OLD Photo trickery / heavyset women

June 7, 2015

A woman I used to work with used to lie about her age and put up doctored photos. We warned her it wasn't a good idea but she didn't listen. Some men walked out straight away, others had sex with her first then walked. She used to ask her own kids not to let on about her age, she said she hoped by the time the men found out her true age they would have fallen for her.... Of course that never worked. None of the good ones took it beyond the first date, only those did that didn't care.

I don't understand lying about age either. In this day and age it is quite easy to verify one's age before ever even meeting.....sites like Intellius, Spokeo and others provide a person's age, marital status, for a very small fee.

Often times all you have to do is Google someone and their age will pop up! My boyfriend's age pops up when you google him...

So it is really kinda silly to lie about it.

Before the internet, it was easy to get away with it though. I worked with this woman who fooled her own husband into believing she was 10 years younger for their entire marriage!

They are divorced now and he probably STILL does not know her real age. This was about 15 years ago...before the internet.

June 7, 2015

In some cases there is s big difference. Smokers age badly. Also depending on how hormone changes hit someone's body, aging accelerates.

The difference is no, you don't necessarily know their real age because people lie, and even if it says they're 40 and thats' true, but their photo is really them at 30, yes, it makes a big difference. But the most important thing is now you know they're a liar.

June 7, 2015

Are men offended when women ask for good, recent full length shots before the meet up/date?

Yes but we are not supposed to express when we are only woman can do that.

June 7, 2015

The problem with photos is they could have been taken 10 years ago. So even if you ask for a recent pic, they might well just post an old one. If you're the kind of person (and most of us are) who are picky about it, then OLD is certainly not the best answer. But now with Instagram and all that, you may be able to tell someone is putting up new photos all the time. But honestly only young pretty people and women with kids' photos seem to use those photo apps very much. The rest of us aren't trying to show off anything.

June 7, 2015

I've been out with guys who have subtracted anywhere from 4 to 13 years off their age. And added 1 to 6 inches to their height. 6 inches! lol And subtracted up to 50 pounds from their weight. Posted pictures of themselves from at least 10 years ago.

I didn't photoshop or distort my pictures, and I don't think it's a good idea. But I kind of get it. Every celeb/model photo that men see online, in mags, and on TV/movies has been heavily doctored, so I guess they figure that's the "competition" and they'd better play the game using the same weapons to compete. If you see a celeb in real life without the good lighting, angles, photoshop airbrushing, etc., most people would be taken aback by how imperfect and flawed they look, too.

How could you tell if it was 4 years? lol Is there a difference between someone who is 35 and 39?

June 7, 2015

Someone should create a brand new intrusive OLD site to combat these issues.

They could make dating trading cards for both men and women who enter into this OLD site. They'd be similar to Pokemon cards.

They would require monthly time framed photos of them on a scale and implement mug shot front and side profile pictures to gage looks as well as actually height.

These cards would require transcripts of GPA, ACT scores, and monthly pay stubs that show the employer and amount. This way we know intelligence while simultaneously filtering through the gold diggers and liars.

We'll also hire private investigators to interview friends and family of the site users to correctly find out their number of sexual parters and have them recorded on playing cards as well.

This way everything is out in the open right off the bat!

June 7, 2015

Hahahaha bloody Photoshop off pounds. Killing me. IDK what advise to give, beyond become familiar with layne Bryants clothing line. Larger women do not have as many clothing options as smaller. Lots of nicer clothing designers do not bother with larger sizes, they make high fashion and do not with to be associated with the xxxl Wal-Mart demographic.

June 7, 2015

I guess the only way I can full shot body photo is when I am out with family at a restaurant and ask one of my relatives to take a picture of me by myself

But they may still wonder why and realize I may want it for a dating profile

June 7, 2015

I have mixed feelings about all this. On the one hand, I understand the frustration of running into people online who misrepresent themselves, but at the same time, I find it a bit small-minded to limit this kind of behavior to large women trying to lure in unsuspecting men through their photographic wizardry.

