Ryan0627 Posted June 5, 2015 Posted June 5, 2015 This guy emailed me on a dating site and we started talking and I asked him out and got his number. We scheduled a date last weekend and just before the I was going to pick him up he text me and asked if we could push the date up an hour and I and said sure and then just before I was about to pick him up again he text me to say that something came up and he wouldn't be able to make it so we rescheduled for the next day and then he did the same exact thing. The next morning I told him that if he doesn't want to go on a date anymore to just tell me instead of leading me on and he replied and said that he still really does want to go on a date with me so we rescheduled again for later that day but something legitimately came up for me that needed my attention so I told him that something came up and we'd have to postpone yet again and he said that he understood. The next day we were going to schedule another date but he turned the tables on me and gave me a taste of my own medicine for when I had to postpone the day before. I'll admit, although something really did come up, I used that to my advantage to give him a taste of his own medicine. He asked both times if we could move the date time up an hour which is one of the reasons I think he's nervous or insecure because his nerves probably got to him and he wanted to syke himself up. Needless to say he hasn't texted me for the past 3 days. The only explanation I can come up with for his flakeyness is that he's shy and keeps syking himself out. I really like him and can't stop thinking about him so I want to think he stopped texting because he's embarrassed or something. What do you guys think and what should I do?
Fleur de cactus Posted June 5, 2015 Posted June 5, 2015 I think he is not interested. Stop asking him out. Give yourself a break, dont keep pushing but you can continue chatting without asking him out, and see how he is interested in just friendship and not dating. Ask how he has been and other conversation. If he is maintain contact with you, you can reconsider asking him out.
Fleur de cactus Posted June 5, 2015 Posted June 5, 2015 I forget to mention something, online dating if full of scammers. Even if you have pics, it may be a different person. He may say that he is somewhere but he is far away and cannot meet with you. He may want to play a game with you and see how he can manipulate you. Be careful!!
minime13 Posted June 5, 2015 Posted June 5, 2015 This guy emailed me on a dating site and we started talking and I asked him out and got his number. We scheduled a date last weekend and just before the I was going to pick him up he text me and asked if we could push the date up an hour and I and said sure and then just before I was about to pick him up again he text me to say that something came up and he wouldn't be able to make it so we rescheduled for the next day and then he did the same exact thing. The next morning I told him that if he doesn't want to go on a date anymore to just tell me instead of leading me on and he replied and said that he still really does want to go on a date with me so we rescheduled again for later that day but something legitimately came up for me that needed my attention so I told him that something came up and we'd have to postpone yet again and he said that he understood. The next day we were going to schedule another date but he turned the tables on me and gave me a taste of my own medicine for when I had to postpone the day before. I'll admit, although something really did come up, I used that to my advantage to give him a taste of his own medicine. He asked both times if we could move the date time up an hour which is one of the reasons I think he's nervous or insecure because his nerves probably got to him and he wanted to syke himself up. Needless to say he hasn't texted me for the past 3 days. The only explanation I can come up with for his flakeyness is that he's shy and keeps syking himself out. I really like him and can't stop thinking about him so I want to think he stopped texting because he's embarrassed or something. What do you guys think and what should I do? First rule of thumb with OLD - don't get so attached to a person you've never met. There is no reason why you should really like him or can't stop thinking about him when you haven't even managed to go on a first date. As far as he goes: he sounds immature and certainly not as interested as you. Move on. He's probably bumped the dates - stalling for an hour and then cancelling when you're supposed to actually be out on a date, because he's pursuing others. This doesn't come across as shyness. Don't bother with him anymore, and try not to crush so hard on someone's dating profile next time. 1
aloneinaz Posted June 5, 2015 Posted June 5, 2015 Mini nailed it. First of all, him pushing the date back an hour then cancelling it is BS. If a girl did that to me, I'd delete her phone number and move on. Like Mini said, don't get so wrapped up in one person on a dating site. Try to have multiple candidates on the hook. This way, you'll say oh well next time someone turns into a flake and delete them. I wouldn't waste another second on this guy.
Redhead14 Posted June 6, 2015 Posted June 6, 2015 This guy emailed me on a dating site and we started talking and I asked him out and got his number. We scheduled a date last weekend and just before the I was going to pick him up he text me and asked if we could push the date up an hour and I and said sure and then just before I was about to pick him up again he text me to say that something came up and he wouldn't be able to make it so we rescheduled for the next day and then he did the same exact thing. The next morning I told him that if he doesn't want to go on a date anymore to just tell me instead of leading me on and he replied and said that he still really does want to go on a date with me so we rescheduled again for later that day but something legitimately came up for me that needed my attention so I told him that something came up and we'd have to postpone yet again and he said that he understood. The next day we were going to schedule another date but he turned the tables on me and gave me a taste of my own medicine for when I had to postpone the day before. I'll admit, although something really did come up, I used that to my advantage to give him a taste of his own medicine. He asked both times if we could move the date time up an hour which is one of the reasons I think he's nervous or insecure because his nerves probably got to him and he wanted to syke himself up. Needless to say he hasn't texted me for the past 3 days. The only explanation I can come up with for his flakeyness is that he's shy and keeps syking himself out. I really like him and can't stop thinking about him so I want to think he stopped texting because he's embarrassed or something. What do you guys think and what should I do? You should leave it alone. Nothing you said above indicates he embarrassed or shy at all. You have no basis for making any kind of assumptions. Until he keeps good communication, makes and keeps dates and it is clear he is focused on you, you don't think about him. You "really liking him and not being able to stop thinking about a man you've never met, is actually about neediness and almost desperation and that will come across to him when/if you meet him. Keep these things in check. Manage your emotions and expectations when you're dating. If a man cancels more than once without a really good reason, you move on. 1
preraph Posted June 6, 2015 Posted June 6, 2015 He just sounds like a flake with a lot of pokers in the fire. And other places. Unless all you want is a hookup, I'd cross him off the list.
Author Ryan0627 Posted July 6, 2015 Author Posted July 6, 2015 Me and him actually have met in person. We went on 3 dates total so I didn't get attatched tonsomeone I haven't met in real life. I also know he isn't playing games because he hasn't been on his dating profile in a couple weeks and he hasn't posted any pics of him and any other guys on his facebook and instagram. When we went on our first date he showed me the scars that he had left over from when he used to cut himself.
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