Guitarisgood Posted May 29, 2015 Posted May 29, 2015 I just want a girls take on this... Initially we would simply message to and fro. I don't know what happened but she eventually started messaging me more. At uni she started hanging around or sitting with me more. It culminated in her messaging me 24/7 replying instantly. I was obvious oblivious or not interested. Funnily enough she started to withdraw and I obviously caught on and started to chase. I mean we went out for dinner once but she basically threw every sign in the book that she was not interested. Obviously since then we have gone back to our usual self where we message to and fro though more sparingly. Though on occasion where situation presents we'd message instantly and as if her wall breaks down and I then see the real her. Her birthday recently came up and obviously people posted photoes of their time with her. What I saw was an insight and this showed her as this lovable, cheeky, fun loving, girl. Thats the girl that I would be crazy about. So why was and still is her wall up around me? Why don't I get to get to know this girl that I see from photoes people have posted? Instead of even when we started getting to know each other, this girl who was so quiet and awkward towards me. Obviously I plan to talk to her about this but thought I'd ask the crew to get some insight?
Redhead14 Posted May 29, 2015 Posted May 29, 2015 I just want a girls take on this... Initially we would simply message to and fro. I don't know what happened but she eventually started messaging me more. At uni she started hanging around or sitting with me more. It culminated in her messaging me 24/7 replying instantly. I was obvious oblivious or not interested. Funnily enough she started to withdraw and I obviously caught on and started to chase. I mean we went out for dinner once but she basically threw every sign in the book that she was not interested. Obviously since then we have gone back to our usual self where we message to and fro though more sparingly. Though on occasion where situation presents we'd message instantly and as if her wall breaks down and I then see the real her. Her birthday recently came up and obviously people posted photoes of their time with her. What I saw was an insight and this showed her as this lovable, cheeky, fun loving, girl. Thats the girl that I would be crazy about. So why was and still is her wall up around me? Why don't I get to get to know this girl that I see from photoes people have posted? Instead of even when we started getting to know each other, this girl who was so quiet and awkward towards me. Obviously I plan to talk to her about this but thought I'd ask the crew to get some insight? Well, I'd say that when she was showing so much interest earlier and you were oblivious or not interested, she got that message. So now, she's feeling a little rejected but accepting it at least a friendship. If you've become that interested in her, show her. Call her, talk to her, ask her out. 1
Versacehottie Posted May 29, 2015 Posted May 29, 2015 um, i'm just going to go out on a limb here and say examine your own behavior too. Clearly, she was/is interested in you but is being cautious. I'd guess that you are not showing your interest in her as clearly as you may think you are. I've noticed that sometimes guys are not forthcoming with compliments or one or two sweet things that would show you like HER specifically and are not just going with flow of flirting and ego boost. I think they think it makes them look weak with a girl they like and guys are generally cautious about opening up about feelings. However, if the beginning of your romance has dragged out for whatever reason, it's hard to maintain her end without definitive reassurance of some sort from you. That's why it's push/pull; hot/cold. Unless you think she immature and flighty, which I gather from your post and because you have a friendship, she is not. She's a genuine good girl who's confused by you. Guessing she is matching your level of effort and your back and forth or how she perceives it. Do something more reassuring. You can even start with commenting on her photos to her directly like you spoke about here. I can imagine a compliment being seen as that type of person by someone you care about will be well received.
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