Bottom line, we all misrepresent ourselves in some way. You write a résumé to reflect the best parts of your work history; you use certain verbiage to make it seem as if you're more adept than maybe you really are. People omit all the time on OLD that they have children, or were previously married, or that they simply lead more interesting lives than they actually do. You don't find out about the money problems or the small addition til later. Is that not misrepresentation, either?

Granted, lying about physical aspects is just shooting oneself in the foot, because those are misrepresentations that are discovered straight away. Many of the men I met gave themselves a few extra inches of height (6-foot instead of 5'10"); one was probably a good 60 pounds heavier than his profile pic; and many only had photos of themselves with hats or sunglasses on, making it impossible to see their faces clearly. Misrepresentations, all.

So whether in photo or in self-description, there's always a chance that people are lying. What about those who claim to be looking for a long-term relationship, only to really want to get into your pants? How is that not a waste of someone's time? I went on many dates with men who I never heard from after date one or two, after their attempts at getting laid failed. Wow, that was such a waste of my time, if we're gonna look at it that way.

Also, I think that sometimes (not in all cases), the story is a bit more complicated than some woman trying to "trick" a man. In my case, I used to be extremely overweight. I'm still about 15 lbs technically overweight, but spent a lot of time and effort losing weight and getting into shape. I'm committed to working out. Do I have the body of a fitness model? Hell no. I don't even have the body composition of someone who had always been this weight. I have excess skin in places, and cellulite in others, but my measurements are quite small. Am I curvy? Not really, actually. I'm quite boxy. I don't think people see me as a "fat person," but I'm certainly not slender. However, I AM fit (from a cardiovascular perspective), and into fitness, but people would probably not see me that way.

So what should a woman like me do on OLD? I didn't necessarily want to reveal all that weight loss in my profile, it's a very personal thing. I included a full body shot, which was taken by a friend of mine who's a professional headshot photog, and described my body type as, "a little extra," which felt more accurate than curvy, average, or overweight. However, since it IS important to me to be with someone who likes to be active and have a healthy lifestyle, I did include that in my profile. I hope no one came across that and said, " how dare she expect those standards," because they didn't know the whole story.

Anyway, I was never inundated with messages. But the pool of men I did attract seemed please with the real-life presentation once we met, for the most part at least. Sorry, I feel like I'm rambling, but I guess my point is that the issue of online misrepresentation is much broader and complicated than, "how do I navigate around all these lying fatties?"

June 7, 2015

Haha.. I honestly try to man. But as I said before, the full body shots I do see look fine. Plus, my profile is very clear on my preferences, lifestyle, etc.. So I honestly don't get what these women are thinking when they contact me, and see the process through to meeting me in person.

Do they think I won't notice that they're at least 8-12 sizes bigger than they claimed to be?

I wouldn't be happy either.. Maybe be a little more blunt in your profile. I feel lucky that never happened to me but on a couple of occasions. They were only 20-30lbs over what they "claimed to be" in their pictures..

June 7, 2015

I haven't got further than the first page but this thread has REALLY piddled me off.

The only full body photos I have are from 3-4 years ago and I was REALLY FAT. I don't like pictures being taken off me. It makes me feel like I am attention seeking and makes me feel weird and self conscience.

In 7-8 years with my ex there are only 3 photos of us together in existence.

So yes I only have face shots because its all I have that is recent and I want to give an honest representation.

I have a fat arse. I have thunder thighs. I have bossoms that can knock a man out at 30 paces if I turn round fast. Its like having weapons of mass destruction on both your front and back end. It doesn't change when I am skinny or fat... They will ALWAYS be big no matter what I do unless I take a knife to myself and operate.

I work long hours and have a medical condition that means that I am in pain around about 98% of the time. This means that when I go running, go to the gym or use up energy IT HURTS and I can't move. SO I am constantly balancing between getting exercise and doing as much as I can with out it affecting my work and my ability to pay the bills.

I am a UK size 16/18 because of my fat arse. My waist is 32". My boobs are a 32E, my arse I give up on measuring because its just depressing. I am curvy. There is sod all I can do about it and quite frankly reading crap about how people like me are "lazy" because we do not go to the gym enough or that we are unhealthy because we clearly eat the wrong foods or eat too much... Well F you. Try living on the amounts I eat and do what I do each day.

