LookAtThisPOst Posted June 5, 2015 Posted June 5, 2015 It seems a lot of people I come across that are out looking for their next "someone" seems to have some kind of related issue when breaking things off with an ex. He/she was an alcoholic/substance abuser...mostly alcoholism. It seems every woman I meet always had a boyfriend or ex-husband that was an alcoholic. I think this even trumps infidelity even. But first off, how could you have not known your future someone to be an alcoholic? When they go out on dates, they hide it by ordering one drink, take you home, and then binge drink when they get home?
Art_Critic Posted June 5, 2015 Posted June 5, 2015 The Alcoholic can be a silver tongued devil, charismatic and can present great game so many women fall for the Alcoholic before they realize he is one, then they believe he will change or they can fix him so the cycle continues until they decide to end it... I don't find it unusual that most women have had a relationship with someone who has addiction issues, the key word is HAD.. 2
Satu Posted June 5, 2015 Posted June 5, 2015 My experiences with alcoholics have led me to think they are often superficially charming, but lack a sense of personal responsibility.
preraph Posted June 6, 2015 Posted June 6, 2015 Two things. First of all, I have never in my vicarious 62 years seen a couple where one person used substances and the other did not. But how it becomes a frequent problem is at least in my generation, ALL young people pretty much experimented a lot and every generation of a certain age drank. Of course, out of that group a certain percentage will have hereditary addiction problems and it will become a big problem for them. But when you are a young person and you're both living the good life, working and playing and having a lot of fun on weekends, you don't think anything of it. But then you get to be about 30 or you start having kids and one person decides they're tired of partying and trying to get up in the morning, and they realize the other person isn't following suit and might just keep drinking a six pack and getting stoned until they are 90. It's normal for young people to party and do things a bit to excess. They are young. Their bodies can take it. Most people bore of it after some years. For me, I started very early and peeled it way back when I got my first job I was really into. It became my focus. But some people, addicts or simple slackers, never get tired of it or they're addicted to whatever it is and you have to get away from them. Having kids makes it imperative you make some changes, too, and things will quickly come to a head when one spouse is up all night and all day with the baby while the other drinks or smokes until he passes out and can't be bothered. The combined wisdom of my close old group of hard partying friends from my youth is if a person isn't slowing down by 30-something, time to start worrying and talking to them about it.
Emilia Posted June 6, 2015 Posted June 6, 2015 Yes you can tell almost straight away, 2nd date max. An alcoholic can't do anything without the support of the bottle. It's more that people hope that it will change if they speak some sense into them. It takes a while to realise what a debilitating illness it is.
Recommended Posts