chrisssan Posted May 14, 2015 Posted May 14, 2015 (edited) So My ex dumped me about month and a half ago. I was a wreck for 2 weeks, begging for my ex to come back and clinging on to the hope that being a friend would make me feel better. Then I realized what's better for me and went on NC. Problem is, this is the first time she was in control as she got dumped every time she got in to relationship. Before I went NC, she just thotted around at a open house party on purposely, knowing that I would be hurt. She even admitted it, but I didn't call her out, I just stayed quiet. So after I went on NC, I started going to clubs and parties even more. About 2 weeks after NC, I happened to go to a club party where my ex was at. I didn't care about it because I brought like 6 girls over with me, and I was drunk from pre-gaming. That night, my ex yelled at me for no reason and I ignored her. After that "confrontation", she left the party early and went on to write a facebook status saying that I'm a hypocrite, called her a slut when I was trying to hit on her friends etc (basically calling me out to be an *********).... The thing is, I've never called her a slut, and I made sure I wouldn't dance with her social circle. She made sure I wouldnt see it by blocking me but my friends showed me the status. I pretended like I didn't see it, but after that, my ex literally stopped talking to me as well. Problem went even further when we had a end of year banquet. I was asked to go to one of the Asian club banquet by this girl I met, and ended up being surrounded by 5 other girls. But half way through, my ex walked in with her friends and saw me. Then she just grabbed the guy who was thirsty for her (she knows that as well, but didn't care since we ended up in bad term) and started to make facebook status about having a incredible date etc... She tried to make me feel jealous by flirting on purpose, which she's never done before, even before I met her. Funny thing is, I met few pretty girls who are attracted to me as well. So I didn't care much about it. In fact, I started dating casually again. However, recently, about 5 weeks after NC, I started feeling empty and just started to miss my ex like crazy. On top of that, I've crossed my ex numerous times due to finals at library, but we avoided each other. This made my feeling worse, because no matter how many girls i date or talk with, I still felt empty and alone. Its only a few days away from end of final and I will stay for summer classes while she is going back to her home. I wish to have a second chance but she done me wrong, but refuses to admit it. She is just being nasty by the fact that I didn't let her control me and ignoring it. In fact, she is not the person I met anymore, she became an attention whore. I dated/had sex with other girl after break up, but it wasn't the same. Is it because I still love her or am I afraid of being alone? My heart is telling me to talk to her so that I can delete and rewind everything. So we can start all over again next semester. I have a class with her due to my class requirements. I can't drop or change it so I must deal with it. Because of the situation, might as well try to reconcile. Should I talk to her, or should I just keep NC until she contacts me? Edited May 14, 2015 by chrisssan
sandylee1 Posted May 14, 2015 Posted May 14, 2015 Keep NC . It's the best thing for both of you right now. 1
Satu Posted May 14, 2015 Posted May 14, 2015 Too much drama and game-playing. ************************************************ *No direct contact in either direction. No sending or receiving of messages. No replies. Block any means she might use to contact you. *No indirect contact through third parties. *De-friend or delete from all social media. No monitoring of her on social media. *No 'little birds' feeding you news. *Tell people that you don't want to know anything about what she is doing or saying. ************************************************* 2
GoBlue Posted May 14, 2015 Posted May 14, 2015 My heart is telling me to talk to her so that I can delete and rewind everything. So we can start all over again next semester. I have a class with her due to my class requirements. I can't drop or change it so I must deal with it. Because of the situation, might as well try to reconcile. It doesn't work that way my friend. What's done is done and it can't ever be un-done. It can, however, be forgiven. You are forgetting one thing in this whole premise of yours, a relationship isn't built or maintained by the will of one person. Talk to her if you want - no harm in reaching out - but people don't "reconcile" simply because it's the convenient thing to do. Just because you're going to have a class together doesn't mean you're going to have a relationship. She may not be interested in reconciliation. I hope for both of your sakes that a friendship or a cordial existence can be forged. I hope it all works out.
AIJ Posted May 14, 2015 Posted May 14, 2015 Use the summer as an opportunity to get over her. When you come back and you're in the same class as her, you really won't care. By the sounds of it, you're both immature. Serious growing up needs to be done before either of you enter another relationship, let alone enter a relationship with each other again.
Mrlonelyone Posted May 15, 2015 Posted May 15, 2015 As the other posters have said use the summer to get over her. Forget her, in fact forget relationships right now. High school and college years are for finding out who you are (even if you don't go to college). Finding out who you are can and sometimes does mean finding a BF/GF Husband/Wife .... it is also OK if it does not. If you do reconcile with this woman it won't be because you alone want it. Go NC keep NC. If you still want her back by the time you are in class let her approach you first. Gauge her interest and take it from there.
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