Author fifipheebs Posted June 3, 2015 Author Posted June 3, 2015 Too many of those "no's" may bruise a guy's ego so that could be a reason why he is hesitant. this is possible. he would flirt but i never really thought he meant any thing by it therefore i wouldn't really flirt back. perhaps he gave up on me? or waiting for me to give indications i am interested. or perhaps he is not even interested in me at all.
Author fifipheebs Posted June 3, 2015 Author Posted June 3, 2015 You'd be surprised. Some guys are literally terrified of going up cold shaking and all. But even those guys will eventually find themselves in a situation where they'll run into their object of affection be it a hallway at work or out in public somewhere. Usually though they'll blow their only chance by feigning disinterest because they are too nervous to initiate. Those who suffer from some form of social anxiety have it rough sometimes. this is possible as well. unless i am living a pipe dream reading into it
Daisy-oliviaWentcher Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 If I was a guy, I knew I wasn't the straight shooter but wanted a longterm relationship, possibly marriage etc... I would work on my game. I wouldn't let a history of "no's" hold me back. Last year I wasn't into this guy admittedly but he kept persisting until he got me. Even after four months and I decided it was a "no" from me, he still kept persisting. The guy had tenacity. He's probably out there asking woman out, His goal? to get married. What's wrong with that? Nothing. There is someone out there for everyone. And because he knows what he wants, he'll get it. And this guy is a obese guy who lives a lone. But he knows what he wants. I wouldn't let inexperience be a deterrent. Plenty of virgins end up with wives.
Cowboysnation Posted June 3, 2015 Posted June 3, 2015 If I was a guy, I knew I wasn't the straight shooter but wanted a longterm relationship, possibly marriage etc... I would work on my game. I wouldn't let a history of "no's" hold me back. Last year I wasn't into this guy admittedly but he kept persisting until he got me. Even after four months and I decided it was a "no" from me, he still kept persisting. The guy had tenacity. He's probably out there asking woman out, His goal? to get married. What's wrong with that? Nothing. There is someone out there for everyone. And because he knows what he wants, he'll get it. And this guy is a obese guy who lives a lone. But he knows what he wants. I wouldn't let inexperience be a deterrent. Plenty of virgins end up with wives. I will always believe that a man's confidence only comes from his bank account or his success with women.
Author fifipheebs Posted June 4, 2015 Author Posted June 4, 2015 Yes many guys are not confident and outgoing enough to do the direct approach. If you are into a guy like that then he'll literally wait weeks, months or longer (like mine did) waiting for signs that you are into him before he dives in. Some of these guys become fixated with one person for an extended period of time and unfortunately miss out on other relationships because they are mentally closed off. I say if you like him make it obvious. If he's really shy in the love department he'll always be second guessing himself and make excuses for not approaching you. Whether or not it's worth the effort to land a guy like this is your call and yours only. Some people will pass on the shy guy but I didn't and now that I got him I wouldn't trade him for the world. If the guy is quite responsive to your texts if you initiate what of that? does it mean he is just bored?
Cowboysnation Posted June 4, 2015 Posted June 4, 2015 If the guy is quite responsive to your texts if you initiate what of that? does it mean he is just bored? Well I'm a guy and if I don't want to text someone I dont response at all. If I'm bored I think of something else to do than text someone I'm I have no interest in at all. 1
katiegrl Posted June 4, 2015 Posted June 4, 2015 If the guy is quite responsive to your texts if you initiate what of that? does it mean he is just bored? IMO, it's hard to know for sure, there are so many different scenarios. He may be shy and socially awkward. He may have just ended a LTR and needs time before dating again to regroup. He may not think YOU are interested (although I doubt that is the case here)... and IS testing you... OR He may not be interested at all and simply enjoys flirting for the attention. When I was dating (before BF)... if a guy stopped contacting me, I would just go with he's just not interested and move on. I never bothered analyzing why... the reason really didn't matter to me. He has stopped contacting me...so for whatever reason, he didn't wish to date me anymore. So I would move on. Reason being, even if he WERE testing me, that would be a turn off to me because it indicates insecurity and that he resorts to games for answers. That doesn't work for me, so I would just move on. Your call though. 1
Author fifipheebs Posted June 4, 2015 Author Posted June 4, 2015 IMO, it's hard to know for sure, there are so many different scenarios. He may not think YOU are interested (although I doubt that is the case here)... and IS testing you... OR He may not be interested at all and simply enjoys flirting for the attention. . those sound most likely at me at the moment. particularly the flirting he does then pulls back. 1
loverboy69 Posted June 5, 2015 Posted June 5, 2015 If the guy is quite responsive to your texts if you initiate what of that? does it mean he is just bored? That's a great question and like the others said the answers could go all sorts of directions. Generally though if he is quite responsive it usually means he's a pleaser. He's letting you know you are important enough to him to respond. Conventional wisdom says that a guy will take the initiative if he's interested but I find a lot of guys nowadays won't so you shouldn't take it as a negative if you are the one making the initiative to converse over SMS as long as his response aren't all one word replies. At least he's responsive to you. My guy was different. He was pretty awkward. He was unresponsive to my texts. The times he would try to make conversation with me was always awkward. He would make the most off-the-wall comments that had me scratching my head? It was so awkward it became cute to me over time. He didn't become confident until after we started going out. Now he's bossy. 1
cessna Posted June 5, 2015 Posted June 5, 2015 Anyone, girl or guy, who 'tests' is immature. It's as simple as that. Anyone who is secure in themselves and confident doesn't need to play childish games. 1
Author fifipheebs Posted June 5, 2015 Author Posted June 5, 2015 That's a great question and like the others said the answers could go all sorts of directions. Generally though if he is quite responsive it usually means he's a pleaser. He's letting you know you are important enough to him to respond. Conventional wisdom says that a guy will take the initiative if he's interested but I find a lot of guys nowadays won't so you shouldn't take it as a negative if you are the one making the initiative to converse over SMS as long as his response aren't all one word replies. At least he's responsive to you. My guy was different. He was pretty awkward. He was unresponsive to my texts. The times he would try to make conversation with me was always awkward. He would make the most off-the-wall comments that had me scratching my head? It was so awkward it became cute to me over time. He didn't become confident until after we started going out. Now he's bossy. LOL. i'm glad you and your man are in a happy place. As for this one, he IS a pleaser and he amusing and flirty with his responses and appears to be enjoying the conversation. however, I'm not certain if he is just seeking attention. as you said, guys nowadays don't always have the courage and this guy is inexperienced with women, though he fakes being a ladies man like a pro. some things he has said to me makes me scratch my head. Like its extremely flirty like about making out. a moment later, he will talk about some girl walking by who is hot.
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