farrah5451 Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 After almost a year together, he did it. We have been together and ate so happy .. of course there are issues, we have to deal with, they are just different issues now but we are united and communicate about them. I just wanted to give you all an update. After all the tears, pain, wonderiung..we finally did it. We are happy together and in love, hopefully we'll deal with all the negatives around us. Thank you all for your support 4
Popsicle Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 After almost a year together, he did it. We have been together and ate so happy .. of course there are issues, we have to deal with, they are just different issues now but we are united and communicate about them. I just wanted to give you all an update. After all the tears, pain, wonderiung..we finally did it. We are happy together and in love, hopefully we'll deal with all the negatives around us. Thank you all for your support Congratulations and good luck in the future. 1
anika99 Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 Well actually less than 2 months ago you posted that he left and then he went back. It was around mid April apparently that he left again? So that makes it more like 1 month. I say don't let him move in with you and don't count your chickens before they're hatched. 1
Author farrah5451 Posted May 21, 2015 Author Posted May 21, 2015 Well actually less than 2 months ago you posted that he left and then he went back. It was around mid April apparently that he left again? So that makes it more like 1 month. I say don't let him move in with you and don't count your chickens before they're hatched. Ok its a month and a half, thats why I said almost 2 months.... we take it day by day
Author farrah5451 Posted May 21, 2015 Author Posted May 21, 2015 Well actually less than 2 months ago you posted that he left and then he went back. It was around mid April apparently that he left again? So that makes it more like 1 month. I say don't let him move in with you and don't count your chickens before they're hatched. Ok its a month and a half, thats why I said almost 2 months.... we take it day by day ...I didn't move him in.
goodyblue Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 Ok its a month and a half, thats why I said almost 2 months.... we take it day by day ...I didn't move him in. You are going to get a lot of negative feedback so just try and ignore it. Do your best to be open about everything. I think what saved us was dating for a good while before living together, and some therapy to deal with the.transition. Good luck and I hope your future is bright. 3
Author farrah5451 Posted May 21, 2015 Author Posted May 21, 2015 You are going to get a lot of negative feedback so just try and ignore it. Do your best to be open about everything. I think what saved us was dating for a good while before living together, and some therapy to deal with the.transition. Good luck and I hope your future is bright. Thank you, we are doing exactly that and we are in therapy together. So much negativity around us, but we have a great therapist and we really love each other. I appreciate your kind words 1
cocorico Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 Thank you, we are doing exactly that and we are in therapy together. So much negativity around us, but we have a great therapist and we really love each other. I appreciate your kind words Farrah, we found that having been through the A made us more aware of potentially negative dynamics than we'd been in previous relationships - plus that period of wanting to be together and having to face obstacles (including his M) to get there has kept us conscious of how much we love each other and want to be together. The only negativity we have faced has been on here - and from the xBW of course - but we have had many other challenges. Having a common goal, and feeling that we're on the same team has really helped us. We know how awful relationships can be, and we're determined not to let ourselves become like that. It sounds as though you're on the right track. Two months is still early days, but I'm sure you're giving it what it takes. Good luck - I hope it just gets better and better 3
RoseVille Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 Argh. I got so used to seeing threads/comments about moving on and the selfishness of MMs that I was feeling all empowered to move on, but seeing stuff like this gives me a glimmer of hope. Must. Not. Fall. Down. Rabbit. Hole. 7
daisygirl19 Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 Good luck to you. I am in a similar situation and wish you all the best. It's nice to know there are others who have had this outcome. 1
Lightglowabove Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 After almost a year together, he did it. We have been together and ate so happy .. of course there are issues, we have to deal with, they are just different issues now but we are united and communicate about them. I just wanted to give you all an update. After all the tears, pain, wonderiung..we finally did it. We are happy together and in love, hopefully we'll deal with all the negatives around us. Thank you all for your support I am so happy for you! I am with my MM now and we are working things out but so much in love. Good luck for a beautiful future
whichwayisup Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 Argh. I got so used to seeing threads/comments about moving on and the selfishness of MMs that I was feeling all empowered to move on, but seeing stuff like this gives me a glimmer of hope. Must. Not. Fall. Down. Rabbit. Hole. Stay strong Rose! Some MM do leave obviously, and those who do, have a plan and actually follow through on it, they don't lie, play games with their AP, they don't act like a.ss clowns. Good luck farah and just get to know him in a proper way, rid of the affair dynamic and take things slowly. 1
goodyblue Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 Stay strong Rose! Some MM do leave obviously, and those who do, have a plan and actually follow through on it, they don't lie, play games with their AP, they don't act like a.ss clowns. Good luck farah and just get to know him in a proper way, rid of the affair dynamic and take things slowly. Wwip, definitely hit the nail on the head. My guy was honest, never lied and we had a concrete plan in place, when things came to a head 8 months early, he told his ex everything and left. If he is using you, lying, or is a serial cheat, keeps changing the timeline, or does the push pull, beware. Well, beware anyway. 4
Foodjunkie79 Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 The thing is....only you know this man!! We are only getting a one sided version of events, which is usually yours and our own opinions are based on that!! So based on that we can all attack and say 'stay away', 'don't do it' etc. Whatever the outcome...I guess its a learning curve! We all learn from the decisions we make. I wish you well Sister x
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