southernYankee Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 I really like this girl I go to the same college as. We've been on 3 dates and have hung out at other times as well. Before she went home for the summer break, I brought up where we stand, so we're both on the same page. I made it clear that I'm not trying to rush things. I just wanted to know where she stood before she left for 3 months. Her answer was: "I find you very interesting, and I want to get to know you more. I think I'm on the path toward really liking you. I'm just not there yet." Based on what she said, how do you think she really feels about me and where our relationship is going? Is it just what she said? Could she have meant something more by it?
empresario Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 Unless she is turned around socially...sounds like a cop out. I know pretty damn quickly if I like someone. And as Chris Rock says...women know the second they meet you if they're going to **** you. That may be an exaggeration, but attraction is usually known pretty quickly.
Fhsjkfjrhsdh3646 Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 OP you asked too soon... 3 dates? Lol that's barely dating. That just means she doesn't find you weird and repulsive and thinks you're not completely boring. But yeah sounds like she's checking out, are you being needy with her?
aloneinaz Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 Sounds like she answered what you thought. You are were barely dating and maybe she'll restart the dating when she returns from break. In the mean time, don't be needy or smother her and go out and date and have fun with other girls. When she returns in the fall, see if she's interested in resuming the dating.
dyna85 Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 Her interest level in you sounds to be lukewarm at this juncture. Remember though, per the book 'Mars and Venus on a Date,' women are like an oven (heat up slowly), whereas men are like a blowtorch (fired up immediately), so all hope is not lost.
Author southernYankee Posted June 2, 2015 Author Posted June 2, 2015 OP you asked too soon... 3 dates? Lol that's barely dating. That just means she doesn't find you weird and repulsive and thinks you're not completely boring. But yeah sounds like she's checking out, are you being needy with her? I'm not being needy with her. Coincidentally, we lived on the same floor of the same building this past semester, so we saw each other every day or every other day. We would hang out and do homework together once or twice a week. We snapchat every once in a while. We don't text much because we see each other enough that we don't need to. But now that we probably won't see each other for 3 months, I'll text her every so often. I'm not clingy. My fear was that if we both had any sort of feelings, and we didn't talk about before she left, then those feelings would fade away over the summer. I said this as well, and she knew where i was going because she finished my sentence for me.
lovexocoach Posted June 2, 2015 Posted June 2, 2015 There hasn't been enough time for her to develop much of anything except mild interest. There is NO relationship at this point. Keep dating her, if you're still interested in her in 3 month's time. If she likes you she'll go on more dates. If she doesn't, you have your answer.
Author southernYankee Posted June 4, 2015 Author Posted June 4, 2015 When I said relationship, I didn't mean boyfriend/girlfriend. I meant the bond/interactions we have. Anyone two people have a relationship. It doesn't mean dating.
Gary S Posted June 4, 2015 Posted June 4, 2015 You say you dated 3 times and hung out with her a couple times... how long have you known her?
Author southernYankee Posted June 4, 2015 Author Posted June 4, 2015 You say you dated 3 times and hung out with her a couple times... how long have you known her? We've known each other in passing for about 4 months. We started talking and hanging out more regularly for about 2 months. I realize it's really soon. The only reason I brought this up was that, I was afraid that if we did have ANY sort of feelings, and we left for the summer without knowing how each other felt, those feelings would fade away. Then we'd get back in the fall and it'd be as if the past few months never even happened. She knew where I was going with it because she finished this sentence for me.
Gary S Posted June 4, 2015 Posted June 4, 2015 Hmmm... well, since you only had 3 dates so far, it's probably a little early. You'll probably have to date continuously for a couple of months before she could fall in love. But keep in mind, a lot of these young women under 27 are not ready to fall in love yet.
La.Primavera Posted June 4, 2015 Posted June 4, 2015 What she means is that she is not ready to be your girlfriend yet. Basically, you are free to date other people while she is gone. When she gets back, if you are both still single you can pick up where you left off.
minime13 Posted June 4, 2015 Posted June 4, 2015 Okay, so what has been the time span in which you started to date until now? 3 dates and some hanging out sounds like a couple of weeks to me. You started developing a mutual interest in each other, but it was bad timing. You're both going away (I assume) to different cities/states during summer break, so you're really not going to be able to continue dating. I would keep in touch, but not really hold onto anything, because there isn't really a relationship that has formed. Have your fun, enjoy summer, and maybe you can start dating again when you get back to school, if you're both still single.
PogoStick Posted June 4, 2015 Posted June 4, 2015 What it means is she doesn't want to be tied down because she's going to get it on with guys over the summer. If she comes back single she'll consider dating you more. You should do the same.
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