Why is a long-term monoamous relationship the goal in life?

[SmartDude]

I am seriously starting to question this whole idea that a life-long monogamous relationship is somehow better than having different lovers in ones life.

 

It seems the people that do get married mostly divorce long before "death do us part".

Wedding vows seem like a lie. I have had lovers that will "live in my heart forever" and that is real and everything. But do I want to hang out with them my whole life? Not really.

And seriously who wants to stay with the same person your whole life?

 

Anyone felt like im feeling now?

 

I have never had to depend on another person for my happiness. I don't see any good reason to do that now that I am in my early 40's.

 

existential crisis? Mid-life crisis? Im not sure.

[MissBee]

I am seriously starting to question this whole idea that a life-long monogamous relationship is somehow better than having different lovers in ones life.

 

It seems the people that do get married mostly divorce long before "death do us part".

Wedding vows seem like a lie. I have had lovers that will "live in my heart forever" and that is real and everything. But do I want to hang out with them my whole life? Not really.

And seriously who wants to stay with the same person your whole life?

 

Anyone felt like im feeling now?

 

I have never had to depend on another person for my happiness. I don't see any good reason to do that now that I am in my early 40's.

 

existential crisis? Mid-life crisis? Im not sure.

 

It certainly isn't everyone's goal and doesn't have to be.

 

Many people are serial monogamists.

 

For me, I both want to just find one person I can settle down with as well as sometimes find it scary to imagine "forever" with someone as I've never had that and worry about growing tired of them or what it might mean.

 

I don't need to depend on them for my happiness but having a partner is so much easier esp when it's a good relationship, where you genuinely like that person. Two heads are better than one, two incomes, having someone to do things with, if you want children having someone to help with that etc. All those things are nice and make life easier in many ways without it necessarily meaning you're depending on them for happiness.

[CarrieT]

It wasn't my goal until I hit my 50s.

 

Now it is only because I have finally met someone who shares the same values and interests and sense of adventure that I do so I know that I can grow old with someone and never be bored.