nikamelodia89 Posted May 18, 2015 Posted May 18, 2015 I need some advice. I've started dating this guy. I haven't dated in a very long time. I've had too much bad luck and I guess I sorta gave up for a while and decided to work on myself and just be single for a while. But now this man came into my life and he is stirring my emotions and I am scared. He's not ready for a relationship. He just got out of one and at the moment he is all mixed up and hurting. I want to be there for him and help him out of his pain. I'm a very caring person and I feel what others feel. When they cry I cry when they hurt I hurt. Its just how I am. I'm trying so hard to just take it slow and just help him out of this hell he's walking through. But I like him a lot. We connect on a completely different level. I have never connected to someone like this before and I've never believed in soul mates or true love. But I believe our souls sorta connect. We think the same. We both finish each others sentences, we r almost the same person. He knows how I think and vice versa. And no one knows my mind. Its a mixed up world I. There and I'm usually misunderstood. But with him.. I'm not. Idk what to do. Do I need to get out before this becomes a world full of pain? Or should I just be a friend for now? What do I do?
Satu Posted May 18, 2015 Posted May 18, 2015 Its most likely that you will be bad for each other, by opening up each other's wounds. Thats not definite, but it's a likely outcome. Be mindful.
Redhead14 Posted May 18, 2015 Posted May 18, 2015 I need some advice. I've started dating this guy. I haven't dated in a very long time. I've had too much bad luck and I guess I sorta gave up for a while and decided to work on myself and just be single for a while. But now this man came into my life and he is stirring my emotions and I am scared. He's not ready for a relationship. He just got out of one and at the moment he is all mixed up and hurting. I want to be there for him and help him out of his pain. I'm a very caring person and I feel what others feel. When they cry I cry when they hurt I hurt. Its just how I am. I'm trying so hard to just take it slow and just help him out of this hell he's walking through. But I like him a lot. We connect on a completely different level. I have never connected to someone like this before and I've never believed in soul mates or true love. But I believe our souls sorta connect. We think the same. We both finish each others sentences, we r almost the same person. He knows how I think and vice versa. And no one knows my mind. Its a mixed up world I. There and I'm usually misunderstood. But with him.. I'm not. Idk what to do. Do I need to get out before this becomes a world full of pain? Or should I just be a friend for now? What do I do? He's not ready for a relationship. He just got out of one and at the moment he is all mixed up and hurting -- Given your own history, I'd say move on. You are not in a position emotionally to be taking on the role of care taker/supporter for someone. I don't know how long you've been dating, but it sounds to me like you are way too invested already. You should just be supportive. Don't offer to do things for him. Just listen. 1
Author nikamelodia89 Posted May 18, 2015 Author Posted May 18, 2015 His words r... Third time is charm, and he only has one more try and don't want to screw it up. He also says that everything he touch's turns into sh*t. I think we could be good for each other. He's just not in the right place, emotionally. I also wanna show him that just because things didn't work out doesn't mean its all because of him. he has never had real love. Someone who actually cared for him. He's known lust. He's use to people waking on him and trying to control him. He's a nice guy. He wears his heart on his shoulders and its always been used. What he is going through now.. I've gone through. He's walking through the same hell I've walked I kind of just wanna help him. U know? Cuz I've been there and done it and I had no hand to hold ya know? I hate that I was fine and happy being single and just being me til he came along even if this doesn't work out with him. He's got me thinking about a relationship again and I don't want too but no matter how hard I try, I cannot control my emotions
Redhead14 Posted May 18, 2015 Posted May 18, 2015 His words r... Third time is charm, and he only has one more try and don't want to screw it up. He also says that everything he touch's turns into sh*t. I think we could be good for each other. He's just not in the right place, emotionally. I also wanna show him that just because things didn't work out doesn't mean its all because of him. he has never had real love. Someone who actually cared for him. He's known lust. He's use to people waking on him and trying to control him. He's a nice guy. He wears his heart on his shoulders and its always been used. What he is going through now.. I've gone through. He's walking through the same hell I've walked I kind of just wanna help him. U know? Cuz I've been there and done it and I had no hand to hold ya know? I hate that I was fine and happy being single and just being me til he came along even if this doesn't work out with him. He's got me thinking about a relationship again and I don't want too but no matter how hard I try, I cannot control my emotions You're right you really can't control emotions. What you can do is control your response to them. Take this very slowly if at all. Just because he had never had real love (and you don't really know that's true), you may be put in a position of having to prove your love often.
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