Don't worry Fred. This is when people build up an "imaginary friend" rather than build up a true relationship with you. Its also when people are a bit wary and a bit scared because they have developed feelings and emotions and they are not overly sure about all that... Just let it go. As someone else keeps saying never hold expectations. Its not real until you meet in person. 1
Author fred123 Posted June 8, 2015 Author Posted June 8, 2015 Ok. Is it wrong to feel excited though that im finally meeting the person? Is it ok to feel hurt? Surely people can still be friendly even though they dont lile the person/attracted/changed their mind? 1
Popsicle Posted June 8, 2015 Posted June 8, 2015 Has anyone every experienced talking to someone and you both like each other and the person you are talking to says they are excites to see you and hang out with you etc then when you finally meet they are very cold? Have any girls done this to a guy before and what is the reason why you guys lose interest or turn cold? Why say before that you are genuinely excited to see you and spend time with you and get my hopes up?! Yes but only when I've meet the person online, then in person there was no attraction and/or chemistry.
Popsicle Posted June 8, 2015 Posted June 8, 2015 Ok. Is it wrong to feel excited though that im finally meeting the person? Is it ok to feel hurt? Surely people can still be friendly even though they dont lile the person/attracted/changed their mind? Yes it's ok. I'm sorry. Maybe they are afraid to hurt you.
Redhead14 Posted June 8, 2015 Posted June 8, 2015 Has anyone every experienced talking to someone and you both like each other and the person you are talking to says they are excites to see you and hang out with you etc then when you finally meet they are very cold? Have any girls done this to a guy before and what is the reason why you guys lose interest or turn cold? Why say before that you are genuinely excited to see you and spend time with you and get my hopes up?! Because at the time they are enamored with the "vision" they have for you. But when they actually see you, you aren't quite what they had envisioned. It doesn't mean you're ugly or anything , it's just "different" for them when they actually see you.
GemmaUK Posted June 8, 2015 Posted June 8, 2015 I can be excited/look forward to meeting someone. You can only tell if any attraction is there when you meet face to face anyway though so it's best never to invest anything more than some intrigue in meeting them and seeing what they are like IRL. If attraction isn't there then I won't be flirty with them as that could be seen as leading them on.
Dork Vader Posted June 8, 2015 Posted June 8, 2015 It's one thing too communicate with a person and form a "cyber" relationships with them, it's entirely different to have a real life relationship with them. I've had this happen numerous times in person and been on both ends of it. Some of the things that have made me turn cold.. 1. they make political statements I do not agree with. 2. They make statements about morals or values that I do not agree with. 3. They are over weight and did not look over weight in their pictures. It's one thing to be a tad chunkier but entirely different too look like an average build and be 40lbs or more over weight. 4. They are overly physical or want sex too quickly. It's a major turn off because if it's that easy for me, it's that easy for everyone. It can be numerous things and it happens for numerous reason. The point is that you two did NOT click in real life, SO MOVE ON.
Toodaloo Posted June 9, 2015 Posted June 9, 2015 Ok. Is it wrong to feel excited though that im finally meeting the person? Is it ok to feel hurt? Surely people can still be friendly even though they dont lile the person/attracted/changed their mind? Of course it is Fred. There would be something wrong if you were not looking forward to meeting that person! The trick is not to get too attached until you have had a few dates. OLD is weird. People pick up and drop others at the drop of a hat - someone on here once described it as shopping on Amazon... I guess it is because they know that they are unlikely to meet you again in real life. You get some absolute gems and some real odd balls...! Once you can accept that and learn not to take it personally and just use it as a tool its fine! Some who use it are just bored, some are looking for a hook up, some are socially inept, some are lovely, some are vile... Just like real life its a random selection of all sorts of people. Everyone I know who uses it struggles with it. Myself included. Try to meet them as soon as possible so you can save time and your emotions.
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