Plaster Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 So after NC for 3 days ( 5 weeks since break up.. It's all over here) she called me last night. Now I didn't answer at first, or second time or third time but I then got a message saying she needs me and begged me. To answer. I thought it was an emergency so I answered. So anyway turns out it wasn't, and she was apologising for being a dick to me and saying how she loves me and is never going to be truly happy without me and was really lovely. She keeps thinking about me etc . We were going to see each other today. So it gets to the time I was meant to ring her to meet her and she answers and has this front up. Now this front I have seen since we have split up (I don't care etc sort of thing) and is a dick to me and basically we didn't meet. I'm not too upset as I knew this would happen. But gutted too. Just goes to show that NC is the best. I. Going to send her a ****ty message letting her know she's causing me again and if she really does care she will leave my life. I don't want to be any thing else other than her partner and if she doesn't want that then she can't have anything to do with me and il block her number. On a better note my fitness is going through the roof and I am doing very well at work and kickboxing and I had a lovely date the other night. I'm getting through this. It's her that's the problem. She is my source of pain. She's a dick. I love her but she's a dick.
Keenly Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 If you send her the message, you will be letting her know how much power she has over you. If you truly want this pain to end, YOU need to be the one that ends it. No more answering. Get an app that just blocks your phone from ringing when that person calls. (Mr. Number on Android) Don't allow her to use your emotions against you. Be in control of your feelings, Luke. 4
minime13 Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 Don't send her a message to let her know anything. Just stop responding to her, and block all communication. That's how NC works. It isn't NC if you're always going to send a message first. 1
Thecondor1991 Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 Block her. Agreed. Kick this chick aside like you would kick something in kickboxing. 1
Author Plaster Posted June 2, 2015 Author Posted June 2, 2015 Your all right. This is why I love this forum. I've always said 'the third party always sees clearest'. Prime example. I will block her now. F her. Apart from my emotions I'm doing better without her. 2
Lizrd3000 Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 You love a dick? (nohomo?) You really don't have to send her that text message. She's a dick, like you've said. Just tell her you're done with her confusing hot and cold behaviour, and you're pulling the plug on this contact thingy that's going on. You're broken up, act like it. You don't owe her a reason for you wanting her out of your life, none at all.
aloneinaz Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 Nothing speaks louder than dead silence from you. People HATE to be ignored as it tells them you don't even care enough to reply. Any contact you provide to her will only stroke her ego, think she still has you wrapped around her finger and provide her further entertainment. Block her on your phone and on any social media. Keep working on you and keep on dating to meet your next great love.
Author Plaster Posted June 3, 2015 Author Posted June 3, 2015 This morning I'm feeling down. It's got to me. I haven't had a morning like this for a week or so. My fault for answering her call. Time to be strong. 1
SammySammy Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 This morning I'm feeling down. It's got to me. I haven't had a morning like this for a week or so. My fault for answering her call. Time to be strong. Yep. I learned the sooner I can completely cut her off, the sooner I can start and complete my healing process. No contact is good for both you and her. Stay strong, brother. 1
Fleur de cactus Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 she is only pocking you to see how you will react. It is her power of control, she is craving for you attention, bad or good. It is her way to fix her ego. Dont repond to her. Block her, ignore her. If you respond, she will know that she is in charge!!
Emilia Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 Negative emotions are very draining OP. Make you feel like crap for days. This is a good lesson for the future to avoid drama like this. It's like a future reference.
Author Plaster Posted June 3, 2015 Author Posted June 3, 2015 All Morning I've been thinking about getting in contact with her and asking why she's doing this.. Then I came on here before I tried to get her number. The support from you guys has made me resist and feel a bit better. Nice one people! I really appreciate the help in these hard times. 1
lauri Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 All Morning I've been thinking about getting in contact with her and asking why she's doing this.. Then I came on here before I tried to get her number. The support from you guys has made me resist and feel a bit better. Nice one people! I really appreciate the help in these hard times. She is doing it because she is weak. A weak person does this to someone they know is hurting and actually cares about what they are trying to do to them. She is just trying to "win" this breakup and release all of that guilt she is feeling. It's up to you if you want to make her life easier at the expense of yourself... but you and I both know, you don't want to be that guy. You cannot keep chasing that high you get from speaking to her...it's only short term and the crash afterwards gets worse every time. I say you endure through the pain now and lose your "addiction" for her. Strong people don't get sucked into this type of BS. You know better than to stoop to her level and allow a weak person have control over you. Good on you for not contacting her and resisting.