My best friend calls me the duracel bunny for a reason. I am constantly on the go and active. I am strong enough to lift and maneuver heavy steel beams but no I can't run for a few miles. I keep trying but I just can't do it.

If you think I am fat or unhealthy its really not my problem. Its yours.

In the past year I have lost in excess of 4 stones by reverting back to the habits I had and enjoyed before my ex was around. I haven't done anything special I just got happy. By all means encourage me but to slate people like me because we have a wobble on our bellies is just so utterly pathetic.

Walk away from people like me because we sure as s*** do not need this attitude... It will only make us miserable and FAT!

I have said my piece and have had enough of this whole subject.

June 7, 2015

^^^^

Tood, you do realize the focus of the thread is on women who lie about themselves and intentionally deceive right? It's got nothing to do with weight or dress size in general.

If a woman claims to be one way with description and the photos she provides, and then shows up being way bigger than she lead on, that is deceptive behavior. On the other hand, if a woman is honest, straight forward, and owns who she is, I respect that a lot actually.

But once again, the point of this thread is deception.

June 7, 2015

I think people clearly lie and miss-represent themselves, their weight, age or whatever else as means of attracting the most candidates as possible. Clearly, guys/girls that are much more heavier than they let on are trying to charm the person before they ever meet. Wow them w/how funny they are or how fun they appear.

This one girl I may of already mentioned did that to me. I was a bit suspicious of her pictures but she was very vocal about how often she worked out and how important fitness was to her. We spoke several times on the phone (with her ringing me most of the time). She was fun, personable, witty, etc.. When I finally agreed to meet her, it was for lunch. I just had a feeling that something was amiss.

As I was walking into the restaurant to meet the first time, this woman who was 20-30lbs heavier than she claimed, called my name. I said to myself "why didn't you listen to your gut!".. We went in and I ate a sandwich and chatted with her. I will say I was a bit pissed that she lied as well. I was nice, walked her to her car, we made out for 30 minutes (ok, I'm kidding), gave her a quick hug and left. She texted 20 minutes later asking what I thought. I told her I didn't feel a connection. She then texted a nude picture of herself at a much lighter weight and said "you'll never get your hands on this body then".. I could only feel sorry for her.

The other, not being up front story from meeting from a dating site was a gal I met, really liked and saw a lot for the first month. She said she had two boys but didn't introduce them until she felt it was going somewhere. The kids were always asleep when I went over there. She waited till we got pretty serious a couple of months in and then I discovered one of her boys had was very special needs. When she told me her eyes were burning into mine, looking for my reaction.. I didn't know how to feel that she held that news back until I was attached to her. It didn't matter and wasn't a deal breaker as I liked both boys. We dated for almost a year but she had other issues that made us not compatible.

Online dating can really test us, that's for sure. Keep an open mind, filter, filter, filter before meeting, always chat with them on the phone before you meet them in person, trust your gut and know you'll have to meet quite a few candidates before finding your prince/princess.

June 7, 2015

All the full body pics I come across online always make a woman look at least 8-10 sizes smaller than she actually is. Are they starting to offer college courses in photo trickery for heavyset women that use OLD?

I'm able to see the humor and irony since I'm passionate about fitness and a personal trainer. But after awhile it does get frustrating when 85% of the women I meet from OLD wind up being size 18-24. I mean these are all women who claim to be "athletic", "curvy", and heavily into fitness. It's funny because my ideal woman physically would be a size 10-12 carrying 15-20 extra lbs of boobs, hips, and ass in a healthy way. But huge difference between that and obese.

Is there a somewhat polite and tactful way to take precaution? When I try to ask for a recent full body pic before meeting, a woman either gets offended because she thinks it's sexually motivated or it's more of the same photo trickery. So aside from asking for a woman's dress size straight out, I am at a loss at what to do.

I'm an 8-10 with about 20 extra pounds on me, so I get it. I'd be offended if someone was trying to pass themselves off as my size, only to be so much larger.

