For all the people who said it was over! I guess you were right! Long but definitive!

[simon_uk]

So for all of those people who told me that it was over, I guess my friends you were right. To be honest I dont think my ex has a clue what she is thinking. so I will never know.

 

I sent the following text, I know I know text is rubbish but I thought it romantic! ssuming she has got the text that is!!!!!! worry worry

 

today is a beautiful day

taoday i love you more than yesterday

today i am very confused

today i dont know if i have the wrong impression

today is the day to be brave

today my life will change

today my heart will beat or

today my heart will die

today i will be at merry england 3pm (cafe near where she lives, Not romantic I know but convenient for her)

you know the reason why

 

She replied and said she was in Scotland ,

 

I replied to her text told her I could be in Scotland by 6. she replied and said dont do this to me please. So I rang her and she was so horrible. I asked her to calm down please and told her that I had received the song. She said what song? So I reminded her and she said that was ages ago. I said it was Thursday morning and I thought it meant something. I was just waiting for more confirmation from you that you wanted me. She said dont you think I would have told you by now if I did? She was shouting and saying I was spoiling her birthday. That she has moved on and she didnt want me anymore. I asked again why she sent teh song and she said because she was drunk. She said do you think becasue you sent me a letter everything is alright. I sadi no but I thought because of the song you wanted me and she sadi well I dont. End of call. I sent her a message after saying. That was the most horrible thing you could have doen sending me taht song. I hope you are happy. dont ever do it again. Enjoy your birthday.

 

I sent her a text and said what you did was unforgiveable what I did was very brave, I bught flowers and a ring and planned to meet you at 3 pm and go down on one knee. I didnt think you could be so heartless, you have destroyed me, teh she sent me the following three messages

 

Message 1

Brave?! Shame uv reacted two days later!? And shame u dint do it when I loved you that much! I said no b4 do you want to ruin my birthday? I thought we could have been friends but...........I will come get my things asap

 

Message 2

 

Unforgiveable?

 

Message 3

 

At Merry England? ( that is a cafe near her house but I just wanted it to be close to her)

 

I replied maybe I shouldnt have done, I tried ringing but she turned her phone off so I replied by text

 

My plan for your birthday was an hot air balloon with champagne. Im sorry you ended it before that happened. I didnt respond to the song because I didnt know whether I believed it. I just wanted to meet you close to you thats why I said Merry England It is a shame I didnt do it sooner yes, but that doesnt mean I never wanted to. I could accept that you dont want me what I said was unforgiveable was sending the song and saying you didnt mean it. You overheard a conversation with Monkey (My jeweller friend) and thought I was giving you a ring at christmas when I was trying to plan the most wonderful day I could for your birthday. I wasnt trying to spoil your day today, I wanted to make it special because I thought you wanted that after the song. Just forget about it and me baby and have a ball. I wanted it, you dont its over. But I love you anyway if you want to hate me thats fine but i havent done anything bad. I gave you plenty of space then I sent a letter telling you what you man to me then I left it! you sent me a song, I planned to send you one back but you answered the phone. I analyzed the song I consideredwhether you were drunk then decided to go with my heart and do something drastic and ask you to meet me how is that ruining your birthday? Enjoy yourself and forget i bothered you

 

 

Not heard anything back! I now believe its truly over and seems like she hates me too. I think she is playing with my head because on the phone she said she didnt mean to send the song, she was drunk but in her first message she says shame you didnt react for two days. Mind Games and I don't need em!

 

What do you think? I can accept her not wanting to be with me but why be nasty and say I spoiled her birthday? She spoiled my life! (temporarily of course) I haven't done anything wrong just acted on what I thought she gave me.

[HoldOn]

Wait... She said the song meant nothing, but that you were supposed to respond to it with your own song. But responding to it with a phone call wasn't right. I am so confused!

 

Glad to hear that it's really over and now you can start moving on, hopefully. A good relationship isn't supposed to work like this.

[simon_uk]

I dont get it either! But she was probably drunk on both occasions! Like I said I can deal with her not wanting to be with me but not being nasty and playing mind games!