Chi townD Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 All Morning I've been thinking about getting in contact with her and asking why she's doing this.. Then I came on here before I tried to get her number. The support from you guys has made me resist and feel a bit better. Nice one people! I really appreciate the help in these hard times. Dude, the only reason she contacted you was to pull on the leash and see if the dog was still there. After she found that she could still manipulate you, she lost interest. Good deal. Don't send that angry text because it only serves two purposes. 1. It lets her know that she can still get under your skin. 2. If you sent an angry text, then you're giving her a way to ease her guilt "If he thinks he can talk to me that way, then I'm glad to be rid of his ass!" Dude, just write her off. You have good things going for you. A healthy lifestyle and a date! Focus on that! 1
davidromero43 Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 On a better note my fitness is going through the roof and I am doing very well at work and kickboxing and I had a lovely date the other night. Fanf*ckingtastic! Good job
aloneinaz Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 Again.. she should hear dead silence from you as you VANISH from this persons life.. You owe her NOTHING. She dumped you and to reinforce her character she's playing games with you to twist the knife further. I know many people who've gotten dumped and NEVER spoke to the dumper again.. EVER.. They were in the mindset of "you dumped me, told me you don't want me in your life any further and you're going to get it".. Dumpers need to keep this mentality in mind. Get mad. Say F-her, I get the ultimate revenge by moving on to someone better. It worked for me and it can work for you.
Chi townD Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 Again.. she should hear dead silence from you as you VANISH from this persons life.. You owe her NOTHING. She dumped you and to reinforce her character she's playing games with you to twist the knife further. I know many people who've gotten dumped and NEVER spoke to the dumper again.. EVER.. They were in the mindset of "you dumped me, told me you don't want me in your life any further and you're going to get it".. Dumpers need to keep this mentality in mind. Get mad. Say F-her, I get the ultimate revenge by moving on to someone better. It worked for me and it can work for you. I'M ONE OF THOSE!!! Never talked to her again!
aloneinaz Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 I'M ONE OF THOSE!!! Never talked to her again! And it feels F'ing awesome, right! I wish more people realized how good this feels to simply vanish from a dumpers life. NC, block them on everything, delete their numbers and email. Throw out pictures, reminders and gifts. Cleanse your life of this past person. You simply heal SSOO much faster when you do this. It's not to PUNISH the dumper, it's for self preservation. As you heal and recover quicker, it allows you to get back in the game and meet your next love. Ancillary benefit? The dumper's ego is bruised. They realize they might not of been that important to the dumper. They realize they don't have the door mat as a plan B. Don't get me wrong. I don't think we should hate a dumper if they simply didn't feel it and wanted to go another direction. We've all been a dumper and hopefully we did it with class and grace. It's just that the dumpee has the right to do exactly what I said above. They owe the dumper nothing, including any further contact.
Author Plaster Posted June 3, 2015 Author Posted June 3, 2015 Yeah you guys are right. Your right about the addiction thing too. If I can give up smoking, cocaine and cannabis (used to be a very heavy user of all) then I can give up the addiction to this girl. I just don't get why she wants to play games though. Very immature and weak. But as of now I'm feeling good. Beautiful weather, day turned out well even after a crappy beginning (her on my mind and flat tyre on the motorway on the way to work) and to top it off a beautiful young lady started messaging me on my online dating profile ! Winning. 1
GoBlue Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 Stand strong and do what's right for both of you. Remember that the best way to develop a healthy and loving relationship is to be healthy yourself. Women are not tools to be used no more than you are. Love is about meeting another person's needs. Getting to that place requires time and commitment. I hope things go well for you. Be blessed! 1
joseb Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 I just don't get why she wants to play games though. Very immature and weak. . Who cares? It doesn't matter. Not your problem now you have blocked her.
Author Plaster Posted June 3, 2015 Author Posted June 3, 2015 Who cares? It doesn't matter. Not your problem now you have blocked her. I know but the question still lingers 1
Author Plaster Posted June 7, 2015 Author Posted June 7, 2015 So I have been NC since I started this. Day 5. The longest I have gone with speaking with her since we met. I just cantcan't top thinking about her. I think it's because I haven't done anything today as I've been hungover (I actually had a good night though) . All I want to do is call her. This is so hard. I miss her so much, memories have just been flooding back to me.
DexterLS Posted June 7, 2015 Posted June 7, 2015 So I have been NC since I started this. Day 5. The longest I have gone with speaking with her since we met. I just cantcan't top thinking about her. I think it's because I haven't done anything today as I've been hungover (I actually had a good night though) . All I want to do is call her. This is so hard. I miss her so much, memories have just been flooding back to me. I understand how you feel but you know what happened the last time you broke NC. Take it from a guy who broke NC several times when she wanted to talk, I ended getting hurt all the time. Stay strong and do not break NC, whatever you do.
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