How long did it take you to get over your first serious relationship?

[na27]

Thanks, but dont let my happiness shield whats underneath, there are a few scars/wounds, and getting to where i am now took a lot of pain, mostly mentally, but friends, socialising, work helped out a lot. Even now there are some doubts but they are fading, i do feel the moving on phase but like i said 2 steps back 3 steps forward. To say the least im alot stronger now than before, yup i hope so too, if not atleast this girl showed me that there are alot more girls that i click with, out there!!

 

Oh for sure, I know it probably took a lot to get to that point. Time and work and friends like you said will hopefully help me as well in the future. It's a good point that you make, about her showing you that there's more girls you can click with. It's awesome that you made it this far.

[Syberia]

I am not over it, because it's still going after 9 years. My only other relationship, though it lasted for 5 months, was never really "serious" and I was over her pretty much immediately once my wife came into the picture.

[na27]

It wasn't just him I moved away from. There were other reasons. I'm glad I did, because not only did it help me move on, but opened up more opportunities and exposed me to a better dating pool. It really helps not having to run into them.

 

Yeah, I'm in the same situation, I have had a solid plan to move for three years now and we both knew it was happening - I would probably never move just to get away from someone either. However I am thankful that I am able to have that option right now because I also fear running into him. In our town, it's pretty easy to run into other people. And he's always up and about so this summer is going to be difficult trying to dodge him.

 

I'm hoping that with the move, I will be able to move on and heal properly and even eventually if I feel up to it, meet someone else. But for now I can't wait to move just to start moving on with the situation and focusing on other aspects of life.

[na27]

This is the 4th week post BU with my 'first love'

 

Definitely wouldn't wish this pain on my worst enemy. It hurts, but as time goes by I have accepted the situation more and more. Things are slowly getting easier, but the initial pain is still there, and that's what I wish to go away!

 

Doesn't help that I can't get her 'out of sight, out of mind' as she works 2 minutes from me and I see her car with all my belongings in almost daily... The pain comes in waves, sometimes i'll feel positive and then BAM a hard emotional state for a while.

 

I hope everybody is having a positive day

 

I'm a little over two weeks in and the pain is still pretty intense. Hopefully with time, I'll be able to have better days. I would not do well with seeing him or his car almost daily - so I am sorry you have to deal with that and maybe one day it won't hurt as much. And I also hope you get your stuff back soon!

[na27]

Well I broke NC today and it ended in shatters. She raged at me the more we talked about the past, she said I ruined her day. I was just in shambles right now. I think I'll need another few months to recover from this blow. Someone help

 

I broke NC yesterday and it also ended in shatters. I called him during a breakdown and in a very weak moment began to question the whole relationship and everything that went down. It went about as bad as it could. I'm going to need a while as well to try and forget this, so I completely understand. Yesterday for me was the hardest day since the breakup. I hope better days are in store for us. It hurts like hell right now.

[john1992]

I broke NC yesterday and it also ended in shatters. I called him during a breakdown and in a very weak moment began to question the whole relationship and everything that went down. It went about as bad as it could. I'm going to need a while as well to try and forget this, so I completely understand. Yesterday for me was the hardest day since the breakup. I hope better days are in store for us. It hurts like hell right now.

 

Same here also broke nc last week to find out how she was doing. She saw the message but didnt respond, i dont love her anymore but i am that guy who doesn't wanna forget her cause all the fun we had. Told me She loved me and next day dumped me out of nowhere. For her i am just an other page in her book she ripped out and forgot about. We enjoyed the time we spend together every day and had alot of awsome trips and vacation. And suddenly she forgets everything and i dont exist for her anymore thats what hurts the most..

[Itspointless]

I guess witnessing someone having pain for years and waiting for death (everyday for a couple of years) in my teenage years left me with some scars. It took me a long time to get back some faith in life. That feeling of utter emptiness returned with my first break-up. Once you have been there ...

[kasop]

Well I broke NC today and it ended in shatters. She raged at me the more we talked about the past, she said I ruined her day. I was just in shambles right now. I think I'll need another few months to recover from this blow. Someone help

 

Imbax i read your entire thread about your situation and man you had many great loveshackers tell you that breaking nc is a bad idea. I geuss for some of us it takes a few times us to learn. But dont beat yourself up too bad. I broke nc twice and of course regret it but it helped me learn