[sanne]

dont be so hard on yourself, I think we all would like to think our situations are all different but most of the time they are not. we've all been through what you've been through so don't worry. i think until you experience these things on your own and learn from your own mistakes will you ever gain the wisdom and clarity that all of us now have. life is too short to be wasting it on someone who treats you like crap, there are tons of girls out there and this one just wasn't the right one for you.

[HoldOn]

think until you experience these things on your own and learn from your own mistakes will you ever gain the wisdom and clarity that all of us now have.

 

 

that's right, I have made worse mistakes than most everyone on this website. I let my ex walk all over me and charge $30,000 on my credit card. And I kept taking him back again and again everytime he left me.

 

That's why I am so adamant about people not accepting less than you're worth!

 

You do have to make your own mistakes to learn from them. So I hope you've learned a lot from yours, simon.

[Marshbear]

My ex said some very hurtful and mean things to me after I broke up with her. It just shows how immature and spoiled people can be when their mad. You can't take it personally and just try to forget her and move on. I think she knew what she was doing when she sent you the song and was just playing with you. Like I said immature.

 

I would try to put her out of you heart and mind. It will take awhile but she really isn't worth another thought. Why is it we fall for the ones who treat us like SH*T?

[simon_uk]

Well I have been dumped before, 6 months before I metthe current ex. I was with her for three years. When she ended it, I begged and pleaded so much that she said she was having panic attacks and changed her phone. So I knew 1) I would never get like that again because it doesnt work and 2) I was never going to let a woman hurt me so bad again. Probably why I kept my feelings quite close to my chest. My last ex knew how badly I was hurt and always tried to comfort me. Saying things like, she probably did still love you but you chased her away etc. I tolde her how bad she made me feel and she said 'she' would never make me feel like that. Well frankly she has made me feel worse by sending that song and giving me false hope and then having the cheek to say I am ruining her birthday. I gave her plenty of space like i said. I rang her one week after the split just for clarification of her feelings. Then sent her a letter 3 weeks later explaining my feelings and where I thought I had gone wrong. The next time I contacted her was one week after the letter and 2 days after the song she sent to me.

 

So I dont think I have done anything wrong!!!!! I have acted on my emotions that were inspired by her song!!!!!!

 

Do you think I have gone over the top? Honestly? Because I dont, I havent pressured her in any way!

[LucreziaBorgia]

Put your hand in a beartrap. SNAP!!! Ow, damn that hurt.

You know, maybe it wasn't so bad. I'll try that again. SNAP!!! Ow, ow, ow f*ck!!!

Ok, its healed. I'll try it one more time... and it BETTER not hurt. SNAP!!! Ow, damn it, f*ck!!!

Ok, I'm giving it one more chance. Because I think I can make it not hurt this time. SNAP!!! OWWW!!

I'm not doing that ever again. Ok, maybe once more because maybe... just maybe... SNAP!!! F*CK!! OW!!

 

Eventually, you'll get to the point where you'll stop willingly putting your hand in the beartrap. But you have to convince yourself not to and assure yourself that even putting a finger in the beartrap will be agony. Any contact with this girl right now is going to continue to mangle your heart.

 

Right now, contact with this girl is the beartrap. You are mangling your heart by going back to contact with her. How to avoid the pain? Don't put yourself in a position to be hurt. Throw out the beartrap, go full on 'no contact' with this girl. No, none, nada - until you can heal up a little bit. Block her emails, her phone number, and if she does get through, ask her to leave you alone and either leave or hang up.

[simon_uk]

Yes I agree! But I only contacted her because of that ****ed up song! and now I am in the wrong!

[latefragment]

simon i hear you. my situation is totally similar. he was drunk and told me that he loved me (which he's never said those words before) and was very affectionate to me... a week later when i called he was cold, distant, mean and horrible. i felt so STUPID for calling after that... it's like, they tempt you with a carrot, you take the bait, then you're in the wrong. i hate it, i hate it, that set me back a couple weeks of healing, right there! i just want you to know i hear you...

[Nick14]

Originally posted by simon_uk

Yes I agree! But I only contacted her because of that ****ed up song! and now I am in the wrong!

 

True but you made a mistake, you kept on texting her alot after that. If she said leave me alone, then leave it be and walk away. I dunno why you even texted her in the first place with that song. If she sent you that song, wouldn't you think she call later that day and go "did you get what I sent you"???