I actually see nothing wrong with asking, even if it comes across as sexually motivated. She obviously knows sexual attraction is key to a relationship getting off the ground (because it is!), otherwise she wouldn't be presenting herself in a way she thinks maximizes on her sexual attractiveness.

There are lots of guys who post pics in only hats or not smiling. I see nothing wrong with asking for a pic without the hat and showing teeth, for the same reason as you'd want a full-body pic.

June 7, 2015

Rule of thumb for OLD: if girls only post face shots, 99% of the time they're on the big side.

That is an exaggerative statement lol.

I only posted 1 photo, neck up, and I'm certainly not big.

I'm tall, 5'8, and listed that, but I'm rather small in size. To avoid misconstruing anything, I put "average" for my body type. Can't go wrong there.

I wasn't hiding anything, I just quite simply did not want to be ogled or contacted or judged based on my body.

June 7, 2015

That is an exaggerative statement lol.

I only posted 1 photo, neck up, and I'm certainly not big.

I'm tall, 5'8, and listed that, but I'm rather small in size. To avoid misconstruing anything, I put "average" for my body type. Can't go wrong there.

I wasn't hiding anything, I just quite simply did not want to be ogled or contacted or judged based on my body.

If you're "quite small," then you're far from "average."

June 7, 2015

Y'all should watch "Catfish". There's some messed up stuff on that show. Way more manipulative stuff than favorable camera angles and neck up shots.

June 7, 2015

Uh.

Who gives a ****? You have the person's age.

You're saying there's a big difference if they are 40 years old and look 35 because they used an older picture or are 40 years old and look 45?

They're 40 years old. They're going to age anyway if you stay with them. Are we shopping for used cars?

OK then it's fine for a fat lady to use a picture of when she was thinner?

June 7, 2015

I just decided to take a gander at what of pictures women in the Los Angeles area (my regular dating pool) were posting online, and they seem to be doing just fine on figuring out what kinds of photos to post.

Many of them have several photos if not more, and most of them have at least partial body shots, where you can easily get an impression of their potential body size even if it's from the upper chest area on up. If you've been OLD before, you kind of know what to look out for and it's not that hard...I wouldn't feel like these women are intentionally trying to misrepresent themselves unless these are really dated photos, which all seem to be pretty current.

Some of them have a little bit of a "glamorous" type of photo there, but that's perfectly fine because they also have photos which are just your everyday photo from an iphone or what not...and really, that's all you need.

I personally prefer very natural not so done up photos where you can just see the woman looking as you normally would expect someone to look in real life...I think the pressure to look fabulous is a bit exaggerated based on what I'm seeing here.

I'm 34 years old, I know the effects of make-up and cropping, and I don't really need someone to list their body-weight if they have current body photos. I wouldn't expect people to post pictures of themselves in their pajamas, or what they looked like after a 16 hour day with 2 hours of sleep.

Now if I were to meet these women IRL and they looked completely different from their photos, of course I would feel misled. And If I for whatever reason found them to be much less attractive because of that, it's not my responsibility to sit there and be Mr. Nice guy and justify her behavior...although I would anyway, but I wouldn't be doing it for her I'd be doing it for my own standards and respect.

In the meantime, I'd just feel awkward and uncomfortable but I'd be putting a big effort not to reveal that...and since they don't know, they probably wouldn't have a clue or an idea. Now if they are not attractive to me, it doesn't mean I can't treat them like a human-being...but I wouldn't be making a romantic effort, and if she feels that I was judgmental or discriminating against her for whatever reason that's her own damn problem.

I have seen plenty of people delusional before, and personally I make a big effort not to misrepresent myself...therefore I often under represent myself, because there's nothing more disappointing to me than setting that expectation high then utterly falling somewhere way below it.

I know there are some people though, who will never cease to stop misrepresenting their age and physical appearance whether it be weight or youth, but that's their decision and I should have a right to avoid them...if they get pissed off then IMO that's what they get, they brought it on themselves.

