ThisisIt606 Posted May 31, 2015 Posted May 31, 2015 I went on a great date with a guy I met on tinder. It ended in a kiss which i definitely enjoyed. I texted the next date saying I had a good time and he said we should do it again when I'm free. We decided on a day and place this week for dinner. He texted me again last night asking how an event went that I told him I was going to. We talked a bit about our days and made some jokes about a typo I made in my text (wrote mice! instead of nice!) We strangely enough started talking about mice because of that. I described them as cute but can be feisty to which he said " I can be feisty too but generally don't run away or escape" I found that a little odd and wasn't sure if he was trying to turn the convo sexual? I told him his feisty reminded me of a shirt I saw while shopping (Though she be but little she is fierce) and sent him a pic of it. and he he didn't know why but that shirt made him actullay lol and it was "very appropriate shirt for me" He asked if I bought anything else and I told him what I got. I then told him I had to shower/wash the beach sand off me and good night and I'll ttyl. He replied: alright sounds good. Have a good night Anyways, I think the convo as been going well so far... any tips to flirt over text but not make anything TOO sexual as we have only had 1 date? I like him I'm interested to see where this goes and not have a "sex cloud" dampen things. Also, we have not texted today.... should I start up convo, or wait until tomorrow? I enjoy talking to him but not too sure how much we should be texting just yet. We seem to have an even split of starting convos but I am usually the one to say I have to show/bed/etc and end the convo.
fitnessfan365 Posted May 31, 2015 Posted May 31, 2015 Building sexual tension through flirting and banter is part of chemistry. Now I can't speak for all guys. But me personally, I need a lot of mental stimulation. So when a woman intentionally avoids flirting because she worries about me "only wanting sex" I get really bored. The ironic thing is that I actually like to wait to have sex. But what's just as hot for me is anticipation that develops. So my advice? Lighten up a bit. If a guy tries to sext and get really specific, that's one thing. But don't go out of your way to avoid flirting and banter. In the end, you control when you have sex. So just because you have some playful flirting/benter/innuendo, doesn't mean that you'll be having sex right away. But if you go out of your way to talk to a guy like a platonic friend all the time, that's exactly how he'll end up seeing you.
Author ThisisIt606 Posted May 31, 2015 Author Posted May 31, 2015 Would he still see me as a platonic friend even after a kiss and a 2nd date lined up? I just thought it was odd he described HIMSELF is feisty and "doesn't usually run away or hide". To be feisty just seems more like a feminine word/used to describe a woman. Not a guy describing himself. I'll admit I did look up text flirting tips online and they are all HORRIBLE, basically if you are a teen they MIGHT work for you but after that... no.
dyna85 Posted May 31, 2015 Posted May 31, 2015 I wouldn't overanalyze this after one date. Just do what you feel and don't think too much about it. I could see if you were on the path to exclusivity, but one date? Do what you want to do and just have fun without overthinking it. Texting is for kids too, so I wouldn't get too hung up over it. 1
fitnessfan365 Posted May 31, 2015 Posted May 31, 2015 Would he still see me as a platonic friend even after a kiss and a 2nd date lined up? . Well as I said, I can only speak for myself. But even though kissing is great and a hot body is appreciated, what really pushes my buttons is flirtation and banter. It's just that in my experience, women today (especially online) tend to have the same type of mindset you do. If you flirt or banter at all, the relationship will turn completely sexual, etc.. Gotta admit though, "sex cloud" is a good term. But something simple like this works wonders : Him : I can be feisty too, but don't run away or escape You : That's good because I can't wait to get my hands on you.
Author ThisisIt606 Posted May 31, 2015 Author Posted May 31, 2015 Since we'll be going on date 2 soon... is this generally a good point to ask about past relationships, mostly being "when was your last relationship?" I want to know how long he's been single/how long of a recovery time he's had since his past relationship. I last dated a guy who was only 2 months out of a 9 month relationship and he was nottt ready for another, despite claiming he was.
fitnessfan365 Posted May 31, 2015 Posted May 31, 2015 Since we'll be going on date 2 soon... is this generally a good point to ask about past relationships, mostly being "when was your last relationship?" I want to know how long he's been single/how long of a recovery time he's had since his past relationship. I last dated a guy who was only 2 months out of a 9 month relationship and he was nottt ready for another, despite claiming he was. Asking about past relationships is a form of qualifying someone to see if they're ready for a new relationship. But potentially being in a relationship with this guy should not even be on your mind yet. After all, it's only the second date. For now, I'd say just focus on having fun and getting to know basic stuff about him. Spend time determining if this is a guy you even want to keep seeing week to week. If you have 6-8 good dates with him and see potential, then talk about it. In the beginning though, just have fun and be in the moment focusing on him.
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