Tuutuu22 Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 Long story short my boyfriend went to the Bahamas in March for spring break. He had planned the trip with his guys before he even met me. Fair enough , he went i got a call once a day. Around the same time my family friend I've known since I was 2 asked me to go to his prom as friends because he needed a date. I spoke with my boyfriend he said it would hurt him, so I didn't go to the prom with my friend. Flash forward to June my boyfriend is asking me if he can do a "senior scavenger hunt" in a group of guys and girls and it involves some sexual things "but obviously I wouldn't be doing any of it I would just be around it" is what he told me. I told him It would hurt me but if its something you feel you need to do, do it but when I do something similiar I don't want to hear it." He then decided he wasn't going to do it. The next day he is asking me about it again saying I didn't give him a yes or a no therefore i was playing mind games. he also said his mom told him he should do it. At this point i'm beyond insulted because now he is trying to make me feel guilty. I posted a picture with one of my guy friends for his birthday and my boyfriend started to ignore me and then when i called him he didn't pick up till i said it was an emergency because he will ignore me for a day and upset me i didn't want that to happen. When he answered he said "IM doing the scavenger hunt tomorrow night" I'm very hurt, I deserve better. I didn't go to prom because I knew it would hurt him but he can do whatever he wants. How is that not a double standard. i don't even want to look at him or see him I am so hurt and angry.
KatZee Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 I'm a firm believer in not asking permission to do things when you're in a relationship. What is he? Your keeper? It's your life and if you're not crossing boundaries or doing anything wrong, what's the problem? One person's insecurities doesn't give them the right to dictate your life what you do with it. If he trusts you and you trust him, what's the problem doing things? If you trust he would do a scavenger hunt and not participate then whatever, he should go. However, the double standard thing is not cool at all and if you remain with him if be quite clear that you're going to just do whatever you want to do within reason. Being in a relationship doesn't mean you each now control each other. 1
PegNosePete Posted May 21, 2015 Posted May 21, 2015 He sounds like a total douche canoe. He wants to have a girlfriend but live like a single guy. He has no commitment, and does not respect you or your relationship. Tell him you're not interested in a relationship with someone who plays these stupid games, and that you're over. 2
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