But it's reality to an extent that we all are, to some degree trying to smudge out the negatives or something less than desirable if there is something there that would lead to an automatic judgment or rejection without the "chance"...but do so at your own risk, knowing that some "white lies" are not so white and more significant than others, some being major deal-breakers for others, therefore be prepared to suffer the consequences for those decisions..which of course most people will never do because they expected to be accepted for it, even after the deception.

June 7, 2015

If you're "quite small," then you're far from "average."

I don't really see it that way.

I'm slender. A bit of muscle, and a bit of fat. Fairly ordinary. Nothing extreme in any direction.

I'm not rail thin, I'm not super muscular, and I'm not overweight. I'm just in the middle, which is average.

June 7, 2015

Also, I want to say for the record that hiking IS NOT REAL EXERCISE. Are you moving? Yes. Does it get your heart rate up a little? Sure. But it's mainly for the scenery. One common trend with all these "fit" women that I encounter is that their only form of exercise winds up being hiking.

One of my friends asked me to go over her profile and she has hiking on it. I asked her about it and she said: "I hike. Every day, I hike to my mailbox and back."

The biggest complaint you hear from men on OLD is meeting fat women.

I'm pretty sure the biggest complaint you hear from men on OLD is about the lack of responses.

Hahahaha.. The old drive by tactic.

Another approach is to meet her at a venue where someone you know is working. I had my favorite bartender screen for me.

The problem with photos is they could have been taken 10 years ago. So even if you ask for a recent pic, they might well just post an old one.

You can probably ask for a recent, unedited photo. Most people are not technical enough to edit EXIF data.

June 7, 2015

I never tried online dating but really I have a hard time with being all enraged and calling people liars because they tried to use the most flattering picture they had of themselves, if I were fat or bald or had a double chin, bad teeth or whatever I would naturally look for a picture of me that didn't feature that and where I looked in a way I'd like to look.

Like do you feel that if she has bad teeth she is a dishonest scumbag if she isn't showing them all off in a big toothy smile in her profile or is this harsh judgement just reserved for the dreaded FAT WOMEN??!?

I do understand though being bummed out when you meet them and see how they really look but why not just look at it as "not attracted to them" instead of how they are literally a big FAT liar! I mean why not just be polite and move on hoping to find one you really do like who is not fat?

June 7, 2015

If you're "quite small," then you're far from "average."

And you're limiting your chances at guys who think like most OLD veterans, "oh, she's hiding something with only a head shot"..

If you had full body shots, I guarantee you that you'd get more attention. Not just from guys looking to get laid but guys that need to feel attracted to someone before contacting them.

I've seen some of your hilarious posts and these guys are missing seeing that side of you since your limiting your chances w/only a head shot.

June 7, 2015

I never tried online dating but really I have a hard time with being all enraged and calling people liars because they tried to use the most flattering picture they had of themselves, if I were fat or bald or had a double chin, bad teeth or whatever I would naturally look for a picture of me that didn't feature that and where I looked in a way I'd like to look.

Like do you feel that if she has bad teeth she is a dishonest scumbag if she isn't showing them all off in a big toothy smile in her profile or is this harsh judgement just reserved for the dreaded FAT WOMEN??!?

I do understand though being bummed out when you meet them and see how they really look but why not just look at it as "not attracted to them" instead of how they are literally a big FAT liar! I mean why not just be polite and move on hoping to find one you really do like who is not fat?

I think the point of this thread is many people are very frank and open about what they like and dislike in potential partners. I've read tons of women's profiles where they state to NOT contact them if- Your bald, overweight, less than 6', have bad teeth, are over a certain age, are married (duh) and other things. I'm fine with women telling me what they look for in their guys in their profile. I did the same in my profile.

Now, say a guy read that from a women's profile, and still managed to talk his way into a meet with her by being less than honest in emails or phone calls. She then discovered meeting him the first time that the guy was 5'7", 40lbs overweight, badly balding w/poor teeth. She's going to be pissed to say the least.

June 7, 2015

Yeah it happened to me, chick showed up 50lbs heavier than her pics, talkin' bout she gain a few pounds over the last couple weeks I don't know if they were Photoshop ed or just old.

3 other gals got me using angles. Looked nothing like in their pics.

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OLD Photo trickery / heavyset women

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