StrangerThanFiction Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 I'm smack dab in the middle of an anxiety attack right now. I've been having them on and off all day and I can't seem to pinpoint the exact reason for it so I can think my way out of it like I usually do. I know it has something to do with with my ex but I don't know specifically what is causing it. I just have this feeling of a storm brewing on the horizon (metaphorically, since we haven't had rain here in weeks har har). I know most of it is due to me not having any time recently to get the last of his stuff out of my house. I know that he's going to contact me soon to come get it and I really don't want to talk to him. That's definitely a big part of it. The thought of even communicating with him through text message or email makes my skin itch. I'm literally gasping for air right now and I can't slow my heart rate down. Writing this down helps me focus more outwardly instead of inward but I'm still having a hard time calming down. Anyone have any advice on how to bring myself back down? I've been googling breathing exercises and such but they aren't working very well.
Minnie09 Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 Been there, and it's awful. Breathing exercises make me even more nervous, because they make me feel like I'm stuck on a couch not doing anything productive. Exercising helps. Going for a run and such, even though IF I get anxious it's hard for me to leave the house. I just have to force myself. If it has to do with your ex and not wanting to communicate, I can relate, as I was in the same place for some time, but I'm suggesting that you restrict it to texting. At least you won't have to talk to him. I'm assuming it's too much stuff to just put it on the front porch and leave until he's done picking it up? Especially since the weather is dry? That would be an option. But as I said, if it's too much you could just leave the door unlocked and leave the place until he's done. Just give him Directions via text. And meet up with a friend in the meantime. You can text him that you don't want to be there. Or?
Shetland Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 Everythings Gonna Be Alright - Bob Marley I listen to this song when I get an anxiety attack. It's a quick fix, and calms me down to figure out my next move. I wish I could give great words of wisdom, but sometimes the most calming phrase is that "Every little thing is gonna be alright"
ColdandLonelyinAK Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 You HAVE to get rid of his stuff. My ex was giving me the runaround for weeks about getting his stuff. I was so tired of having any possible ties to him that I had a friend drop off his crap at the barracks and text him to go get it. After, it was just a HUGE weight off of my shoulders, and I've been more happy since. Get rid of the stuff, block him on everything and you'll be amazed at what a difference it makes. You'll have peace of mind.
dyna85 Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 I think his lingering belongings aren't helping matters. I would definitely get that crap out of there as soon as possible. My suggestion is that you meditate. Set an alarm for 10 minutes and sit there quietly with eyes closed until it goes off. This always helps to quiet my mind and help me think more clearly. Always. I know it's rough. You have been through a lot and you're in the early stages. Have some chocolate too. That always helps.
aloneinaz Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 I'm smack dab in the middle of an anxiety attack right now. I've been having them on and off all day and I can't seem to pinpoint the exact reason for it so I can think my way out of it like I usually do. I know it has something to do with with my ex but I don't know specifically what is causing it. I just have this feeling of a storm brewing on the horizon (metaphorically, since we haven't had rain here in weeks har har). I know most of it is due to me not having any time recently to get the last of his stuff out of my house. I know that he's going to contact me soon to come get it and I really don't want to talk to him. That's definitely a big part of it. The thought of even communicating with him through text message or email makes my skin itch. I'm literally gasping for air right now and I can't slow my heart rate down. Writing this down helps me focus more outwardly instead of inward but I'm still having a hard time calming down. Anyone have any advice on how to bring myself back down? I've been googling breathing exercises and such but they aren't working very well. How's your diet? How much caffeine? A lot of foods can trigger anxiety or make an anxiety condition worse. Caffeine is a known anxiety contributor. Alcohol can also worsen anxiety. I agree with exercise to help calm you down. Get out and move to burn up that extra adrenaline. Meditating is good as well. Another strong vote to get rid of his stuff. Take it or have someone else take his stuff to him. The sooner it's gone, the sooner you will relax.
Author StrangerThanFiction Posted June 2, 2015 Author Posted June 2, 2015 Thank y'all so so much! Having someone say that everything is going to be alright helped immediately. I also went for a run and did some yoga which brought me down the rest of the way. Thinking back on the day, I definitely had way more caffeine than I usually do. I don't do well with caffeine on the best of days and today was not the best of days due to worry about hearing from him so that huge cup of coffee I had this morning to dispel my greater than usual sleepiness definitely spelled disaster. Never again. I'll stick to apples from now on lol. I agree that his stuff needs to be out of my house ASAP. However, my work schedule has been insane these last few weeks and I haven't been able to find the time to cart it off to a storage locker. There's not a whole lot-just a few boxes of junk-so I might just see if one of my friends can come pick it up and hold onto it for me until I can get a storage space just so it's out of my house. I don't really want him having to talk to any of my friends, though, so having him pick it up from them is out. They've hated him since we started dating 7 years ago (yeah, should've listened to them years ago) and aren't shy about stating their opinions about him to his face. Definitely drama I don't need or want at this stage. I just want him out of my life completely already! I know once his stuff is gone I will feel so free. We've been on complete NC since BU, so almost a month now, and that is just how I'd like it to stay. My life is moving on, I'm looking forward to a totally him-free future, and I just want every trace of him gone. I don't want him to have any excuse to touch my life again in any way.
aloneinaz Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 I definitely had way more caffeine than I usually do. I don't do well with caffeine on the best of days and today was not the best of days . There ya go! Caffeine can cause panic attacks and elevated anxiety in folks that don't have anxiety disorders! I know many folks that can handle MAYBE one small cup of coffee, others that can't take it at all! Another anxiety producing chemical is the fake sugars. Aspartame is famous for anxiety reactions as well. Guess what's full of it? Diet sodas and food. I agree that his stuff needs to be out of my house ASAP. I just want him out of my life completely already! I know once his stuff is gone I will feel so free. I just want every trace of him gone. I don't want him to have any excuse to touch my life again in any way. Stop making excuses in not being able to move his stuff out. You can find the time to make this happen. Make it a priority to complete this task and think how much better you'll feel!
Author StrangerThanFiction Posted June 2, 2015 Author Posted June 2, 2015 There ya go! Caffeine can cause panic attacks and elevated anxiety in folks that don't have anxiety disorders! I know many folks that can handle MAYBE one small cup of coffee, others that can't take it at all! Another anxiety producing chemical is the fake sugars. Aspartame is famous for anxiety reactions as well. Guess what's full of it? Diet sodas and food. Stop making excuses in not being able to move his stuff out. You can find the time to make this happen. Make it a priority to complete this task and think how much better you'll feel! That sounds like me lol. Even a small cup of coffee in the morning and I am jittery, anxious, and bouncing off the walls for the next 8-12 hours until I crash hard. Same goes for sugar too, actually. This reaction has only happened within the last couple of years, though. I used to drink pots and pots of coffee a day and then one day I just decided to stop drinking it completely for a couple years and now I can't handle it at all. I haven't touched soda of any kind in about 4 years, thankfully. I can't even imagine what kind of nuclear meltdown would occur if I did *shudders* You're right and I know it. I guess I've been putting it off because of the inconvenience it'll cause me but it's obviously stressing me out way than I thought and the best thing I can do is just buckle down, bite the bullet, and get it done!
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